


Sesshomaru's Fear

by Elohiniar



Series: Tales of The Dog Lord [2]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Complete, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-23
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-09-25 01:03:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 11
Words: 60,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20368075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elohiniar/pseuds/Elohiniar
Summary: Sequel to Sesshomaru's HeartAn old enemy seeks revenge on Sesshomaru while Rin is pregnant with their first child. Will Sesshomaru be able to save her or will Rin and his child perish?Rated for Lemons, Lemons and more Lemons.





	1. Six Months Later-the attack

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place six months after Sesshomaru's Heart. Rin is seven months pregnant with their first child.

“Rin run!” Jaken shrieked, running away with Nintojo in his skinny green fingers. He tripped over dried out broken branches and tall yellow grass. The sun would be setting soon. They were near the ocean. Jaken could hear the ocean waves crashing in the distance. Winter would be upon them soon.

“You’re useless Jaken!” Rin grabbed Nintojo from his hands and pointed it at the ogre coming at her. It was gigantic, red with one eye and a white bushy beard. They were running through thick brush that was yellow and dry. It bent down to grab both of them, in that moment Rin let loose an inferno, catching the dry brush and rotted out branches on fire. It screamed in pain and covered its sole eye. The smell of burned yokai flesh made Rin want to throw up again, but she had to keep moving. She grabbed Jaken by the hand and looked for Aun. Running with what felt like a watermelon strapped to her front was exhausting. She couldn’t get her knees up high enough to cover enough distance with each step. They were surrounded by ogre and something else in the distance that tickled her senses. Rin tried to stay low, hoping the bushes would provide them some cover. Rin doubled over in pain, her stomach cramped. She breathed through the pain before picking up again.

“Aun! Where are you!” Jaken yelled. Somehow they had lost track of the double headed dragon.

Rin clamped her hand over Jaken’s mouth, “quiet! There’s something more than ogres out there.”

Rin felt a cramp move across her growing stomach again. _No little one, it’s not time, especially not now!_ She ducked into a crop trees and hid underneath a grove trying vainly to catch her breath. Her stomach was much bigger now, and running was nearly impossible. There were more ogre stomping around, yelling at the top of their lungs. “Come out _she _of the Dog Lord!!”

“How do they know I am Sesshomaru’s?” Rin whispered more to herself than she did to Jaken.

“Your bond, and your smell,” Jaken mumbled next to her, “they know who’s yoki is inside of you.”

“Great,” Rin rolled her eyes, _could he make less enemies, _“shouldn’t that make them afraid?”

Jaken only scoffed in response.

Rin’s mind was racing, she had to get out there, but how? They were circling the area, she wasn’t fast enough and Jaken was too loud. “We need Aun,” she said quietly.

The attack had come out of nowhere. Rin was sitting on Aun’s back laughing about something she couldn’t remember. Sesshomaru glided next to her with his head held up proudly. It was probably something to do with Rin feeling the baby move and Sesshomaru’s hand resting on top of her bump. Jaken was behind her and then came the flying balls of fire, quickly followed by a hoard of ogres. Sesshomaru said he sensed something else further in front of them. Rin dodged the first few and then turned Aun to retreat. Sesshomaru turned the directions of the balls of fire and a battle of flames and green light began. Yokai in human form Rin couldn’t make out began retreating. Sesshomaru followed and ordered Rin to stay back. He no longer allowed her to join him in battle, not since the day she told him, she was pregnant.

As soon as Rin pulled Aun out of the way another horde came for her. Rin and Jaken understood the goal was to separate them. This was the second time this had happened in only a matter of days. The first stopped after Sesshomaru engaged them, this time it was as if a second front was waiting for Rin. Rin continued ducking in the bushes. She couldn’t see a way out, that last blast from Nintojo started a far. She tore the bottom of her kimono and tied it around her face. She kept her hand over Jaken’s mouth to keep him quiet.

“Where are you human? We can smell you!” Three more ogres came from the forest smashing trees with their fists, they were dangerously close to Rin’s hiding spot. Two were green, one was blue, they both had horns. Rin flipped her katana in her hand. She closed her eyes, _if I have to take them on I will. _

Rin grabbed Jaken’s hand, “follow me closely,” she threw Nintojo back at Jaken. She traipsed as quietly as she could but her footsteps were clumsier these days. She cursed under her breath as her feet broke twigs and snapped sticks on the ground. The ogres tracked her, stomping just feet away from her hiding spot from the noise she was making.

“Rin we won’t escape without Sesshomaru-sama!” Jaken whispered worried.

“We won’t escape if you won’t shut up!” Rin smacked him in the head. She tightened her grip on her sword and closed her eyes for just one moment, long enough for her need to be driven into the sword. “He knows, he’ll come.” _If only my stomach wasn’t so big I could run faster and take down a few of these ogres with me!_ Rin caught herself on the tree, she felt dizzy and sick to her stomach. She was scared. It was one thing to face a band of Yokai on her own especially with the sword Sesshomaru gave her, but not like this. Not when most of the time she tripped on her own feet, and she could feel tree branches slapping into her ankles and face. She rolled her ankle when she hit a hill and nearly fell down. She caught herself on a tree. “Stay low, there might be ten of them but they aren’t very smart,” Rin muttered to Jaken. _Where is Aun? _Rin and Jaken were knocked off and the last Rin heard was Aun shriek in pain.

The sun was bright, it was near sunset, the sky was orange. Rin touched the hilt of the sword, she felt anger but nothing more. Sesshomaru was livid. Rin took a deep breath trying to calm her heart from pounding out of her chest, while the ogres yelled for her. She slipped from the bushes and made a break for the next set of trees. She activated her sword and cut the legs out from one of the ogres but was thrown when it came down. She landed hard on her bottom. The blow caused her hand to slip free from Jaken. She didn’t see him anywhere, but she saw a fire burning off to her left. Rin landed on her side, guarding her growing belly and wincing as she scraped her arm. Her lavender kimono with yellow daisies was covered in dirt and twigs. She forced herself up and wiped blood from her cheek. When she tried to run a strong hand grabbed her shoulder. For one moment she thought it was Sesshomaru until she looked up and saw a face that was similar to his but not his at all.

Rin’s breath caught. This man, or demon, had pointed ears on the side of his head. He had stripes on cheeks just like Sesshomaru’s. His hands were clawed, and his white hair was tied tightly into a pony tail on top of his head. On his forehead rest a crescent moon.

“Who are you?” Rin demanded struggling to get free from his grasp. His claws dug into her shoulders, she flinched at the intrusion of his nails into her skin. _Sesshomaru, help me. _She thought.

The strange inu-yokai pulled Rin roughly into the air by her arm. Rin screamed. It was clear now that this man was not a friend. She gripped the hilt of the sword and closed her eyes, _please hurry. _She tried to unsheathe the sword, but the Yokai grabbed her hand and shoved it back down. She struggled against his grasp, trying to free her sword.

“Take that out and I’ll drop you,” somehow they were hovering near the cliff.

Rin’s eyes went wide and her lips dried out, they were hundreds of feet in the air.

The demon grabbed her by both shoulders and smelled her neck. “You wreak of him,” he shook her violently.

“Get off of me,” Rin tried to kick him. He was floating near a cliff, the water of the ocean was crashing below against large boulders. She grabbed the hilt of her sword trying to unsheathe it. She managed to get it loose this time, she flung the whip at Touma’s face. It just barely missed the Inu-Yokai. He grabbed her hand and smashed it against the armor on his side, she fought to keep the katana before it was flying towards the ground. Rin cradled her swollen wrist to her chest.

She felt a claw on the underside of her stomach, “now this is interesting…what would the heartless king be doing travelling with a human, especially one who is pregnant.” The white-faced demon looked up just as Rin saw a flash of white. “I was wondering how long it would take you to get here…if I hadn’t been watching you for months now, I wouldn’t believe he could lay hands on a human. You’re just like your father Sesshomaru.”

Rin looked up, she stared at Sesshomaru, he was emotionless, his face was hard. In her heart she was begging for him to do something. “I like this one’s smell Sesshomaru, it’s sweet,” he licked one of the open cuts on Rin’s cheek, “and now I have her scent. I told you one day I would return, and finish what you started…how about you hand over that fancy sword of yours.”

Sesshomaru teeth were grinding. He held Bakusaiga in his hand, it was flaring green. Rin had a brave face but through the bond it was her intense fear and the pain of falling that had called him from hunting his prey. It was as if her life would escape her if he didn’t come for her. Now as he watched this man paw at her, the one he had bonded to himself, his blood was boiling. _I cannot use Bakusaiga now, I risk hitting Rin. _“Touma,” Sesshomaru responded, he knew this man, their blades had crossed centuries before. “You seek to threaten this Sesshomaru.”

“It’s not that hard, I hold your mate in my hands,” he sniffed her cheek making Rin wince again. “And yet you show no emotion. Is she just carnal pleasure to you?”

Rin looked at the man holding her, he had only one eye, what was left of it was covered in scars and white. His teeth protruded from his mouth, his breath smelled rotten. His skin was paler than Sesshomaru’s. She tried once again to get loose of his grasp knowing that before she fell to the ground Sesshomaru would be able to catch her.

“Now this is a wonderful standoff,” Touma laughed. “If you use Bakusaiga, then you’ll risk hitting this girl. If you don’t,” he wrapped his hand around Rin’s neck. Rin gasped for air, “you risk me ripping her throat out.”

Rin held onto Touma’s wrists gulping desperately trying to breathe. She saw white around the edges of her eyes and then her world went black. Her body hung limply in Touma’s hand.

“Let her go, Touma. This has nothing to do with her. The battle is between you and I.” Sesshomaru remained still. Touma had the upper hand, he had Rin in his disgusting hands, he could snap her neck in the seconds it would take Sesshomaru to get Rin free of him.

“And that is where you are wrong, I told you, I would come back, and seek revenge. When you, the great Sesshomaru finally have something to lose! Here catch!” He threw Rin towards the rocks, and immediately drew his own sword to block Bakusaiga. Touma’s blade called forth a wave of lightening he sent after Rin as she fell.

“Rin!” Sesshomaru yelled, he flew down in a blast of white light, sending the power of Bakusaiga behind him. He caught her only inches from the jagged rocks that waited to fillet her body. He turned to find Touma, only to see the waves of lightening coming straight at them. With no time to move, he turned his body to block the blast, sheltering Rin with his own. He grunted in pain, feeling the shocks singe his back. He used a free hand to grip the hilt of Tenseiga and was enveloped in a thick black barrier. As soon as the light was gone, he looked up. No one was there.

From a distance a haunting voice came over the wind, “hide her well Sesshomaru, I look forward to making her my prey.”


	2. Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru and Rin deal with the aftermath of Touma's attack.

Sesshomaru stroked Rin’s damp hair from her face. He crouched on the jagged rocks, holding his mate close to his heart. He touched the scrapes that littered her face. He snarled when he pulled back her hair revealing finger mark bruising around her neck. Her limp pregnant body was bathed in sweat, her clothes soaked completely through. “Rin,” he caressed her chin with his thumb. “Rin wake up,” he shook her lightly. Sesshomaru picked her up in his arms and pulled her to his chest. Her stomach made it awkward to bend her knees in his other arm. He put his ear to her lips and listened for her breathing. Relief washed over him when he felt her breath against the point of his ear. He flew to the top of the cliff, mokomoko whipping in the ocean breeze. She wanted to see the ocean, she asked him to bring her to the waves, before their child would be born. _We’ll return._ He told himself, _one day. _

“Jaken!” He yelled in fury the moment his black shoes hit the scorched ground. He would strangle the imp for allowing this to happen.

“Here, Sesshomaru-sama,” Jaken limped to Sesshomaru, falling on his knees before the Inu-Yokai’s feet. It didn’t escape Sesshomaru’s eyes that both of Jaken’s hands were burnt, and he had a deep gash across his middle. _What happened here? _There were at least four ogre bodies on the ground. Even pregnant she could defend herself. A fire raged meters away in the yellow brush from Nintojo. The ground stunk from the blood of the fallen bodies. Somewhere, Aun was injured.

“Find Aun,” Sesshomaru demanded, “and bring me Rin’s katana from the rocks below.” Six more Ogres charged towards Sesshomaru but they were of no consequence, one swing of Bakusaiga and they were gone. They fell to pieces on the ground. Sesshomaru sat down with Rin in his arms. He kissed her lips and brushed her cheek with his hand again, trying to stir her. He lay a tender hand on the mound of her stomach, hoping to feel the life that was within. “Rin,” he murmured in her ear, “Rin wake up.” Her eyes remained shut.

“I found him!” Jaken called from within a crop of scorched trees, “Aun is hurt. His skin is burned.” The two limped forward with Jaken holding the reigns.

“Jaken what happened?” Sesshomaru pointed his sword at the toad’s neck, “I trust you to keep her safe.”

“I’m not sure Sesshomaru-sama,” Jaken folded his hands over his waist, “when you said to leave we did, but there was another horde of ogres waiting for us. Rin isn’t capable of defending herself as well in her current state,” Jaken immediately ducked Sesshomaru’s hand, “does it matter not that I am also injured? There were too many ogres and that Inu-yokai Touma!”

“You failed,” Sesshomaru carefully put Rin onto Aun side saddle. He sat behind her cradling her head, “we go.” He directed Aun towards the west, unsure of what his next move would be. _So Touma has returned…_Sesshomaru touched Rin’s belly, her stomach was still and so was his heart, _he would threaten my child. _Something had changed since that night he had taken Rin to him. He was unsure what to call her, in human terms perhaps she was now his wife, a mate, a bonded one. Once he began sharing himself with her he couldn’t stop. He lost himself in the bond to Rin and in her body. When the slightest light of reality began to crash down on his shoulders that he had been making love to a human for a month while she healed, he thought to break the bond. He was disgusted with himself and repulsed by his heart. He considered letting her go back to Kaede’s village or any village, and attempting to rid himself of that bond, but then she told him that there was life inside of her, a life that he was responsible for.

* * *

_She called him to a wood while he hunted for stronger prey to train his sword on. They had practiced using the katana that connected them to call him. She felt elated in the calling. It did his heart well when she sent for him like that, when she yearned to be near him. He let his prey go and returned to Rin. As he landed he embraced her, he couldn’t help himself, his lips met hers. Her kisses were becoming bolder in those days, the shyness she once had was dissipating as they spent more time together. She placed his hand on her taught stomach, just below her navel and whispered, “the strongest hanyou.”_

_ His stomach pitched, he couldn’t believe it. She was not the first woman he had been with, but never before had his seed taken. “You’re sure?” He questioned her, running the tips of his claws over her stomach. He had been told, he should be able to sense a pregnancy in a demoness, but he couldn’t with Rin. _

_ “I’m late,” she smiled, tears glistening in her eyes, “and I keep throwing up.” She pulled his face down to hers, “please, say something? Are you happy?”_

_ “My child grows within you?” His mind couldn’t grasp it. “How do you know?”_

_ She nodded her head, “remember my cycle? When I bleed once a month? I should have had one by now, a while ago and I haven’t. And in human pregnancies, mother’s throw up, often.”_

_ “Is that why you’ve been so sick?” He traced the line of her jaw with her thumb and laced her mouth with his, “you carry my child?” _

_ “Yes,” the small pools of water that gathered at the corner of her eyes dripped down her cheeks to mingle with his tongue as he opened his mouth against hers. _

_ “This Sesshomaru is very happy, come,” he felt a primal need to make love to her. He flew her to a quiet place in the forest near the running water and tenderly removed their clothes. He held her so close to his skin, he couldn’t remember where she ended and he began. He made love to her, covering her body with his, her on her hands and knees until she was crying his name and afterwards covered their naked bodies with his haori and his mokomoko. He couldn’t believe it, 900 years and he would finally be a father. In the aftermath of their love making, he held her sweat soaked body against his, “when?” He ran his fingers over her lower abdomen, imagining beneath them, his son was already forming. _

_ “Humans carry for nine months. So another eight months, about,” her arm was draped over his chest. Her chin rest near his collar bone and her face was pressed against his. _

_ “Just before spring,” he said in her ear, “it is a good time to be born,” he stroked her hair. He turned to face her, “you are still anxious?”_

_ “I was afraid you would be upset,” she said quietly._

_ “No,” he filled her mouth with his. “Will you be sick often?”_

_ “It’s the worst in the beginning. Maybe you should leave me at Kaede’s-”_

_ He set two fingers over her mouth, “no, you will remain with this Sesshomaru. We will travel slower, and rest more, and do this more,” he pulled her waist back to his. He was hungry for her, “you carry my child.”_

_ “Yes,” she answered, her lips brushing his, “your child.”_

_ “You are mine,” he pulled her beneath him, “this Sesshomaru is in love with you.” Then gone were the thoughts of abandoning her, of finding a way to break their bond. He lost himself inside of her, inside his great love for her._

* * *

Sesshomaru heard a groan next to his ear, and felt Rin begin to move, “Sesshomaru?” She gripped his hand.

He returned the pressure against his hand, in his mind he cursed his heart. It was as if their bodies were magnets towards each other. “Rin,” he held her gaze, “Rin, you’re safe now.” He closed his eyes against her brow.

Rin breathed a sigh of relief, and touched her stomach. She was unsure if the child growing within her could stand anymore stress, or if she could. She felt her stomach roiling, “land Aun,” she cried desperately. She could already feel the chunks churning her stomach, the wicked burn of acid and the fiery river of food that rose from her throat. She leaned over the saddle before A-Un even hit the ground and began heaving. The bile burned her throat. She steadied herself holding on to A while Un looked disgusted. Sesshomaru turned his head repulsed by the smell. He rubbed her back gently.

Rin slid off the two headed Dragon’s back, landing on her hands and knees. She heaved more. Several moments of her back contracting and her stomach bringing up everything she had eaten that day later, she finally felt like she could stand again. She forced herself up awkwardly, wiping her mouth. Rin steadied herself on Aun breathing fitfully.

Sesshomaru stood nearby, his eyes were towards the sky. “We go,” he told her.

“No,” Rin refused to remount Aun. She waddled as quickly as she could towards what she hoped was a body of water. She wanted to rinse her mouth out. She wanted to bathe and sleep. She felt dizzied and disoriented from the fall. Sesshomaru followed behind her closely, “we can’t stop now,” he grabbed her by the elbow, “we need to get further away.”

“You heard him, he has my scent! What does it matter!” She raised her voice at him.

He ground his teeth in frustration. She smelled of anger, fear and exhaustion. “You can rest with this Sesshomaru on Aun.”

“No,” she pulled away from him.

“Rin,” he started, holding onto her elbow again.

“Don’t you Rin me! Who was he anyway? An old rival? Someone the great Sesshomaru never feared because no one is as strong as you, you arrogant bastard!” Rin’s vexation at Sesshomaru for putting their child at risk blinded her. Her eyes were spiderwebs of red. She raised her hand and slammed it down on cheek as hard as she could. She cursed as the pain reverberated through her hand, instead of his face.

His eyes widened, those golden eyes narrowed, he bared his teeth at her, “you will not hit this Sesshomaru again.” Confusion washed over Sesshomaru, his presence usually calmed her, but these days she was erratic, he understood her less and less.

“And you will not touch this Rin again,” she ripped her arm free of his grasp and continued walking towards the sound of running water in the air.

Jaken was on the ground with his mouth open. Sesshomaru stared back at him daring to say a single word. “Jaken no further,” he roared and followed behind Rin.

Aun flew ahead, being the one that carried the things they used to make camp. When Rin was a child she didn’t need much but now that she was with child, there were a few blankets and one spare kimono she wore. That was how it went most nights, Jaken was allowed to make camp but at a certain point as the woods began to grow more trees, Sesshomaru ordered him back. Jaken was left to listen to what he would rather not have. He knew Sesshomaru-sama was a proud and powerful dai-yokai but he never imagined that he would lower himself to cohabiting with a human. Tonight, he knew that if he stepped one more foot forward and saw the disrespect Rin was showing Sesshomaru-sama he would be dead by default.

* * *

Rin was puffing, her hands were shaking. She could barely manage to pull the furs she would sleep on that night from Aun’s back. She spread them out under a large tree and proceeded to remove her kimono. She sighed looking at the tattered and frayed cloth. It was nothing like the sleek green silk it was before. Rin winced as the material came off her shoulders revealing small scrapes. She could hear annoyed growls behind her and the felling of a few trees, he could deal with his anger, she thought to herself. Her mind was racing, something had happened between Sesshomaru and Touma, before. Something that now put her and her unborn child in danger. Before Rin removed her inner layer, she wrapped a towel around her mid-section. Her stomach protrude from the middle of the towel making it awkward to stay completely covered.

“Here,” she heard Sesshomaru say behind her. Her katana was in his hand.

“You can put it on the furs,” she brushed passed him. She could sense his confusion. He set it down reluctantly, _I won’t even give him that much. Pathetic attempt to try to read my feelings. He should know how I feel. _

Rin shivered, it was cold. Winter storms would be coming soon. She untied her hair and slowly plucked the twigs out. This part of the river was like a grove. They had privacy through the branches and she fully intended on taking a nap as soon as she was clean. Rin heard the clunk of Sesshomaru’s armor hitting the ground and the thud of his swords. He removed his obi and opened his haori exposing his chest. That chest, she blushed looking at it, as angry as she was, she had spent a great deal of time against that chest in the last seven months. The pregnancy surprised and frightened Rin, it came so quickly. Kaede had explained to Rin what happens between men and women when they wed and how it creates a baby, but Rin did not believe it would happen so quickly for her. Sesshomaru never said it to her but she knew he felt the same. They barely began to explore their changing feelings for each other and now this child bound them together. She walked to Aun and took off a bucket she kept strapped to his side for her to wash with. She leaned over the rock, awkwardly and filled it with the cool water from the running river. He was watching her, she could feel Sesshomaru’s eyes following her.

Rin gasped feeling her stomach. She breathed a sigh of relief now that she felt a small kick. It felt like popcorn next to her belly button. _I’m glad, you’re still alive. Your strong like your father. _Sesshomaru was noble and beautiful, and she did love him, but he was also arrogant and Rin was not in the position to fight as she had in the past. It made her vulnerable and feel helpless. Rin folded her knees Indian style on the large rock she sat on grateful that it was bathed in what remained of the sunlight. It kept her legs warm while she prepared to bathe the smell of Touma off her body.

She felt him sit down next to her. Rin moved away from him. Sesshomaru watched Rin, he had tried everything he could think of to try to understand how she was feeling. It was apparent she was mad at him, or else she would not have had the gall to strike his face, an insult no one else would have been able to live after. For reasons he did not understand, his love for her outweighed the insult of the slap. Sesshomaru thought that his presence should have comforted Rin, not angered her. He leaned over to try to catch the scent of her neck, immediately he felt his face shoved back by the same angry hand that had collided with him before. He could no longer hold in his anger, he grabbed her by both shoulders and pulled her to his bare chest. He inhaled deeply the small valley between her ear and shoulder, _anger, sorrow and fear._ “Why are you still scared?”

She elbowed him in the stomach and went on all fours trying to pull herself up to walk away from him, but he was immediately hovering above her. Did she not understand how he felt? Seeing Touma hold her over the rocks and then watch her body plummet, he feared the worst. Sesshomaru was unsure how to say it, he hovered over her as she turned on all fours. His chest was against her back, his breath near her neck. He ran his hand inside the towel, over her stomach and down her hips. She was beautiful, her body was perfect, even more so with her stomach full. He needed to be within her.

“What are you doing?” Rin’s voice trembled.

“Making love to you,” he removed his hikama and entered her from behind, enjoying the deep folds of warm skin that enveloped his manhood. He felt her shaking beneath him as he ran one hand up the towel wrapped around her waist and gently fondled her breasts, rolling her nipples in one finger.

Rin’s body tightened, shocked. Her hands shook trying to hold herself up. She was still upset with his carelessness, having him take her so quickly without warning left her quaking. She was still afraid, afraid Touma would find them. And now of all times, Sesshomaru was kissing her neck in the most tender of places, making goosebumps fly up her arms, while she felt him settle within her. For a moment he rest his hand on her swollen belly. Rin tried to focus on breathing. Her body felt hot, she could feel herself becoming wet with desire for him.

“Let me comfort you.” He leaned his head over and gently kissed her neck, and trailed kisses down her back, noting the notches in her spine with his tongue. Sesshomaru clamped down on her left shoulder leaving an imprint of teeth and then kissed the marks he left behind. He used his right hand to turn her face to his and deeply kiss her lips. Sesshomaru opened the towel that covered her and removed it from her body allowing the heat of his chest to rest on her back. He caressed her back and shoulders and rested his head on her neck panting warm air onto her shoulders.

When he felt her body relax under his weight just slightly, the same hand travelled down between her legs and slowly stroked her clit sending waves of pleasure rushing between her legs like a raging river. Rin shivered at his touch, “Mmmh…oh,” she moaned for him. He had learned quickly how to make her body tremble in pleasure. As he heard another soft moan escape her lips, he began rocking his hips against hers, slowly moving in and out of her heat. He kissed the small of her neck, he joyed in watching her arms tremor as waves of pleasure emanated from where his fingers danced lightly. Rin’s hands attempted to grip the stone she was on as the pleasure increased. She felt guilty for her anger, knowing how deeply he cared for her.

“Sesshomaru,” her back arched into his thrusts. He watched as tears fell from her eyes onto the white stone. She was panting, taking in the full force of his body. He rest his face next to hers, kissing her mouth.

“Am I hurting you?” He asked her.

“No,” Rin could barely speak through the ecstasy he was providing her with.

“Do you want me to stop?”

Rin’s eyes shed a river of tears that soaked her trembling hands, “no.” Slowly she widened her legs allowing him to plunge himself deeper with in her, and her hips followed his. “Why?” Was all she could get out.

Sesshomaru breathed deeply letting her scent wash over him. She smelled of arousal and finally the comfort that he had wanted to give her. He paused for a moment to stop himself from finishing. Straining he asked, “Rin, look at me,” he used one hand to move her face to his, “I will not lose you.”

Rin nodded her head and lost herself in the pleasure and warmth of his body that surrounded hers. His body was melded into hers. She felt the heat of his chest against her back, the waves of pleasure radiating from her thighs, it was as if he was pulling the fear and anger that had permeated her being from her body with each stroke.

He continued rubbing between her legs with one hand while steadying himself with the other. Sesshomaru gazed at his left arm, there were days he still marveled that it had regenerated, now he could use it for more than killing, he could use it to make Rin feel loved. It was if he was saying with the deep movements of his hips reaching into Rin that she was safe now, she did not need to fear. He felt his hips tensing, he could feel her pulsing. He strained to stop himself from finishing. Sesshomaru wanted this moment to last. He changed from stimulating her to holding her around the waist, pressing her back to his chest, and kissing the line down her back slowly and gently, “Rin,” he moaned as he felt himself finish. “I felt your fear,” he whispered in her ear, his body shivered against hers, _my own heart nearly stopped_. He needed to feel close to her, he continued holding her back to his chest, slowly breathing in her scent, finding comfort in her warmth, “I’m sorry, I am arrogant and that arrogance put you in danger.”

They both needed a few minutes to catch their breath. He slid from her back and gazed lovingly at Rin. Rin’s eyes were dilated and light with ecstasy. Her stomach had grown immensely in the last few weeks. Sesshomaru put his Hikama back on and helped Rin put the towel back over her body. She sat on her knees, staring at the river as it rushed past them. He invited her into his embrace and to the relief of his heart, she complied this time, wiping tears from her eyes. She snuggled into his chest, still sitting Indian style, with her shoulder and half her back curved into him. “Why are you crying?” He helped remove her tears.

“I was really scared,” she whispered, “and I’m really pregnant,” she rubbed her bump. “My shoulder hurts,” she rubbed her annoying left shoulder. It always seemed to ache, more so the larger her stomach became.

He moved the hair from over her shoulders and rubbed the heel of his hand against the shoulder, “it never healed.”

“No,” she sighed, “never.” She rest her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. “This isn’t helping,” she ran her nails along her stomach.

“Have you felt him move since?” Sesshomaru gingerly touched her growing stomach. The bond with the sword was a blessing and a curse, it allowed him to know where she was but when her emotions became intense, they seeped into him like a disease, clouding his own thought.

“You still think it’s a son?” Rin glanced back at his golden eyes, they were full of worry and concern, “yes…**_she_** has moved.” Rin hung her head down, “I’m cold.” She scooted closer to him taking advantage of his warm body.

Sesshomaru wrapped Rin inside the warmth of his mokomoko and held her closely. He sniffed her neck, she was still fearful. He rested one hand against her stomach, hoping to feel for himself the life that he had helped to create. His mind was racing. They would not light a fire tonight, it would act as a beacon. He needed to clean and seal the cuts on her face to ensure the scent of her blood didn’t attract unwanted guests. He slowly kissed them, one by one, knowing that his saliva would speed her healing process. He glanced over her body, she wasn’t injured anywhere else that he could tell. Her neck still had bruises. He nuzzled the marks affectionately.

“Sometimes you are too quiet Sesshomaru, and I don’t know what you are thinking,” she said quietly relaxing in his arms.

“Sometimes you are too angry and don’t give this Sesshomaru a chance to speak.”

“So, you thought making love to me would make up for it?” She had a smile on her face.

“I know that I bring you comfort. I feel it when you are wearing the sword, the panic fades, a comfort washes over you, so strong I feel it in myself.” He brushed her hair over shoulder and placed a soft kiss where her collar bone met her shoulder. “In the last seven months you have never denied me knowledge of your feelings,” he touched his cheek where she had hit him, “you have never struck at me out of anger before.” This wasn’t the first time she had hit him. Once she was well enough to move he was curious how powerful the sword Totosai made for her was. He encouraged her to use it full force on him. The sword had the power to make even him bleed and until they discovered her pregnancy he enjoyed pushing her to her limits in sparring matches. If she could battle him, she would be safe against almost any Yokai.

Rin turned to look him in the eyes, to lose herself in those golden eyes of his. She traced the stripes on his cheeks with her fingers, “were you even scared?” She felt on the verge of tears again. _Why am I always so emotional these days?_

He lifted one of her hands to his mouth and kissed it softly, “terrified. But you will not live, if you tell a soul that the this Sesshomaru felt fear. I have enjoyed having you with me. When your fear came through this strange connection with the sword, it nearly felt as if it were my own.” Sesshomaru looked at Rin’s stomach, it gave him a sense of pride, and exhilaration that he was responsible for what was within. He rest his chin on Rin’s shoulder and took a deep breath, this was not how he imagined bringing his child into the world. According to Rin there was only two months left, and he had not thought beyond what the next day would bring. He figured he would take her back to Kaede’s hut when she felt the child coming and as winter was fast approaching, they would most likely stay there to avoid the cold. During that time, something would need to be done about the connection between himself and Rin’s katana. During battle it was distracting, and while he faced Touma, all he could focus on, was Rin’s fear. He could not keep her safe, not like this.

As if reading his mind Rin spoke, “you can’t keep me safe, not this time. I can’t even keep myself safe.” Rin took out her brush and brushed the rest of the twigs from her hair. When she was finished, she tried to get up to wash her body only to have Sesshomaru pull her back down to his chest.

“Do not doubt this Sesshomaru,” he kissed her forehead, “I will protect what is mine.”

“Even you can’t be in two places at once,” Rin glanced a Bakusaiga that rested against a nearby tree. “It’s a powerful sword but so was Touma’s, and if he separates us again…” Rin ran her hands over her swollen belly, “I can’t move like I used to Sesshomaru. My movements are sloppy, I can barely run. My heart beats so fast I can’t hide. I hurt my ankle.” She rubbed the one that rolled.

He touched it lightly with the tips of his fingers and set his lips on her shoulder, “we will not separate again. Touma is a coward. He will want to draw you away from this Sesshomaru.”

“I’m hungry too,” she nipped at his collar bone pouting.

He tried not to laugh. Once before he had chuckled at one of her odd pregnancy cravings and she burst into tears, “I cannot hunt for you and guard you at the same time. Do we have anything left?”

“Nuts, berries, salted meat maybe,” she groaned holding her stomach, “I am tired of nuts and berries. I want hot soup.”

“No fire tonight,” he ran his claws through her hair. Sesshomaru growled under his breath. She spoke the truth. He wanted to smash every tree near him. Instead he ran his hands over Rin’s shoulders. _We should not have stopped. _“I can’t keep you safe if you don’t heed me,” Sesshomaru lifted up the bucket of water and dumped it on Rin’s head. “This wasn’t a safe place to stop.”

“That was cold!” She pushed herself off of him but was glad to be able to bathe. She took the soap and quickly wiped down her arms and legs before filling the wooden bucket again with river water. Rin attempted to lift it up and dump it on top of Sesshomaru, only for him to grab her wrists and turn it back on her. He was laughing but now Rin was shivering. Her toes were turning purple. She hugged herself and gave him an annoyed look. Sesshomaru walked towards her and held out one of his arms to walk her back to the bed of furs when Rin saw that he was hurt.

Rin’s eyes widened, “you’re hurt!” Sesshomaru had blisters up one side of his arm, and across his entire back.

He looked at his back, annoyed, “it’s nothing.” It stung but he knew it would heal in a matter of hours.

Rin took him by the arm, “I have a salve I can put on it from Jinenji, it’s made for Yokai.”

“It’s unnecessary,” he tried to walk away, but Rin refused to release his arm. Sesshomaru sat back down annoyed, “you make this Sesshomaru weak.”

Rin quickly ran to her bag and pulled out the salve. She rubbed it slowly over his arm and across his back. Her feet danced against the rocks beneath her trying to warm themselves. Sesshomaru was loathe to admit that his back felt instant relief and that his skin quickly returned to its normal color. Rin grabbed Sesshomaru by the hair and pulled his head back to look into his eyes, “I love you.”

Those words. Those three words were like poison to his heart. If he did not feel the same, if the emotion did not cause such a fire inside of him, a warmth in his chest it would have been simple to walk away and remember that one such as himself would never lower themselves to being with a human. When he looked into her big brown eyes, he did not feel as though he had lowered himself, he felt comfort, warmth and desire. “As do I,” he answered her as she kissed him, he held the hand that had struck his face in his and looked into her eyes, “you owe me an apology.” His eyes intensified.

“I’m sorry, I was just so angry at you, did I hurt you?” She shivered from the cold.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow.

“That was a stupid question, I think we’ve established at this point that I can’t cause you injury. But I hurt your feelings and for that I am sorry,” Rin sighed, she didn’t know she could do that.

“Finish bathing,” Sesshomaru responded, “then rest.” Sesshomaru gave up moving them. Most days Rin needed to stop several times to rest. Flying always ended in her vomiting, a smell he could not tolerate. She slept more during the day and tossed at night trying to find a comfortable position.

Rin laughed, “you still think you get to order me around?” Her arms were folded around herself and her lips were turning blue.

Sesshomaru stood up and took her hands in his, “I told you this is not a safe space to stop, rest quickly, we leave in a few hours. We will not stop again until I find a safe space. Touma will not attack you directly as long as I am near. You’re freezing.”

Rin ran to her bag that had her other kimono in it. She wouldn’t waste her time with sleepwear tonight knowing that they would soon leave. She threw it over her shoulder, then rummaged for some socks. “Why does he hate you so much?”

“I took his eye over two centuries ago in battle.” He picked up his obi and retied Bakusaiga and Tenseiga to his waist.

Rin pursed her lips, “I should have known that injury was caused by you. But you were never angry after Inuyasha took your arm. Why did he hold onto his anger?” She finished dressing and walked over to the bed of furs. She awkwardly lowered herself down and lay on her side struggling to find comfort.

“I don’t know,” Sesshomaru answered. He stalked over to the furs and lay down against Rin’s back. He kissed her neck softly, “enough questions. Sleep.”

“How am I supposed to sleep?” Rin’s mind was racing with the events of the day. Her sides were sore, and she felt as if the child within her had no more room to grow. “I’m so uncomfortable.” She reached behind Sesshomaru and grabbed his mokomoko.

He raised his eyebrows at her.

“I’m uncomfortable,” she tugged on it.

“It is a part of my body,” he moved closer to her.

“That you can grow a second one and adjust the length at will. I’m cold because you dumped water on me and my muscles ache! Great now I’m going to cry again.” Brown eyes stared back at him hurt, with red around the edges and shivering hands.

“What did this Sesshomaru say?” He asked her. It was ridiculous these days, her emotions were erratic, he could hardly keep up with them. “Are you crying?”

“No,” she sobbed, shivering into his mokomoko.

“You are crying,” he tickled her chin, “give me your lips,” he pulled her face out of his fluff and kissed her deeply.

“Please,” she choked out, “tell me you love me?”

“Are my actions deficient? Is my love not apparent?” He really didn’t understand her.

“Please?” She begged him.

“I love you Rin,” he snaked his arm around her chest and pulled her closer to him, “I love you.” She stopped trembling, the sobs turned to snivels. He gently stroked her shoulder, but her eyes were wide open, despite her exhaustion “I will remain awake, you needn’t fear. Sleep my heart.”

“Sesshomaru?”

“Hmm?”

“I want to go back to the Kaede-sama’s village,” Rin took one of Sesshomaru’s hands in hers.

“Now?” Sesshomaru felt a twinge of pain in his heart, did she really not trust him to protect her?

“Not now…but when it’s closer to when the baby comes. A woman should be surrounded by people who love her when a baby is born,” she turned to look him in the eyes, “and I don’t think you or Jaken know how to help a woman birth a child.”

A small chuckle escaped Sesshomaru’s tense lips.

“Winter is coming soon, it won’t be safe to travel with a baby.”

“Sleep,” he told her again. His mind was already on his prey. If he had been alone, he would have been hunting already. If Rin had been a child, having her tag along would not have stopped him. What stopped him now, was that there was something he had to lose and if she felt the same intense fear, it would become a distraction. Sesshomaru would not put Rin or their child at any further risk. Sesshomaru slid one arm under Rin’s head, “close your eyes.” He stroked her cheek with his finger. She complied. He waited for Rin to finally nod off and her breathing to become deep and even before he stood up. He pulled his haori back on and walked towards where Jaken was alone. Sesshomaru needed to find a safe space to leave Rin, somewhere she could protect herself if needed and have someone more stalwart than Jaken to guard her.

Jaken had wrapped his injuries and was now seeing to the injuries that Touma’s ogres had left on Aun. “Send for Inuyasha.”

“Sesshoumaru-sama, won’t Touma be expecting that?” Jaken asked meekly, he was not eager for another one of Sesshomaru-sama’s moods.

“Tell him to meet me by goshinboku at sunrise. Jaken,” Sesshomaru turned towards the cowering creature, “put this on your wounds.” Sesshomaru threw the salve that Rin had put on his back. _Faithful to the end this creature. _

“Sesshomaru!!” He heard her voice from the grove where he had left her. It sounded desperate. “Ow,” she was curled into a ball by the time he got back to her.

He knelt down behind her, “what is it?”

“Contraction,” she whined, “it’s too soon. I can’t…I need to sleep, I’m so tired. Hold me, please.”

He laid down behind her and held her closely, “shh, calm down, just breathe with me. Breathe,” he helped her rest her head against the crook of his shoulder again. He pulled the furs over her shoulder and rubbed her back.

“It’s too soon,” she whispered, holding her stomach until the pain left her.

“Try to sleep,” he felt a primal need to be near her, protect her. He sighed next to her ear, “is it time?”

“I don’t think so,” she rubbed the underside of her bump, “stress…it can bring labor on early. I miss being able to sleep with you next to my front,” she laughed quietly.

“Your stomach is too big. We can only make love in two positions comfortably,” he reminded her. He ran his finger down the center of her back. “Will you know?”

“I don’t know. I’ve delivered enough babies I should. Each labor is different though, every woman is different. It’s probably just stress,” she curled her shoulder into his chest, “closer. Stay next to me. Please?”

He looped his feet around hers. He kissed the back of her neck and wrapped his mokomoko around her for warmth, “try to sleep.”

* * *

Kagome sat with her three children around the fire. Izayoi was three, Taisho five and Sota seven. She pointed to words on a book asking the two boys what the words were. She was determined even though they were being raised in this era to ensure that they were educated. Izayoi kicked her feet back and forth as she lay on her stomach, listening to the other two chop through their work. They had finished the last of the harvest before beginning the long process of turning down the gardens for the winter time. Inuyasha sat in the corner holding Tetsusaiga deep in thought. He clawed at the ground then his eyes shot up, “what the hell?”

“What is it?” Kagome stood up. She ran to the wall feeling yoki approach and pulled out her bow and arrow.

“It’s Jaken and Aun, they’re both injured,” Inuyasha stood up. He opened the door just in time to see the double headed dragon landing. “Oi Jaken, what the hell are you doing here?”

Jaken ran towards their hut, more limping than running and nearly fell on his face. Kagome ran to him, “these injuries are awful,” she said.

He slapped her hands off of him, “don’t touch this Jaken. Inuyasha…Sesshomaru-sama has sent me to ask you to help him. Rin is in danger, he asks that you meet him by goshinboku at sunrise.”

“What?” Inuyasha questioned him. “Why does the great Sesshomaru-sama,” he mocked his brother, “need me?”

“Inuyasha,” Kagome warned him, “he said Rin is danger, Aun is hurt too. Go to him. Don’t wait for him to come here.”

“What does he want?” Inuyasha asked Jaken.

“I assume he will want you to guard Rin, while he hunts Touma, the dog demon that has been attacking them. He separated Rin and I from Sesshomaru-sama,” Jaken fumbled through his words.

“Rin doesn’t need protecting,” Inuyasha scoffed, “but if he is asking for me. It must be serious. I’ll go, Taisho, go get Sango and Miroku. Tell them to follow me. I’ll go ahead. Jaken stay here. Which way?”

“East,” Jaken pointed, “um…Touma is a dangerous enemy, if you help, your families may be in danger.”

“We’ll deal with it,” Kagome said, “Sota, run and get Jinenji. Jaken come in, I’ll treat your injuries.”


	3. Refuge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Touma attacks again and surrounds Rin and Sesshomaru. Escape seems unlikely.

After two hours of Rin sleeping quietly on the furs, he took her katana, tied it around her waist in her sleep and hoisted her into his arms. He didn’t bother with waking her, she was exhausted and he knew it. The movement caused her eyes to flutter. His lips on hers was all she needed to fall back to sleep against his chest. He looked down at her almond shaped face as it curled into his mokomoko. There was something invigorating about that feeling, knowing that by merely being in the same breathing space as she, she would feel safe and sleep limply in his arms. He knew she was depleted of energy. The two attacks within a matter of days zapped her of her strength. She warned him of the dangers of pushing her body that hard, early labor, bleeding, loss of the child, or her life. The thoughts surfing through his mind made him hold Rin closer to him. If that was even possible. “I will protect you my heart,” for a moment he rest his cheek against her forehead. He saw little feet struggling through her kimono and smiled, before flying into the air. He allowed himself the pleasure of feeling the writhing body within her, “be strong. I will end this tonight.”

His eyes were on the moon, in the direction of Goshinboku. He soared in the air regally with his held high with pride. Rin was right about one thing, he could not be in two places at once, and if the goal was to separate them, then Rin’s life would be in danger. If she were not pregnant, he would worry less. She would defend herself or retreat. She was not as weak as some thought, but in her current state, her movements were clumsy at best.

He knew she was tired, two attacks in a matter of days. It was as if Touma was testing them, seeing how strong they were together and apart. As Sesshomaru flew, he assumed Touma’s end goal would be to end Rin’s life to cause Sesshomaru pain. _I will not let that happen. _

The sun slowly began to rise as Rin felt cool air against her face. She opened her eyes only long enough to notice that she was in Sesshomaru’s arms. His face was like a rock. His eyes intense, sharp and focused. She went to adjust herself and felt him immediately stop in the air. His eyes softened only a little as he looked down at her. Rin wondered what he was thinking. If she could reach her katana she would know what he was feeling. It was like a small window into his soul.

Suddenly, Rin felt a sharp jolt. Something came flying past them almost knocking her out of his arms. Sesshomaru cursed and immediately descended, twisting and turning as he did, dodging additional blows. Rin held onto his neck trying to swallow the sickness that was rising from her stomach. Another blast came at them. Sesshomaru landed roughly on the forest floor. He threw himself over Rin as a blast of lightening came down. He gripped Tenseiga faster this time darkening his view with the black barrier, “dammit,” he stood up and smelled the air. He could tell that Touma was close by. “Come out Touma! Only a coward attacks when someone’s back is turned.” Sesshomaru’s nostrils flared. He held her arm, certain not to be separated from her this time. He forced her behind his right shoulder, “stay behind me,” he whispered.

Rin drew her own Katana, she would not be taken lightly this time. Pregnant or not, she would be ready to defend herself. She just wished her hand would steady itself and her stomach would stop churning. _I feel like I’m going to be sick again. _She covered her mouth.

“Now why would I do that? Did I interrupt a moment, between you and your hanyou carrying girlfriend?” His voice was high pitched and sing song, he was enjoying making them nervous. It sounded like it was coming from behind a large bunch of tall green trees.

Sesshomaru’s grip tightened on Rin’s forearm.

“I know,” she said, her hand gripped her sword, _I won’t do anything stupid, I couldn’t even if I wanted to. _She could feel his fury and his concern.

Sesshomaru was tense, he could smell Yokai behind him. At least five were Inu-yokai. Somewhere there were more ogres, and ahead he could smell Touma. If he wasn’t careful Rin would get caught in the crossfire between his sword and Touma’s. He kept one hand on Rin’s arm ready to pull her out of the way. They would not be separated this time.

The sky darkened to black and a circle of clouds began to form. They swirled sickeningly making Rin dizzy. A cyclone was forming above their heads waiting to fall on top of them.

“And here you thought your katana was the most powerful,” Touma laughed, “lookout Sesshomaru.”

A blast of air came flying down on top of them. Sesshomaru grabbed Rin and quickly dodged the typhoon. It continued to chase them, smashing cylindrical tentacles into the forest floor. It was driving them closer to the Yokai behind them, at each moment he tried to move forward another blast came and pushed him back. He could neither fly nor escape. Rin could do nothing but hold on for her life, and close her eyes hoping that the spinning sensation in her stomach would stop before she was on her knees covered in vomit. Sesshomaru drew Bakusaiga and unleashed it’s green glow into the trees ahead of him. He smelled only the slightest hint of Touma’s blood but was satisfied when the cyclone rose off the ground, giving them the smallest reprieve. He had to get Rin out of there, so he could fight without being distracted. He kept Rin by his side where his tail wrapped around his shoulder to shield her. Where it usually rest down to the ground it was raised across her chest and stomach to block any blows that might come.

Rin’s heart was pounding, she was unsure how much more of this she could take. She felt her stomach twinging again. The child inside of her did not like these attacks.

“Calm yourself,” Sesshomaru ordered her. Rin’s panic was washing into the bond and seeping into his consciousness.

“Whew, if I couldn’t smell her, I would find her by the fear in her heart. You like the damsels in distress don’t you?” Touma was cackling from his hiding place.

Rin took a deep breath. They were surrounded. There was nowhere for them to go. As if in a small fog Rin remembered, she still had two pouches left from Jinenji that could deaden the sight and smell of the Yokai. “Sesshomaru,” she moved her hand down to his and placed one of the pouches in it, “aim for the stronger ones. Just make sure to cover your nose and eyes. It’s less potent after two minutes.”

_Clever girl, _he took the pouch in his free hand.

“Kongo Soha!!” Adamantite spears came from the side and flew directly at the Inu-Yokai flanking them. Inuyasha came flying out of the bushes and landed in front of Rin. He stood at the ready, sword raised back to back with Sesshomaru. “You’re surrounded, Sesshomaru.” 

Sesshomaru scoffed, he already knew that. He was holding back for Rin’s sake. Sesshomaru took the pouch and threw it directly at the area where he knew Touma was. “Cover your nose Inuyasha!” He yelled. “Take Rin and go! Now!” He pushed her at Inuyasha.

Rin’s heart pinched in pain. She knew he was right, but something about being pregnant was making her feel weak and vulnerable. He didn’t glance back, Sesshomaru didn’t wait to see if Inuyasha had her. He quickly ripped a piece of his haori and covered his nose, flying above the green mist towards Touma. He could hear Touma hissing in pain. He would finish his prey off tonight.

Inuyasha ran over to Rin, “come on get on my ba-…” Inuyasha’s eyes widened at the sight of her stomach, “um…”

“Cover your nose and eyes,” Rin threw a second pouch towards the Inu-Yokai that had blocked them in. Inuyasha grabbed Rin around her very large waist and jumped high into the air above the green mist. He kept one arm over his face. As soon as he began to descend, he landed on Kirara with Sango. “Shouldn’t you stay and help Sesshomaru?” Sango asked. “Hiraikotsu!” She aimed at the Inu-Yokai who were writhing on the ground. They jumped out of the way dodging it.

“No,” Inuyasha looked down as a huge blast of Bakusaiga crushed the trees, “no, looking at Rin now, I know why he sent for me. She can’t defend herself like this. Get me out of here before this stuff gets on me.” Inuyasha kept his nose covered. His eyes barely peaked out from the robe of the fire rat.

Rin gazed back where Bakusaiga was flashing. She sheathed her katana and took a moment to take in Sesshomaru’s emotions, he was raging, but he was still alive. Not that she believed he wouldn’t be. She wanted to at least be able to say goodbye. They hadn’t been apart from each other in seven months. There was no conversation beyond her sleeping. They flew through the dark sky, Kirara’s paws burning in fire. 

“Where are we going?” Rin held onto Sango’s back.

“Somewhere safe,” Sango said quietly, “we can talk freely when we are there. Inuyasha are they following?”

The hanyou lifted up his nose and closed his golden eyes, “I don’t smell them.”

Rin glanced at Inuyasha behind her. He was staring at her stomach. His eyes were wide with shock. She glared back at him knowing exactly what he was thinking. “Does _Sesshomaru-sama_ know he’s going to have a hanyou?” Sarcasm dripped from his mouth.

Rin punched him in the shoulder, “I knew you were going to say that. You should be happy to be an uncle.”

Sango took a moment to take in Rin’s shape, but before she had a chance, the second front attacked. “Go Kirara!” Sango yelled. Ogres rose from the forest floors gnashing their teeth and batting at Kirara who dodged them deftly and swiftly. She flew between the snail like hands of one, then through the legs of another.

Rin kept her head low while Sango held onto her wrist to steady her. Inuyasha draw Tetsusaiga from its sheathe and stared at the ten-ogre approaching. “What are Inu-Yokai doing with ogres? I can take them. Meido Zangetzha!” He yelled sending tens of blades of the dark night sky blades at the Ogres. They fell to pieces in only moments. “We have to get to the cave before anyone else comes to join the party. Oi Rin, who was that guy taunting Sesshomaru anyway?”

“I don’t really know. Sesshomaru called him Touma. They fought once, centuries ago. Sesshomaru took his eye. Touma said he would make Sesshomaru pay now that he had something to lose.” The words were biting this time. Rin gripped her stomach defensively, “he meant me.”

“Yes,” Inuyasha put a hand on her shoulder, “he did mean you and the baby. It is his isn’t it?” His voice was softer than Rin had ever heard it before.

Rin nodded and watched as Sesshomaru’s flashes of green light faded into the distance. _Come back to me, my love. _She gripped Kirara’s fur in her fingers. The cat meowed uncomfortably.

Inuyasha set his hand on Rin’s shoulder, “he’ll be okay. He’s battled worse.”

Rin nodded.

* * *

He knew Rin was safe. Her emotions were stable now. She was tickled by something. He felt in the back of his head but his mind was consumed by finding where Touma had run off to. The green powder was extremely effective. It completely neutralized the Inu-Yokai behind him. Most of them fled. He could hear trees crashing as they did. Once he knew Rin was gone, he released a wave of Bakusaiga flattening the forest around him. Trees blew to pieces, loads of bark and leaves littered the air. Birds bodies fell in agony. Touma’s body was not among the debris. He cursed.

It did however take down several Inu-yokai. He did not recognize them. He did the emblem they wore on their left shoulder. It was in the shape of a rival clan who had despised his father. He heard a twig snap behind him and quickly turned. Touma’s scent was gone and if he wasn’t careful his own would be affected by the mist. He glided into the air to get a better view of who or what was left.

To the distance as Rin was escaping, he saw meido blades crash into ogres. He would not let the feeling of relief touch his face. The muscles in his shoulders and stomach loosened. She would be safe now and he could hunt Touma down and kill him. _Touma…bastard._ What had happened, happened during battle. It did not merit two centuries of anger, nor the threat to Rin’s life. Sesshomaru looked towards the east and resumed flying. Touma’s scent was faint. It was tainted with the putrid smell of the powder. At least for a few days, Touma and the Yokai following him would not be able to track Rin.

* * *

Kirara landed inside a dark cave. It was nestled against a flat field, but high in the mountain. There was a steep hill to climb up to it. Japanese Pisceas reached for the skies outside the mouth of the cave. She almost thought she could hear the rushing waters of the river nearby. Rin recognized the markings of the land. She was a few days from Kaede’s village. The flowers were beginning to wilt with the signs of winter and the sky was grey. The entrance looked plain enough but as they walked further in, Rin saw Kagome and Miroku. Sango hugged Rin tightly and gave a pat to Rin’s stomach. Rin ran to Kagome and wrapped her arms around her squeezing her close. “I missed you,” Rin smiled. “It’s been so long. I’ve needed a woman to talk to.”

Kagome took in Rin’s form while holding her arms, “apparently it has. Jaken has been filling us in on what happened. I almost didn’t believe that you and O-ni-sama have been…”

“Seriously?” Inuyasha glared at Kagome, “stop calling him that.”

“I told them nothing. If I know what’s good for me!” Jaken sat stiffly against the wall of the cave. “Sending this Jaken to hapless humans for help.”

Rin ignored Jaken and rolled her eyes. “Where are the children?” Rin wondered. They had all come but none of the children were in the cave.

“With Koga and Ayame in the mountains. When Jaken came we sent them with Shippo and Kohaku,” Miroku responded. “We were informed there could be trouble for them. Koga was more than happy to take them. Something about not owing muttface any more favors for saving his life when they fought Naraku.”

Rin hung her head at the sound of Kohaku’s name, “how is he? Kohaku?”

“Inuyasha, Miroku, why don’t you go to the stream we saw coming up here and catch some fish?” Kagome suggested pushing on Inuyasha’s shoulders.

“Why? I want to hear all about my brother the pure-blooded demon fathering a hanyou,” Inuyasha folded his arms and crossed his legs in defiance.

“O-Su-wa…” Kagome started. Her grin dimpled her cheeks.

“Okay, we’ll go!” Inuyasha grabbed Miroku by the arm. “You better tell me everything though Kagome.”

“O-…” She repeated.

“I’m going!” Inuyasha and Miroku ran from the cave.

“Kohaku is fine, he is getting married soon,” Sango told Rin, “he was broken hearted when you left. He told us about what happened between you and Sesshomaru last year, what he saw from the bushes, and how it strained your relationship. He understands why you chose to stay away. But I don’t think any of us expected this. I thought perhaps Sesshomaru went to find you because he was worried, not because he felt more than a fatherly affection. That is until Kohaku explained what he saw.” Sango sighed, “I’m happy for you though. We all knew that you felt more for him.”

Rin nodded understanding. She hadn’t told anyone about her first encounter with Sesshomaru although, she knew that Inuyasha had known. It took months for Kohaku to even look at her again. Which added even more hurt. Rin wasn’t even sure then what had happened between herself and Sesshomaru. It started and ended so quickly, leaving her with a heat between her legs that lasted for weeks and confusion in her heart. It wasn’t until he came back a year later and helped her defeat the snake demons that they both seemed to finally understand what their hearts were telling them. She took a deep breath feeling like she could relax for the first time in days. The cave didn’t make the best place to relax in. The ground was hard against her bottom and she was still exhausted. Soft dripping of water fell around them. She glanced up at the black and brown rock formations. They looked like teeth, spiking around the cave. “How is everyone, Jinenji-san, Kaede-sama?” She changed the subject.

“They are well,” Sango laughed, “now down to business,” she touched Rin’s stomach, “well?”

“What?” Rin laughed. She knew what they wanted but felt embarrassed answering such personal and intimate questions. Sesshomaru wouldn’t even let Jaken near their fire at night. Rin thought more than once to get the little Kappi a mate so he wouldn’t sit alone by his fire. It months for her to get used to the fact that he probably heard every detail of their private conversations and the sounds she made.

“It’s Sesshomaru’s isn’t it?” Kagome smiled gleefully. Although she was now in her mid-twenties and mother to three children, there was still a warm child-likeness to her. “I never thought he would have changed so much to be with a human.”

Rin nodded her head with a big smile on her face. “He has never been as heartless as he seems. I know you told me what he was like before he met me as a child, but I’ve always seen his kindness. And yes, it’s his.”

“No wonder he asked Inuyasha to come. We were confused at first, we know you can defend yourself just fine,” Kagome sighed sitting down next to Rin. “I’m so excited! I always wanted to be an aunt. My brother is eighteen but he won’t marry for years. He wants to be a doctor.” Kagome’s eyes glazed over, knowing that Sango and Rin had no idea what she was talking about. She waved it off and said nothing more.

“How far along are you?” Sango was practically jumping with excitement.

“I think I have two months more to go,” Rin answered happily stroking her stomach, “he’s convinced that it’s a boy.” Little legs pushed against her rib cage. She sighed again.

“They always want a boy first,” Sango laughed, “lucky for us we got twin girls first just to spite Miroku. Now come on…stop being so stingy with the details.”

“Details?” Rin giggled covering her mouth. “What details?”

“What is he like in bed?” Sango asked.

Rin blushed an even deeper shade of red, “amazing.” She whispered, “just…wow. I can’t say more than that.”

“How much did it hurt?” Sango inquired, “Miroku and I were both virgins. Can you believe he was the way he was and never actually bedded a woman? He was always so scared he would pass on Naraku’s curse. It was ok…it’s better now that we’ve had so much time together.”

Rin played with the soles of her boots, “amazing,” she repeated herself. She failed to mention that the bonding process was rather painful because Sesshomaru was feral. That was the only word she could think of. It was like something else took hold of him, something neither one of them understood and didn’t speak about. Until he did it was magical and every interaction after that. She melted into his arms and his mouth like butter on a skillet. He made her blood boil, and kami she was getting hot and bothered just thinking about him.

A look of surprise and shock crossed Kagome’s face, “Rin-chan, you said you have two more months, when was your last cycle?”

Rin laughed at both of them asking her these questions. “I never had one after he came to me. After the fight was over, he told me he loved me, and then…well…we made love and it never came. I knew I was pregnant a month or so later because I was late and I was sick all the time.”

“You made love with a demon?” Sango’s eyes dilated and her cheeks flushed, “it’s so romantic I never thought of him as the type to be romantic. Miroku refused to touch me until we were married…at least more than grabbing my backside. Come to think of it, it would have been nice before, but don’t tell Kaede I said that. Something to relieve the tension of fighting Naraku.”

“Rin, if that was the first time, I don’t think you have as much time until this child is born as you think you do.” Kagome was far less enthused as Sango was. Sango nudged Kagome to try to get her into the spirit of the conversation.

“Come on Kagome, stop being so serious. Now Rin really is a woman, and we don’t have to have those awkward moments where we hide what happens with our husband’s at night. Not that the whole village doesn’t hear you and Inuyasha.”

“Sango!” Kagome yelled. She would have tackled her to the ground but Rin was in the way. “Besides this is serious. Rin, yokai children don’t need as long in the womb to form and mature. The stronger the Yoki the earlier the birth. Sota was only in my stomach for eight months and came out looking like he had been in for ten. Taisho, he was in the longest and Izayoi, barely met eight months and that’s with only a quarter Yokai. You’re carrying the child of a powerful Inu-Yokai. Inuyasha said that his mother only carried him seven months. If seven months ago was the first time you and Sesshomaru were intimate, I wouldn’t be surprised if your baby doesn’t come any day now.”

Rin suddenly felt ill. “Any day now?” She wasn’t ready. She had no space for the baby. They had no plan beyond returning to the village for the winter and Rin wasn’t even sure if Sesshomaru would stay with her. He was nomadic by nature, and not used to staying in one place for long. She felt the worry washing over her. She tried to stop it knowing that it would feed into the sword and distract Sesshomaru, if she felt it too strongly. Sesshomaru lived for battle, for finding and defeating powerful Yokai. She held her stomach, “now?” Her eyes were wide as globes. She imagined the baby being born on the floor of the cave.

“Well not this minute, but soon. I’ll send Miroku back to Kaede-sama to get herbs and extra blankets and some supplies. We should be prepared just in case.” Kagome put a hand on Rin’s shoulder. “Have you felt anything? Any tightening in your stomach?”

“No, well I think so. I don’t know,” Rin answered. “I thought I felt something yesterday when we were attacked and after I had a bad pain, but just one. But I was running for my life, they separated us on purpose and then I became the target.” Rin rubbed her eyes, “I’ve barely slept in days.”

“Stress can do that. We have to try to keep you relaxed from now on,” Sango encouraged Rin. She glanced back at the dark, dank cave, “this doesn’t look like the right place to give birth to a child.”

Rin took the sword off, then burst into tears. She hid her eyes in her hands and sobbed feeling nauseas again. She couldn’t even raise her knees to her eyes because of her belly. “He can feel me through the sword. He can’t know how upset I am.”

“Why are you sad Rin? A child is a blessing.” Sango held Rin around her other side.

“Because he won’t be here! Because ever since that night we were together, he hasn’t left my side until now…and I didn’t even get a chance to say good-bye. He didn’t even tell me what his plan was. He just told me to go to sleep and the next thing I know, I wake up and we are getting typhoons shot at us from somewhere and then Inuyasha comes and now I’m here! Jaken!” She grabbed him by the collar, “what happened when I was sleeping?” In the background Kagome and Sango were snickering and whispering about hormones and mood changes during pregnancy.

“Sesshomaru-sama, felt you would get in the way of battle and sent me to retrieve Inuyasha to protect you. Before morning came Shippo took the children and left the village in case the Yokai would retaliate against them to Koga and we made a safe haven here so Sesshomaru-sama doesn’t have to worry about you in your pathetic, helpless current state.” Jaken picked up the Katana and held it out to Rin, “he will be even more worried, to feel nothing.”

Rin stared at the rocky ground of the cave, and at the sword she had taken off. She wiped her tears and took the sword, “thank you Jaken-sama.” She put it back on and held the hilt. He was focused now, _he must be searching for Touma. _“I don’t know how he does it. The world can be crashing down…” Rin didn’t realize she was speaking out loud.

“Rin?” Kagome asked.

“I can feel him. If I am holding the sword in my hand, he feels me as long as it is on my person. He can even tell where I am, just by sensing the direction. He said it was because the blood he used to seal the wound on my stomach from the bear demon.” The stomach that was now full with his child. They both looked at her confused, she just shook her head, “he put blood into a bad wound of mine when he caught up with me seven months ago. The bear injured my stomach.” Rin didn’t want to speak anymore, there were too many things in her head and she felt her stomach bubbling again, “I feel sick to my stomach.”

Kagome and Sango both hugged Rin tightly, “it will be ok, you’ll see. Sesshomaru-sama has many enemies, but he has never lost to them. This one won’t be any different.”

The sun was already bright in the sky. Rin awkwardly stood, thinking about what Kagome said, and wishing she knew where Sesshomaru was. She touched the hilt of the sword running her fingers over the muzzle of the dog affectionately. He was still out there, focused, his emotions more relaxed. Rin still felt tired.

Inuyasha and Miroku returned with fish for breakfast. Rin started heaving at the smell of them. She ran to the cave entrance and doubled over in the nearing bushes. When she was finished heaving water and the dinner she had only half eaten earlier, followed by acid bile, she took a deep breath and sat down at the mouth of the cave where she could enjoy some fresh air rather than feel suffocated by the disgusting smell of fish. She wished there was something more she could do. Something more than sitting there and waiting. She shivered, remembering that all of her things had been left behind. It had not even come to her mind six months ago when she retrieved her things from Kaede to take her warmer clothes. Not that they would fit now. She was cold.

Kagome walked up behind Rin and put an arm around her side, “I always feel helpless when I am pregnant too. You should see my aim, it gets worse and I trip on my own feet. Come, we brought one of your warmer Kimono’s but I’m not sure it will keep you any warmer. I’ll ask Inuyasha to bring one of mine from when I was pregnant. We have your boots too. Inuyasha says he smells snow coming. That’s a good thing. It will stifle our scent. You should probably try to sleep. It doesn’t sound like you’ve had much rest in the last few days. We’ll put down extra furs for you, so it’s more comfortable.”

Rin watched the sky. She felt emotional. The last seven months had been a whirlwind. She wasn’t even aware so much time had passed. After Sesshomaru came to her and they made love that first time, it was he who refused to leave her side, at first he claimed until she was healed but after that, he persisted to stay with her.

* * *

_ It was the strangest feeling that first morning to wake up next to him. Rin’s back still ached terribly but felt better than it had before she had soaked in the hot springs, she could move somewhat without crying out in pain. She was unsure how long she had slept this time, because when she woke the moon was shining above them again. Next to her she found a wooden water jug, figs, nuts, berries and cooked fish. She blinked and rubbed her eyes, wondering if she had dreamt Sesshomaru finding her against the tree, and if she had dreamt what had happened between them the other night. She felt a small soreness between her legs, and when she moved to get up, there was an arm striped with purple draped over her waist. One of her legs was tangled against someone else. She turned to see that Sesshomaru was in a deep sleep. She was still on his mokomoko. She noticed that his haori was laid over both of them. It did little to cover their legs, only her top. When she lifted it up, Rin blushed. He was still naked and so was she. Her clothes were folded next to her head within arm’s reach. His hair seemed perfectly splayed around him, and his skin was the same soft white she had remembered from…she was unsure how long she had been asleep and her cheeks flamed. _

_ Rin pushed herself up so she could glimpse his face. His eyes were closed, and as of yet it didn’t seem like he noticed her moving. She traced the moon on his forehead, and gently stroked the stripes that painted his cheeks. Gingerly she placed a timid kiss on his cheek and for a moment rested her head against his neck. “You’re awake,” she heard him say. There was a smile on his face. He never smiled, not unless he was going to kill someone, or he thought no one was looking. His eyes were still closed, and she felt his arm tighten around her waist. _

_ Rin smiled, “So there is something besides battle that makes you smile,” Rin wanted to test this closeness that was between them. She shifted her weight onto one arm and brushed his bangs from his eyes. When he didn’t stop her, she kissed his lips, they were warm and inviting. He returned the kiss cupping her chin in one hand, “how long did I sleep this time?”_

_ “One day,” Sesshomaru opened his eyes and turned on his side, “and yes, the warmth of a woman always makes me smile. Eat and drink. When you are done I will take you back to the hot springs.”_

_ “So, any woman would make you smile?” Rin winced in pain while pushing herself up and turning over. She felt Sesshomaru scoot closer to her._

_ He stroked her hair behind her shoulders and pulled her bac against his chest, “not any woman, my woman.” He placed his haori over her shoulders leaving him completely exposed. He helped her put her arms inside. “Eat, I can already see your ribs,” he poked them lightly, making Rin laugh. As soon as she did, she regretted it, because of the tension it caused in her back._

_ “Ow,” she held her side, “don’t make me laugh.”_

_ She felt him pull back the haori in a finger, “it’s still bruised badly.”_

_ “Jinenji would probably have something to put on it to help.”_

_ Rin reached for the water bottle and took a deep drink before snacking on some of the food she found around her. She was surprised the fish tasted so good and wondered who had caught and cooked it. “Did you?”_

_ Sesshomaru nodded. He put his chin on Rin’s shoulder, not before pulling the haori off it, to expose her skin. Rin felt heat radiating from between her thighs. “Did you think this Sesshomaru didn’t know how to find human food?”_

_ “You usually made Jaken do it.” She turned her head to look into his eyes but was immediately faced with his lips only millimeters from her own. Rin knew what she wanted, even though her back was still sore, her mind was playing out what had happened the night before. She wanted to feel what he had made her feel before, the fire, the pulsing, the heat. Suddenly, breathing became harder, and she felt her skin heat up. She took a deep breath and turned around, so her front was flush against his. “Sesshomaru,” she gulped._

_ “What is it?” He was smiling. His eyes were very predatory, taking in her body. He was already toying with her hair, twirling it in his fingers. She had never seen a smile touch his eyes before, never seen him look amused the way he did staring at her. _

_ Rin didn’t know what to do, he had led the way the night before. She lowered her head touching her forehead against his and kissed his lips, he returned the kiss with the same intensity. She sought him with her hands and slowly wrapped her left around his member. This time she got to enjoy watching his eyes widen in surprise and the low rumble of a moan emanating from his throat. “Can we?” She kissed his neck, then his collar bone, then explored his chest with her tongue. He lay back enjoying the sensations. She watched as his muscles twitched, as she worked her way to his navel, slowly lapping a circle around it before dropping the haori from her shoulders. She looked up, half asking permission, but all she saw was ecstasy in his eyes. He gave her head a gentle push urging her on. She took him in her hand and only paused a moment before she kissed his erection, licking the tip. She felt intense pleasure radiate within herself pleasuring him like this. He was warm and hard in her mouth._

_ Rin was excited to watch his back arch in pleasure. “Rin,” he sat up quickly and pulled her face to his. He was breathing hard. He pulled her into his lap. She could hardly breathe as his mouth seemed to explore every inch of her body. His hands caressed her breasts, his mouth rolled her nipples. He lay her down and taste between her thighs, while inserting to fingers and stimulating her until she could barely speak. His tongue knew just how to flick over her sensitive buds, “Sesshomaru,” she called his name._

_ He encouraged her to keep her eyes opened. He used one arm to brace her back as she arched. He waited again until she was moaning and he felt her pulsating against his fingers and then pulled her legs around his waist. He plunged himself deep within her. When she gasped with eyes wide open and nails digging into his shoulders he stopped for a moment and smelled her neck, she was only slightly scared but there was a different scent there he had not smelled before. “Alright?”_

_ “It just hurt a little this time,” she was breathing so hard he could see her breasts heaving. He bent over and teased one in his mouth until it was hard and pointed._

_ He lift the upper-half of his body up struggling to maintain control, “just relax,” he took her legs and opened them wider. She felt him slip deeper within her. He caressed the inside of her thighs bringing the pulsing between her legs back. He slowly began moving within her, “is that better?” His eyes were focused, boring into her, “does it feel good?” He thrust again. _

_ “Yes,” she panted, moving her hips with his in unison with his heat. This was what she wanted, to make love to him again. She did as he asked and kept her eyes open. The muscles in his arms tensed. He moved in and out of her in gentle strokes. He held her chin in his hand and wetted her lips with his own. Together they moaned in pleasure. She saw what he probably saw in her when she reached the phase of incoherence. His eyes flashed red for a brief moment. He held her hands above her head in his, kissing her neck. He was panting against her neck and almost inaudibly he spoke in her ear, “I love you, my Rin.” Before she felt him burst within her. He stayed like that for several minutes, holding her hands and resting his face against her cheek._

_ Rin still could not believe those words, “I honestly thought you would be gone when I woke up.”_

_ Sesshomaru rolled onto his side, pulling her to his chest and took a deep breath, “you should know the ones who love the most, are often the most quiet. I don’t speak idly and I do not lie. I told you I would not leave you until you are healed.” He kissed Rin’s hands, “I left you at Kaede’s knowing that when you matured. it would be your choice to come back to me, or to stay in a human village. That choice is still yours.”_

_ “I love you too,” she sighed, exploring his hands, feeling his sharp claws. “I think that’s why it was so hard to be around you the older I became. I didn’t understand why my body was doing what it was. I felt warm, and my heart would pound and my face would flush. It didn’t feel the way I should have felt and I thought you would never return my feelings once I knew what they were. I want to stay with you,” she turned to face him, “I want to explore what we have started,” she pressed her lips into his._

_ “As do I, now come,” he sat up and cradled her in his arms as he stood, walking towards the steaming springs, “you can rest in my arms while the water helps to heal you.”_

* * *

Rin enjoyed the memories they had created. She had never seen Sesshomaru cook, or hunt, but he did for a few days until he sent for Jaken. Once she was strong enough to stand on her own feet and capable of defending herself, they resumed travelling. Sesshomaru enjoyed battle, so the days were spent hunting Yokai that could match his strength. Rin joined in at first to his annoyance and then to his pleasure knowing that she could fend for herself. After a long day, Sesshomaru would find a body of water for them to rest near. He made it clear to Jaken that he would remain on the outside of the camp. Rin felt bad for Jaken, now left alone to his own thoughts, she wondered if she could find a female companion for the little urchin. When night fell, and Rin lay down to sleep, Sesshomaru was by her side, always the same, without his armor or his haori. At first she was shy, but she came to long for his touch, and evenings were spent in warm embraces. Once they discovered her pregnancy, Jaken procured soft furs for her to sleep on. Rin missed the one she loved that night. As the first tear began to roll down her cheek a feeling of unconditional love swept over her. She clasped her hands over her heart. She knew the sensation was coming from him. Sesshomaru was sending his love to her.


	4. Touma's Origin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru meets his mother. We find out who Touma is and why he hates Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru continued following the smell of the powder. It had a putrid almost rotten smell that was floral in nature. He kept his distance. Knowing the strength of the powder, he wasn’t interested in experiencing its effects again. A feeling of longing came into his thoughts, taking him by surprise by its intensity. _She_ was missing him. Even that warmed his heart. Something about being needed by someone else caused a flame in his heart. He refused to admit that his arms, that he had once insisted were made for holding katanas, missed her too. This was a part of the bond they had not perfected. He could sense her emotions, but if they were overwhelming her, they came through strong enough to distract him to the point he didn’t know whose emotions he was feeling. Sesshomaru stopped midair for a moment and closed his eyes. He hovered near the clouds, around the stars. They had experimented with the katana, testing the limits of the bond it created and the power it held. Through the bond he envisioned her in his arms, _Rin. _He attempted to send his own message hoping she was holding the sword and would be able to feel what he did. The feeling was love, he knew that was what he was sending. He couldn’t deny it. He loved her so intensely it was disturbing to know one such as him could feel something like that.

Something caught Sesshomaru’s eye. The shape of a white dog with high ears, flying in the air. She glided high towards her home in the skies. He knew the scent well. He transformed into his true form. The other dog met him and playfully nipped at his neck. He attacked back nipping at her shoulders, until their bodies intertwined and they both landed on the ground in a dust cloud. The forest was cool in the morning light. The dust settled around them, and there was his mother. He glared at her, knowing why she had come. Her arms were folded into her furs, her eyes hard.

“I heard on good authority that you are to be a father. To think you would spite your mother by saying nothing.” His mother was regal. Her hair was tied in two tight pony tails. She was wrapped in a blue cape, wearing three layers underneath her kimono. Her eyes were hard amber globes. Her voice flat as usual.

Sesshomaru remained quiet holding his hands by his side. The hunt needed to continue. He hadn’t seen her since the day her actions had caused Rin to die, again.

“You fashioned your own weapon,” she walked forward and held out her hand.

He removed Bakusaiga and handed it to her.

Slender claw tipped fingers wrapped around the pearled hilt. She ran her hands along the blade. “A powerful weapon, that would rival even that of your father’s.”

When he took the weapon back from her, his mother exclaimed, “your arm,” she immediately reached out and touched his left arm above the elbow, squeezing it lightly, as if finding out if it really existed.

“But you didn’t come to me to discuss my offspring or Bakusaiga did you mother?” Sesshomaru’s eyes were cold. “You came to beg for the life of your son.” He was roiling. Once before she had done this, when he first battled Touma.

His mother’s eyes were as icy as his own. “You began this you know. You didn’t have to take Touma’s eye. He was your brother. You were supposed to protect him and instead you blinded him to protect that hanyou your father produced.”

Anger inflamed Sesshomaru’s heart, “that hanyou, was a child that I promised father **no one** would kill until he reached adulthood. Touma could have waited.” He had managed to find his father’s body in the flames of the collapsed house. He pulled roasting beams from his blackened body hoping to find Tetsusaiga only for his father’s last plea to be that Sesshomaru provide protection to the damn bastard hanyou he had created. He may have hated his father, but honor drove him to agree. He left the fire to char his father’s remains and returned to his mother in the skies. He refused to follow Izayoi around like a lost puppy. She gave him a moonstone, a treasure among Inu-yokai that connected parents to children. He used it to keep track of Inuyasha, threatening Izayoi with death if she ever took it from the infant’s neck.

“You made that promise so you could find Tetsusaiga. If Inuyasha had been killed you never would have found it. Jealousy and anger were your motivation.”

“And if they were? Touma did not have to attack Inuyasha when he was a mere child forcing my hand and invoking the oath I made to **_my father_**_.” _For two centuries they had this argument. Of course he let Inuyasha live, why wouldn’t he have? When Tetsusaiga was not there and he was left with Tenseiga, Sesshomaru always knew that it was likely because the sword was left with his younger hanyou brother.

Sesshomaru’s mother covered her eyes as if offended and whimpered in a high-pitched fake cry, “does that hanyou mean so much more to you?”

“I will not forgive what he has done.” Sesshomaru turned his back on his mother.

She grabbed his arm sharply and bore her teeth at him, “Touma is your brother.”

“I consider him no more a brother than I did Inuyasha. His actions require his death.”

She shook her head and then looked at her son, “then make an oath to me.”

“If it’s to spare Touma’s life, know that he will meet his fate at the end of Bakusaiga.”

“Promise you will bring my grandchild to me for a visit when the little hanyou arrives. You really are your father Sesshomaru,” she laughed and then grabbed Sesshomaru’s chin and looked curiously into his eyes, “she really is in your being isn’t she. You bonded her. I can sense the change in you and see it in the corner of your eyes.”

He shook his face free of her prying hands. “Good-bye mother,” he answered coldly and flew back into the sky.

* * *

Three days passed with no sign of Sesshomaru’s return. Throughout the day, Rin’s fingers wrapped around the golden dog hilt of her sword. Feeling what he felt, Rin knew that Sesshomaru was still alive. She was unsure why she needed the reassurance. She knew he would be fine on his own. It was she that needed protection. Snow fell in the last two days covering the ground in a white blanket. The trees were sprinkled with glistening flakes. Rin breathed in the cool air, her breath came out in misty puffs. She kept herself warm using a lightly colored kimono that Kagome had brought from the village. It was warm wool made from sheep’s-hair and woven thickly for winter. 

Miroku had done as Kagome asked and returned to Jinenji to get the herbs used for childbirth along with warm blankets and cloth for diapers. Kagome and Sango set to teaching Rin how to make the diapers and wash them and explained to her what to expect during labor. Rin asked about the pain, and how she would know when the labor started. The pain scared her the most. Rin was no stranger to pain and hard work, Kaede never let Rin sit idly. There was always something to be planted, harvested, swept or washed. The pain of childbirth was something else. She knew it, she had delivered enough babies to see even the strongest women stripped of their senses and dignity during childbirth. Kagome suggested that as soon as everything was finished with Touma that Rin return to the village with them so she would be among friends when the child came.

“But where would I stay?” Rin wondered. “He won’t want to be under Kaede’s eyes.”

“Kaede-sama figured you would want to come back to have the baby. She asked some of the villagers to help build a hut in the forest for you,” Sango answered, “when you were a child and Sesshomaru visited, he took you to the forest often did he not?”

“Yes,” Rin replied.

“Just don’t ask Kaede-baba about what you two did,” Inuyasha was standing at the mouth of the cave watching the snow fall. His arms were crossed and his face annoyed. “I’m not looking forward to tonight. They will have gotten their sense of smell back.” The snow was still falling in steady droves. The wind howled in the distance.

“Is she angry at me?” Rin wondered. Kaede-sama had explained where babies came from but extolled upon Rin the virtue of being married before intimacy. “Do yokai even get married?”

Inuyasha started laughing, “maybe some do. But this is Sesshomaru we’re talking about. He takes what he wants when he wants it. You’re lucky he stopped the first time to consider what he was doing. Oi, did his eyes turn red again?”

Rin poked Inuyasha’s side appalled, “you promised me you wouldn’t tell anyone about that. You know what it means.” Rin looked at the setting sun. It would be colder soon, “it’s the new moon tonight isn’t it? That’s why you’re not happy.”

“If they were going to attack, now would be the perfect time. I just hope they keep their eyes focused on Sesshomaru, or he finds them,” Miroku added. He was sitting at the mouth of the cave legs crossed and staff in his arms.

“I know what it means. If they did change you might as well be married.” Kagome walked up to join the conversation watching the snow. “Inuyasha’s did the first time as well. It scared the hell out of me. I thought his Yokai blood had taken over again.”

“Kagome that’s private,” Inuyasha muttered shaking his head.

“You just said it yourself,” Kagome responded. “Rin hasn’t been back to talk about what has happened between her and Oni-sama.”

“Would you stop calling him that?” Inuyasha snarled, kicking himself off the wall.

“Why? He’s your brother and giving him the proper respect has softened him…a little. Besides Izayoi really wants to see him and show him her new trick.” Kagome picked up a handful of snow and threw it in Inuyasha’s face. It splatted over his nose and eyes.

“Hey!” He grabbed her by the arm and threw her in a pile of snow just outside the mouth of the cave. Sango took the branch that was sitting above Miroku’s head and shook it until a large blob of snow fell on top of him. He sat in a puddle of snow that covered his entire head, his nose and his entire lap. Rin joined in fashioning snow balls, but quickly became the easy target as she couldn’t move fast enough to get behind any trees or bushes.

“Rin be careful! If any harm comes to you, Sesshomaru-sama will have my head!” Jaken yelled from inside of the cave. Aun and Kirara watched from the sidelines, their heads following the flying blobs of snow as everyone attempted to pelt each other. Rin immediately took a snowball and threw it in Jaken’s face. Jaken screamed in defiance and ran towards the back of the cave.

The snow fight resumed. Laughter filled the air.

“Stop!” Inuyasha called and drew Tetsusaiga. Kirara blew up in size and Aun was on his feet. Inuyasha sniffed the air. He smelled the east and then the west, and then his eyes fell onto Rin. “Rin get on Aun! Get out of here now!”

“Too late for that now isn’t it?” Touma came strutting from the forest with his halberd slung over his shoulder. “I made sure to leave a decoy for Sesshomaru to follow. So don’t hope that he will come rescue you.” Touma was tall and for the first time Rin noticed some similarities between him and Sesshomaru, their height, the length of their hair, except Touma wore his tied back in a pony tail high on his head. Touma’s sword was visible for the first time. It shaped like a large halberd with a lightning storm emblem on the front and a twister on the back. It was nearly as tall as he was with an insidious black line down the middle. “And look, the sun is setting, and soon this Hanyou, will be even more useless than he is now and that wonderful sword of yours will be useless.” The only sound in the air was Touma’s malevolent laughter as he approached the opening of the cave.


	5. Crimson Snow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango and Miroku fight Touma and his followers.

Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga. It glinted in the setting sun. He stalked in Touma’s direction. His red robe of the fire rat blew in the winter breeze. “Rin, go,” he repeated himself.

Rin hiked up her kimono and ran to Aun as quickly as she could manage through the foot of snow on the ground. Her feet stumbled in the trenches of snow. Her mid-section stuck out of the kimono so roundly she traipsed through the snow like a pregnant mother duck. Her heart raced in her chest as her legs moved through the snow. In the past the adrenaline of battle would have taken over Rin but in her current state her emotions were out of control. She radiated fear. Aun let loose a lightening blast at Touma.

The damn dog demon was taking his time approaching. He reveled in his power over the group. His halberd was slung nonchalantly over his shoulder. After several moments he flew into the air at Rin. Rin ducked and grabbed the reigns. Aun sent another blast at Touma. He flipped gracefully backwards, easily dodging the white light and landed lightly on his feet. She held onto the hilt of her sword and closed her eyes long enough to attempt to send a message,_ Sesshomaru, please come, hurry. _Her heart was pounding in her ears. She hated how rapidly that happened these days. She thought the _thump_, _thump_ would deafen her.

“Back off,” Inuyasha leapt between Touma and Rin. He struggled to force his blade to turn black. He already felt it. His yoki was fading. The evil inu-yokai was right, in a matter of minutes, he would be completely depowered and useless. Inuyasha grit his teeth. The horizon was turning gray.

“Oh, don’t run Rin,” Touma held out a playful hand, “it’s already too late. You brought your friends Inuyasha, so did I.” A devilish smile creased his lips. His golden eyes turned red. Out of the forest stalked five Inu-Yokai. They weren’t in their human forms. They towered over everyone, their vicious fangs dripped venom. Two were brown, one white and the other two black.

Rin gulped. Her eyes dilated in fear. Kagome ran for her bow and arrow while Miroku grabbed several sutras. “Kazana would be nice right now!” Miroku cursed. He never thought there would be a day he wished for his wind tunnel back. The dogs advanced on Rin blocking Aun from taking off. They snarled ferociously.

“Get Rin out of here!” Inuyasha directed Aun. His blade finally turned black. He aimed directly at Touma. “Meido Zangetsha!” He yelled crashing moon shaped blades at Touma.

Touma danced and twirled, missing the many blades flying from Tetsusaiga, “oh come on you can do better than that!” He laughed defiantly. The meido blades slashed into the forest, crumpling trees and bounders behind them into jagged edges. “I thought you were able to take Sesshomaru’s arm. Show me what you really can do with that weak fang hanyou,” he mocked Inuyasha and charged him. The sky completely clouded over. Dust storms of snow fell from the sky lowering visibility.

Rin tried to get on Aun only to be knocked down by a large paw. She held her side as it smashed against the snow. The same brown feral dog took position between her and Sango, Kagome, Miroku and Inuyasha cutting her off from help and escape. She stood up and tried to run. Immediately she found an arm around her waist. It was one of the demons. He had transformed back to his humanoid form to grab her. She jabbed at his stomach with her sword reading the shock in his eyes as it slid cleanly through his stomach and released the whip to throw him back. _Remember a demons body needs more to kill it than a human. a strike that will kill a human, will not kill a demon. The stronger they are, the less susceptible to death they are._ Sesshomaru’s words echoed in her ears. This demon wasn’t done with her yet. Rin took a deep breath. She took the light sword in two hands and planted her feet squarely in the snow. Her elbows squeezed uncomfortably against her stomach. She would fight, to the end if she had to.

Kagome released several arrows trying to stop the advancing dogs. Their pink lights landed in the fur of the large animals. They singed the skin, then fell to the ground defeated. “Dammit,” she cursed nocking another arrow. She drew on more of her spiritual powers. She imagined she was fighting Sesshomaru again, although she had never been able to get near to the power needed to bind him. She drew two arrows and aimed them at Touma. She imbued them with as much of her power as she could draw on and let them fly. He dodged them flying through air. His target was Rin. The rest was just a distraction.

Inuyasha sent more blades at the two brown dogs. The meido blades did little more than leave deep gashes in the brown fur, staining the white snow with thick, hot blood. Inuyasha let out one last battle yell as he intended to send a larger meido, a full moon at Touma. He leapt into the air flying. Half way through Tetsusaiga transformed to a rusty sword in his hand. He looked down at his fingers, clawless, his black hair flying in the chilled wind. “Oh, no…” Inuyasha landed roughly in the snow. His feet felt frozen. Something he didn’t experience as easily, except in his human form. “Rin, run! Get out of here!”

“Hiraikotsu!” Sango jumped on Kirara’s back and aimed for one of the large black dogs. It jumped into the air and grabbed Sango in its’ mouth. Sango stuffed Hiraikotsu vertically into its mouth to stop it from clamping on top of her. She was held hostage by its mangled tongue. The tongue struggled to shove the demon bone weapon out of its mouth so it could snapped its venomous teeth down on top of Sango.

“Sango!” Inuyasha yelled, “don’t let the saliva touch you.” He ran for Rin, knowing he was no longer a match for Touma. He didn’t care. He hoped to help her get the dog demon that was after her out of the way so she could escape.

Kagome shot more arrows. One pierced the eye of one of the dogs. In the same breath, the dog grabbed Miroku around the waist and threw him into a tree. A wicked snap cracked his elbow and head. The monk lost consciousness. Sango cried for him but couldn’t rest herself from the jaws that surrounded her. Touma flew to Rin, who was holding her own against one of Touma’s followers and took out his Halberd. He used it to summon a lightening shock from the sky that he stopped centimeters from her stomach, “put that pretty sword back in its’ scabbard or you will have no child.” He walked casually at her.

Rin licked her lips nervously. They were dry. Her hand was shaking. She complied and put it back in the scabbard. She hugged her stomach instinctively to protect it. _Please Sesshomaru, help me. _She begged in her thoughts, _I can’t fight them. _

“Let her go!” Inuyasha called, attacking despite his human form. Inuyasha picked up a fallen branch and used it to hit Touma in the head. Touma laughed and slapped him away. He threw Rin to the ground roughly and focused on Inuyasha, “I lost my eye because of you hanyou!” He kicked Inuyasha in the stomach.

Kagome watched from the mouth of the cave in fear. Blood spewed from Inuyasha’s mouth. His head was bruised. Touma was focusing his rage on Inuyasha’s face. “I should take your eye…this is all your fault!” He threw Inuyasha into a tree. Touma grabbed his arm in pain. One of Kagome’s arrows hit him in the shoulder, piercing his armor.

“The next one is in your heart Touma! Let him go!” Kagome couldn’t get past the mouth of the cave. There were too many paws flying. The high-pitched howls and growls filled the air.

“Kagome no!” Inuyasha called, “he’ll turn on you.” Inuyasha was in the snow holding his bleeding side. A large gash ran across his middle. His life-force spilled onto the white snow in a puddle by his feet. She spat blood from his mouth onto the ground. He struggled to stand, dropping to one knee.

Rin watched on in horror as her friends were brutalized. The dog that had Sango finally managed to spit Hiraikotsu out into the flurry of snow. It’s teeth came smashing down on top of Sango’s middle as she tried to leap out. Sango screamed in pain. Aun threw a lightning bolt at the dog that held her. The deadly teeth punctured Sango’s middle. Sango fainted in pain. “Sango!” Rin cried. She ran towards Aun trying to get on his back again. If her stomach wasn’t so insufferably large, she would have been able to get up faster. Another Inu-Yokai transformed into a human in front of her. He clubbed her in the head, slamming a branch into the side of her forehead. Her world was dark. She fell limp into his arms. He took off with Rin in his arms, “Touma!” He called, “I have her.”

“Take her. The rest of us will follow after we feed.” Touma lunged at Inuyasha. “And your blood hanyou, is hardly worth drinking but will satisfy my need for revenge against you and your bastard brother.”

“Touma, I promise I will kill you,” Inuyasha was on the ground coughing up blood, “don’t you dare…” His voice ended in a hiss as Touma’s halberd struck through Inuyasha’s back and splattered blood onto the white snow. Inuyasha’s eyes glazed over. He fell to the forest floor on his face, unmoving. The snow absorbed the fluid flooding the forest floor. Touma ground the halberd deeper into Inuyasha’s back. He ripped it out of his back throwing Inuyasha’s dead body into a tree cackling in triumph.

“Inuyasha!!” Kagome screamed in pain. She fired two more arrows at Touma. They hit his other shoulder and the armor on his chest. Instead of attacking her he flew into the air and directed the remaining dogs, “Takeshi, come with me. The rest kill the Miko, eat the bodies.”

“Inuyasha,” she ran to him. She looked at her friends. Blood covered her hands. Kirara sat next to Sango licking her face, trying to wake Sango. Kirara was injured. Her paw was covered in blood. Jaken came running from the cave all too late to help. “Inuyasha,” Kagome fell on her knees. Blood fled from the deep gash in his middle. He was human, she tried staunching the blood, “Jaken bring me cloths, quickly and the herbs.” She rolled Inuyasha’s body over, she was soaked in his blood. “Hurry,” she ripped open the red haori. She could see his insides threatening to spill through the tear in his middle. “I can save him,” she told herself. “I can…”

Jaken wasn’t moving. He held Nintojo and stared at the three advancing dogs. Their saliva dripped down their fangs releasing a sickening poison. Kagome stood up, wiping tears from her eyes. She shot at one and hit him squarely between the eyes. The power of anger caused the arrow to light and then disappear completely purifying the beast. She aimed at the white one. It charged her, throwing her to the side with its giant paw. She landed against the snow. She rolled out of the way and stood. She tried shooting at the other. Jaken futily used Nintojo to blow flames in their eyes. Kagome’s hands shook. She stood over Inuyasha and tried to draw again only to be without arrows. She felt her end nearing and feared that she would faint from fear. Her knees were near buckling, her breath was coming quickly. She was trying to focus on the two savage beasts coming towards them. They licked their lips hungrily. “Jaken, what do we do?”

Jaken was frozen in his place.

A rage filled howl pierced the bloodbath from behind Kagome. Another white dog flew over her head snarling and crashing on top of the attacking white dog. It ripped in to the other two, ripping at their necks and shredding their flesh. Kagome immediately dropped back to try to stop Inuyasha’s bleeding. Inuyasha wasn’t breathing. She felt his neck. He barely had a pulse. “No, Inuyasha,” she sobbed, she breathed into his mouth, “Inuyasha, please. Don’t die.”

With one last roar the white dog that attacked the other two threw the last one into the forest stepped on its’ neck with one gigantic paw and then bent over and snapped the dog’s neck in his jaws. A white light enveloped the panting white dog and returned to its human form. Standing before Kagome was Sesshomaru. His hands were shaking by his sides. His eyes were flames of anger. He immediately looked at Jaken and then saw Inuyasha on the ground, black hair matted and soaked in his own blood. He watched Kagome trying to save his brother, with the breathing method she had once used on Rin. “Miko,” he called to her, “stop.”

“No. I can’t,” Kagome wiped her tears. The action left streaks of blood on her face. “If I can just keep his heart beating until the sun comes up, his yoki will take over and save him.”

Sesshomaru walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder, “let him pass.”

“I can’t,” she sobbed still trying to save Inuyasha. She pumped on his chest. Each palpation squeezed blood from Inuyasha’s chest. Kagome was soaked from head to toe in his blood.

Sesshomaru pushed her out of the way. “Let him pass!” The soft voice was gone and he bellowed at her, throwing Kagome to the snow.

“What are you doing?” Kagome screamed at him.

Sesshomaru drew Tenseiga, “the living Tenseiga cannot touch,” he waited. He pushed Kagome back down. “Wait,” he held her wrist to keep her from falling on top of her dead lover. The thudding of Inuyasha’s heart stopped. He kept Tenseiga raised, ready. He waited. His eyes became half cast as the last vestiges of life left Inuyasha, _I can see them. _He saw the minions from the netherworld. Their small cruel hands stabbed the life from his brother. He swung Tenseiga at them, killing all three in one glowing blue light. He sheathed his katana.

“You saved him?” Kagome was too shocked to say anything more. She pulled her wrist loose from Sesshomaru’s grasp. She crawled through the snow and touched Inuyasha’s neck waiting for his pulse to return. After a few minutes it was there. Inuyasha slowly opened his eyes. “Inuyasha?” Kagome was in shock.

“Where is Rin? Her scent is gone.” Sesshomaru stood up, one of his arms was dripping blood from the shoulder.

“You’re hurt, Kagome” Inuyasha said from the ground. He coughed spitting out the last vestiges of blood from his mouth.

“It’s okay,” Kagome held her shoulder, “I can bandage it. Inuyasha!” She fell on him kissing his mouth.

He coughed again, then stood up touching his stomach where the halberd had pierced his flesh. He glanced at Sesshomaru, “that bastard…he brought five of his friends. They were transformed. They knew about my weakness tonight. How did they know? And why did they say it was my fault?”

“I can’t smell Rin,” Sesshomaru’s voice beat the wind. He stomped over to Miroku, “he will live.” He tossed the monk’s limp body down. He continued over to Sango.

Kagome was already next to her, “she was poisoned. But her wounds aren’t serious. Kirara! Come quickly! Can you fly?” Kirara meowed as she limped to Kagome, “Sesshomaru, please help me please. They fought to defend Rin. Help me get them on her back. She can take them to Kaede-sama and Jinenji.”

Sesshomaru complied and heaved their bodies on the two-tailed cat. Kirara flew into the air.

Jaken came running over, “forgive us Sesshomaru-sama! They have taken Rin!”

Sesshomaru howled and slashed down a tree, “I go now…they are masking her scent somehow. I can still sense her through the sword.”

“Sesshomaru wait!” Inuyasha grabbed Aun’ reigns and climbed on, “I’m coming too.”

“Yes, me too.” Kagome ran back inside the cave and grabbed two more quivers. “They took Rin and they hurt our friends.” As she ran she took some rags and tied them around the cut in her arm.

“What good will you be Inuyasha in your current form?” If Inuyasha didn’t know any better he would have thought he saw regret and sorrow cross his brother’s eyes.

“He said it was my fault. If I’m going to get the crap kicked out of me by someone who knows my weakness I deserve to know why?” Inuyasha answered harshly, “come on Kagome, get on. Let’s go…”

“They are masking her scent so I can’t follow, but they don’t know about our connection through the…” Sesshomaru’s eyes widen he let out a low groan, “her stomach,” he touched his stomach. It was flinching in pain, contracting his muscles, “they are hurting her stomach. She is in pain.” Sesshomaru almost doubled over from the intensity. He felt a burning sensation that started from high in his belly and radiated downwards, squeezing the muscles together. They were killing her. He fell against a tree to catch his breath. His breath came out in hot gasps. He held his stomach until the pain subsided.

Kagome looked at Sesshomaru and then at Inuyasha, “is it constant or coming and going?” If it was what she hoped it was…Rin would need their help quickly.

“It stopped, we must go.” Sesshomaru’s heart was pounding. He gripped Bakusaiga in frustration. He needed something to kill.

“Wait, just a minute,” Kagome jumped off Aun and ran back into the cave.

“I will not wait for you,” Sesshomaru scolded them.

“You should,” Inuyasha chided, “they may not be hurting her. She may be in labor. Kagome is getting some supplies.” Inuyasha explained, “giving birth like this will be dangerous for her and the baby.”

“She said there were two months,” he said in disbelief.

“If it were a human pregnancy,” Inuyasha shook his head, “you really didn’t learn anything about hanyou pregnancies from anyone did you? She’s already way overdue for this baby to come. That’s probably what you are feeling.”

The pain came again. It washed over Sesshomaru’s stomach like a wave. The only problem was, he wasn’t just sensing the pain. He was feeling it’s intensity with her. She had said it would hurt. It would be painful to birth his child. He grunted, trying to ignore the flaming in his belly.

“You need us to come with you,” Inuyasha told him, “you won’t know how to help her. Kagome does.”

Sesshomaru’s eyes widened in a way that made Inuyasha back away. _She will be in more danger now than she was before_. Kagome came back quickly with blankets, cloths and a few herbs. She jumped behind Inuyasha on Aun. Aun lifted off following Sesshomaru.

Below they could hear Jaken yelling, “hey wait for me!”

“O-ni-sama, let me know if you sense the pain in her stomach again. It’s only going to get worse. You’ll have to try to not let it distract you. Poor Rin, she shouldn’t be alone.” Kagome held onto Inuyasha’s stomach. She pushed her hands through the hole in his shirt and felt his skin, whole and healed. She kissed Inuyasha’s shoulder and neck. “I’m so happy you are okay.”

“It’s okay Kagome,” he held her hands in his, “I’m okay now.” He turned his head back and captured her lips in his.

Sesshomaru flew next to them, leading the way he focused on the sensation from their connection leading him to Rin. “What good will you do as a weak human Inuyasha?” Sesshomaru asked again.

“Why did he say this was my fault? I got run through by his halberd protecting your mate. You could at least answer the question.”

Sesshomaru glared, but not before his hand touched his own stomach again. His stomach contracted, crushing the muscles. He tried to focus on the snow falling, the fresh air, the rise and fall of his chest, anything but what was coming through the bond. Beside the pain was Rin’s intense fear and desperate pleas for him to rescue her. It was as if she was screaming in his ears. _Sesshomaru, save me please. I’m so scared. _

“We need to hurry Inuyasha,” Kagome said observing the change of expression on Sesshomaru’s face. “For Rin’s sake. She shouldn’t give birth to the baby alone. She should be surrounded by people who love her.”

“In the meantime, Ni-san,” Inuyasha looked at his brother with kind eyes, for once it was not with anger or hatred, “Why is this my fault?” Inuyasha understood clearly what it felt like to have someone you love taken captive.

Sesshomaru glowered at Inuyasha after that last word but then continued in his own arrogant way to face forward and pretend to ignore them while he spoke. “Father came to me before he died. He was injured badly from battling Ryukosusei. I demanded Tetsusaiga and So-ungo from him, knowing he would soon meet his end. He denied me because I had no one to protect, because I had no heart. He knew your mother was in labor and was in danger, so he went to save her. As you know, he was killed by a samurai. I followed him, not to help him but to take Tetsusaiga off his dead body to spite him. I didn’t know that Myoga and Totosai had already been there. I looked on our father’s body covered in blood. He told me that he had already helped Izayoi and the baby escape. I turned to leave when he grabbed my arm, with his last breath he made me promise to protect you. I refused. I told him I would not waste my time with the life of a hanyou. He asked me to ensure that you would at least make it to adulthood and when you did the oath would be annulled. I agreed,” Sesshomaru looked at Inuyasha. “Do you remember a time when you were a child, you were chased by many Yokai, you hid under a rock thinking they wouldn’t find you there?”

Kagome and Inuyasha both looked at him shocked. Inuyasha knew that memory well. They had surrounded him in the forest. He ran as fast as he could. He couldn’t get away so he hid himself under a large rock just near a cliff. He saw a flash of light and then they were gone, and the forest was quiet.

“They were Touma’s demons. Touma is also my younger brother, older than you, also a full Yokai, but we do not share the same noble father. At some point mother became annoyed with our father’s desire to protect weak humans so she turned to a new lover. Touma found your existence to be a disgrace to our kind and swore to kill you. I made an oath to our father that until you were an adult, I would protect you if I could and I did. That night you were not killed because I came to your aid. Touma and I battled. He was angry that I would choose a hanyou over a pure-blooded brother. I took his eye and out of respect for our mother I spared his life. He was warned if he ever sought your life again before you were an adult, it would mean his death.”

Inuyasha couldn’t speak, “I thought they just lost my scent.”

“They knew where you were, the pathetic child you were. Now he seeks revenge against me by taking…” In quiet moments with Rin, Sesshomaru could admit what was within his heart, the words did not come out awkwardly or feel like he was breaking through a wall. With others it felt like he was cutting through a mountain. _He will not take her life, he will not take my child. Rin is my heart._

“You spared his life to just to try to kill him when he was older?” Kagome yelled at Sesshomaru, “you were so cruel! You used his mother, you stabbed Inuyasha through the heart! You tried to take Tetsusaiga from him over and over even though you knew that he didn’t have anything else to remember his father by!”

“And he cut my arm off and nearly killed me with Kaze no Kizu. I only made the oath to protect his life until he reached adulthood. Beyond that was no longer my concern.” Sesshomaru shot back staring at Kagome. The glare lasted only a moment before he grunted, “the pain is getting stronger. You’re sure they aren’t hurting her?”

“If they were going to beat her to death the pain would be endless, if it’s coming and going she must be in labor,” Inuyasha responded. “Ni-san…origato.”

“I don’t need your thanks, I merely was fulfilling an oath made to father. Had he not forced me to take the oath I would have hunted your mother down and killed both of you myself.” Sesshomaru winced, _it’s worse, it’s coming faster. Rin, I’m coming. _

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, “Baka…”


	6. Life and Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru tracks Rin to where Touma is holding her in a cave. Rin is in full labor. Will he get there in time to save her and his child?

Rin woke up groggily inside of another cave. She could hear the drip, drip of moisture falling from the cone like rock fixtures above her to the hard stone below. She was on her side, her round stomach twinging. _What is it with Yokai and caves? _She thought angrily. She dared to open one eye a slit.

There were three Inu-Yokai guarding her. Touma and two of his followers. She could hear the rumblings of several ogres outside the cave. She didn’t know where she was and her head was pounding. Not only was her head pounding but waves of pain were emanating from the top of her stomach down between her legs and felt like they were squeezing her abdomen. She touched the temple of her head. Her hand came away blood soaked. She immediately felt for her side for the katana. She breathed a sigh of relief. She wrapped her fingers around the dog shaped hilt, worry, intense worry, anger and…

“Touch the sword again and we’ll take it,” the Inu-Yokai warned her.

Rin nodded in agreement releasing the hilt. She had just enough time to pull herself off the harsh ground before another wave washed over her. She tried to breathe through it and act as normal as she could. She folded her arms in defiance, but inside she could feel herself stretching, _please little one, not now. _It felt important not to let on that the baby was coming. She could barely force herself to continue sitting and when she did she regretted it. It put undue pressure against her backside. It made the stretching below feel that much stronger. She forced herself on to her knees as soon as the pain subside. She could feel bruises forming on her tender skin. She decided on standing, even if the movement made her world spin. She clutched her head. The blood rushing to the wound. _Everything hurts. Sesshomaru, please, _Rin tried not to cry, _please hear me. Come to me. Please…I need you. _Hot tears made their way down her cheek. _I’m so scared…our baby is coming. _

As if coming from the depths of the darkness, Rin thought she could hear the wind whispering in the distance, _Rin, I’m coming. Hold on my heart. I’m coming._

“Touma, what will we do with her now? We masked her scent. They can’t find her.” The one with brown hair asked. He flipped his mokomoko around in his hand irritably.

“I think I want to have some fun with her first,” Touma giggled chewing on one of his claws. His golden eye flashed up to Rin against the wall. He stared at her while he spoke, “make her scream. Violate her. Leave her dead body for her lover to find. Maybe gut her too. What do you think little girl. I know you’ve bedded my brother. Want to know what real demon love is?”

“Brother?” Rin balked right as another pain came. She forced herself to keep her breathing steady and ignore the pinching and stretching she felt. It burned a line of fire down her abdomen to her center. She could feel the baby shifting, moving its way lower into her pelvis. _Brother? _She wanted to cry harder. It was taking all her strength to remain upright through the pain.

Touma jumped down from his perch and flipped his halberd around arrogantly, “he didn’t tell you? Not even after he said my name in front of you? Maybe you don’t know Sesshomaru as well as you think. Maybe he isn’t the man you think he is.” He began a tauntingly slow approach towards Rin.

“He’s a stronger yokai than you ever will be,” Rin spat at Touma. The pain finally left, giving her a moment of peace.

“You didn’t know him before. You never saw the cold side of him. The side that took other women to his bed. The side that ravished their bodies until they were dripping in his blood and sweat. You know you weren’t his first right? He’s bedded many others. Hundreds, perhaps thousands. And you think he will come for you? Be loyal to you? Because put his seed in you?” Touma reached out towards her stomach.

Rin slapped Touma’s hand away from her belly. She rolled her eyes and retorted, “I figured that out a long time ago. He is over 900 years old Touma. I highly doubt he waited 900 years for me. Not to mention I lived with him as a child. You don’t think I didn’t hear some snarling and growling in the forest at night? I never saw him between the legs of a demoness?”

“A spicy one,” Touma came closer and grabbed her chin, “such soft skin,” he caressed her chin with the claw of his thumb drawing blood, “tell me was he your first? You don’t look very old. Maybe I’ll be your second.” He raised his eyebrows and brought his lips near Rin’s.

“Get your hands off me,” Rin slapped his hand from her face.

Touma grabbed both her shoulders and pulled Rin closer to his face, “I’m going to have so much fun leaving my scent all over your dead body.”

“And I’ll enjoy watching Sesshomaru tear your limbs from your body,” _be quiet Rin, _her mind plead with her. _Stop goading him. _Touma snarled angrily and threw Rin against the wall of the cave. She tried to land on her feet but one of her ankles twisted slightly. It bent to the side making her lose her balance. She lowered herself breathing hard with another pain taking control of her body. She wanted to cry, she wanted to scream, but if she let them know, she knew her child would be in danger.

She had to calm herself. How was she going to have her baby here? She wouldn’t let them near it. She would protect this child with her life if she had to. She would find a way to birth the child as quietly as possible…but she did not know how she would hide its’ scent. Tears came again as Touma hovered near her. The pain was getting stronger, ripping her lower and lower. Her lips quivered in fear. She wanted to feel how far along she was but Touma’s eyes were on her and her alone. _I will not let him touch me_. She still had her sword and with that she would fight them to the death if need be. She would not sit idly and allow them to kill her child. _You will survive my little one. Chichiue is coming. She closed her eyes. Please hurry. _Against her will, her breathing became haggard and more rapid. She was near the opening of the cave, but with three Yokai blocking her, she wouldn’t make it far. Behind her was an empty cavern. She glanced one way then the other. Not sure which way she should run. The flames of pain licked down to her center. Now she knew why women said the end was the worst. She panted through the pain, hoping Touma thought she was just afraid.

Touma turned around and walked towards Rin. “Well, my brother may have had you first but now it’s my turn,” he hefted her up and forced his lips on hers. When she tried to run her head, he forced it back to his and hissed through yellow clinched teeth, “and I won’t be so gentle!” He forced his knee between her legs. “I will have you screaming my name.”

Rin tripped backwards in her effort to get out of his grasp. Her hand went instinctively to the hilt of her katana. _Give me strength to fight._

* * *

Sesshomaru landed downwind from where the sensations emanating from the sword originated. His stomach was cramping in time with her contractions. Here he would avoid Touma’s sense of smell. He glanced back at his hanyou, or rather mortal brother and rolled his eyes. “If you insist on coming like that, find Rin. Stay out of my way. Tenseiga will not be able to save you again.” Sesshomaru rubbed his stomach feeling the fire in his belly forming again. It was almost as if he could feel his insides stretching.

“Always a great attitude that one,” Inuyasha griped as he climbed off of Aun. He helped Kagome down. Kagome gathered the supplies in a bundle and swung it over her shoulder along with her quiver.

“He’s worried,” Kagome followed after Sesshomaru. She adjusted her quiver and held on nervously to her bow. They trudged through the thick snow shoulder to shoulder.

“I do not worry.” Sesshomaru rolled his eyes in defiance as he took a faster pace in the directions of the sensations. He could smell Rin. She was terrified, and something else. Her body was emitting a smell that was new. _New life…_he had smelled it on her when she delivered babies. His bottom lip trembled. The angry pain flushed through his stomach with so much force he nearly stopped walking. He couldn’t fathom why he didn’t hear Rin screaming through the pain she was in. His own stomach was tense in response. Her fear was so clear he could taste it. They would have to do something about this connection, it was a distraction. _Touma will pay for this. I will kill him._

* * *

_I have to do something. _Rin closed her eyes again. She felt tears in the corner of her eyes. The pains were getting stronger, more powerful. She would push soon and then what? She shook her head in disbelief. She was so sore, and so very tired. Touma was within inches of her. Rin was backed against the wall, as the next contraction slammed against her body. She tried to bend her knees in a vain attempt to resist the pain. Before she could draw her sword, Touma’s rough hand was on her wrist shoving the sword back into its sheathe. Rin’s hand quivered trying to free it. She attempted to kick Touma in the stomach. Instead of budging, he grabbed her by the hair and pulled her head back exposing her neck. Another wave came crashing down on Rin as her neck was exposed to his deadly long fangs. She couldn’t concentrate. She screamed in pain. She felt her body shake and buckle in disgust as Touma ran his tongue down her neck, “that hanyou is coming isn’t it? Wonderful. That makes two bodies I’ll leave for Lord Sesshomaru to find.”

“You won’t touch my child,” Rin heaved herself up and clawed Touma in the face. Her nails scratched down the scar tissues around his missing eye.

Touma snarled at her. He refused to release her hand that held the sword. “I’ll touch more than that.” He slammed her back against the cave.

“Let me go!” Rin screamed and kicked Touma between the legs. He raised a foot to block her. Rin struck at Touma’s hand holding her sword. Touma cackled, he pushed the material off the shoulder of her kimono. He shoved his knee between her leg. He grabbed hungrily at her exposed breast. _Sesshomaru, help me…_ Touma grabbed both her wrists and slammed them over her head. He held them down in one hand while the other grabbed her hair and forced her head back to expose her neck again. Rin cringed at the feeling of his knee between her legs as pain after pain began to rack her body.

His teeth were coming for her neck. Rin’s eyes flashed to her katana. She struggled against Touma’s head. _Sesshomaru please. I can’t fight him on my own. He’s too strong. Help me. Save me. _Her legs danced beneath her to cope with the pain she was. _Please! Please stop him! _The ruby eyes on the golden hilt of the sword lit up blood red. The body of the dog changed positions raising its paws up. It flew from Rin’s sheathe. The paws looped around the hand holding Rin’s wrists over her head. It sunk its teeth into the demon’s skin, drawing blood and spewing a green poison. Rin moved her hands too late. Where the poison burned Touma’s hand, rippling it in angry red flesh, forcing him to release Rin. It tickled her skin like a morning dew. She caught the sword in her hand and flung the whip at Touma’s face aiming for his good eye. In the same breath, water dripped from between her legs. Touma was thrown back several steps. She fell against the wall of the cave to catch her breath. She put a hand out to the wall to hold herself up. She felt hot and cold all at once. Her knees wanted to give way beneath her. She needed to get away. The entrance was still blocked by the other demons. Her only choice was to run deeper into the cave and hide. She fled, trying to ignore the cramping it caused in her stomach. She tripped over rocks blindly running towards the darkness. She hid behind a large rock. She knew their eyes would be sharp and this would only give her a few minutes reprieve. She would not allow them to take her not without a fight. She slid her hand down between the material of her kimono to her opening. Her eyes dilated, _I’m almost complete…Please my love, I can’t do this on my own. I need help. Help me. Don’t let them hurt our baby. _

“Takeshi find her!” Touma yelled at his companion holding his reddened hand and face. “Dammit! that poison stung like that bastards. He made that katana from himself for a lowly human to wield our Yoki. He really has become soft.” He stalked to Rin’s scent. “Come out human! I smell your birth. You and your bastard are going to die.”

Takeshi followed after Rin. Rin tried to steady her breathing gulping large breaths of air but this time the wave that crashed over her had her on her hands and knees. She wished there was someone to put pressure on her lower back as she felt it radiate down between her legs. The baby really was coming and coming now. She bit her lip to stop herself from shouting in pain until she felt blood. She attempted vainly to dig her nails into the stone flooring. There was pressure between her legs. She felt the baby’s head moving down. She could feel soft twitches of the eyes wiggling against her pelvic bone. _Sesshomaru, _she held the katana in her hand, _please I can’t. It hurts. _

A swift howl from outside and a bright green light flashed through the cave. Rin peeked her head out from the rock to see what was happening. Sesshomaru was on top of Touma. He wasted no time drawing Bakusaiga. The green light settled into the form of a giant white dog with his ruff flowing in the wind. His eyes were red and furious. Before Sesshomaru could scoop Touma into his mouth, Touma’s other companion transformed from behind him into a large brown dog and leapt onto Sesshomaru’s back digging his teeth into Sesshomaru’s shoulders.

“If that’s how you want it, Onisan,” Touma snarled mirroring Sesshomaru’s rage he changed into a giant white dog with black fur around his cheeks and hair flowing as long as his brothers. Sesshomaru threw the brown dog from his back and out of the cave. He snarled fiercely at Touma’s white form. His fangs dripped green poison that steamed against the cold cave floor. Sesshomaru forced the grappling out of the cave. They clashed in the falling snow nipping and biting each other. Claws aimed for throats. Sesshomaru’s knees buckled beneath him the moment he felt pain radiating from his connection to Rin, in that moment Touma was on top of him tearing into his stomach with his claws, wetting the snow in crimson fluid. Rin panted behind the rock watching her lover torn to pieces.

* * *

“Inuyasha, we have to find Rin and get the sword off of her,” Kagome called as she ran dodging the paws that were scraping at each other. “He can’t fight like this! Every time she has a contraction, he feels it!” She rolled to the left, “it’s crippling him!”

The sun was beginning to rise. The sky was fading from pitch black to light grey. The last vestiges of the night lights were bidding the world goodbye. Inuyasha looked at the slit of gold lighting the horizon as if it was his savior, “good. I’ll be back in soon. There may be more! Kagome look out!”

A green ogre came from the side swiping at Kagome. She knocked an arrow and sent it flying directly at the Ogres eyes. The arrow disappeared in a pink light taking the ogre with it. Two more came from behind them, “Inuyasha, find Rin!” Kagome yelled at him.

Sesshomaru forced himself off his buckled knee. He used his back legs to kick Touma off of him. As soon as he did, the brown dog was on his back, ripping holes into his skin. Sesshomaru threw his shoulders forward throwing the brown dog off his back onto the snowy ground. He pounced on its neck. With the deadly poison leaking from Sesshomaru’s mouth, he sunk his teeth into the brown dog’s neck releasing a toxic cloud of dokkasu into its jugular. Red angry eyes were now on Touma. Sesshomaru was panting in pain. Blood dripped from his stomach like rain painting the snow. Touma’s form stalked Sesshomaru, watching his eyes, waiting for the injured beast to make his move. Touma could smell death on Sesshomaru. He would end his older brother’s life.

* * *

“I’m not leaving you,” Inuyasha insisted as he dodged another blow from the ogre coming from the forest. The two dogs were battling it out viciously. Snow flurried around them. Touma was easily winning. The pain coming through the bond was taking its final toll on Sesshomaru. His legs were shaking. He was panting hard and everywhere he landed, blood fled from the gaping wound in his middle. Touma ran, dodged Sesshomaru’s open mouth and leapt onto his elder brother’s back. He tire into his thick ruff, ripping at his flesh. Kagome’s mouth fell open when Sesshomaru toppled on his side. What sounded like a high-pitched whine came from his mouth.

“Go now!” She shoved Inuyasha, “Sesshomaru can’t last much longer with Rin’s pain. Which means Rin is close to pushing and I sense another Inu-Yokai in the cave.” Kagome took out two more Ogres and stood fast in front of the cave blocking the entrance. “Go! I’ll hold them back. You stand a better chance against the one in the cave anyway, remember you’ve beaten Sesshomaru.”

Inuyasha nodded and kissed Kagome on the cheek. With a grin on his face he said, “I’ll cut both his arms off.” He ran into the cave searching for Rin.

Sesshomaru grabbed at Touma’s neck. Touma ripped free and threw Sesshomaru on the ground. The pain came sweeping through the bond again. Sesshomaru’s back legs buckled beneath him. In that moment Touma ripped into Sesshomaru’s neck. Blood splattered the white snow. Sesshomaru howled in pain and fell to the ground choking on his own blood. Kagome looked on frightened. She shot an arrow at Touma aiming for his good eye but missed. _Hurry Inuyasha._ She nocked another arrow. _Hit it this time. Hit the mark_. She raised the arrow near her eye aiming carefully.

* * *

“Rin!” Inuyasha ran into the dark cave. “Rin where are you?”

“Who the hell are you?” Came a roar from behind him. This one instead of having the familiar white hair, had jet black hair and a long black tail wrapped around his waist.

“That’s my line,” Inuyasha growled back. He grimaced, his hand went to Tetsusaiga. His nails still looked human. He could feel it though, the sun would rise soon.

“Inuyasha?!” He heard from higher in the cave, “take this!”

Inuyasha saw Rin’s sword flying through the air. He caught it in his hand and laughed, “I may not have my yoki right now, but I can deal with a dog like you.” He charged, Rin’s katana held high.

Takeshi drew his own sword, “with that puny thing.”

“Just wait until the sun finishes rising. Rin, get out of here!” Inuyasha grasped Rin’s sword. He felt something flash through him. The green light came flying out at the sword forming into a gigantic green serpent. “Not bad.” He sent the whip at Takeshi. Takeshi growled and flew at Inuyasha sword extended.

Rin fell to the ground giving into the pain. She didn’t try to stop her screams this time. The sound that came from her lips rattled the cave, reverberating off the walls., She felt something drop from in her stomach to lower in her pelvis. She couldn’t move. Her voice changed to a low pitched growl as the last of the pain washed over her. _I’m pushing. _She couldn’t speak. _Sesshomaru…please. _

_ I’m with you. _She thought she was dreaming hearing the words echoing in her mind.

“Rin go!” Inuyasha yelled at her while he parried a blow from the black haired demon.

“I can’t,” she wept, “the baby is coming now!” Rin reached down and felt between her legs. She could feel the moist, spongy head through the thinning skin of her opening. The baby would crown soon. She had assisted at many births. Soon their child would be born in this damp dark cave. Rin heaved in and out, _slow breathing, big breaths. _“Sesshomaru,” she whimpered, “I don’t want to be alone. Ahhhh!!!” The pressure came down on her, the urge to bare down and birth her baby was beyond her control.

Takeshi wrapped his tail around Inuyasha’s neck yanking Inuyasha from the ground. It constricted his neck, “and when you are done and Sesshomaru is dead. What do you think will happen to that baby?”

Inuyasha threw the sword back at Rin. It landed by her trembling fingers that were gripping the stone cave trying to cope with the urge to push. “AHHHHH!” She screamed, “AHHHH…help me…please,” she sobbed.

_ Get up Rin. _She didn’t understand how she could hear him. She raised her eyes to the entrance. Sesshomaru was fighting on wobbly legs. _Get up. _The voice commanded again.

Rin glared at the sword. It sat just inches from her hands as if taunting her. _I believe in you get up. Save our child. _Rin panted hard, drawing staggered breaths. She drew in as much air into her lungs as she needed to force her body off the ground. She grabbed the hilt and summoned the power inside the sword. The whip wrapped around Takeshi’s neck. She yanked him to the ground. Once freed Inuyasha’s hair turned white. He unsheathed Tetsusaiga and threw a meido directly at Takeshi swallowing the Inu-Yokai whole. Rin threw her sword to the side and screamed in pain as she felt the head descend further from her body. Rin toppled to her side. Inuyasha grabbed her and helped her back onto the floor of the cave. _I did it my love. _

“Kagome!!” Inuyasha called, “hurry! Breathe Rin! It will be ok, you’re not alone, he’s outside.” He helped her back onto her hands and knees.

“Help me,” Rin couldn’t focus. She couldn’t breathe. Her lungs were on fire. Her entire body shook, as if an earthquake was rattling her bones, “help me! AHHHHHH!” The urge to push came again. Her skin stretched as the head steadily slid from her body.

* * *

Sesshomaru suddenly felt the pain stop. He could no longer feel Rin. He pulled himself up from the snow tossing his head and choking through haggard breaths. He shook his head and coughed up blood. It dripped in lines down his cheeks. His legs finally felt like they had regained their former brawn. He was light headed. The snow was splattered with his blood and Touma’s. He sneezed. Blood dripped from his nose as he shook his head trying to clear his throat. For a moment his sight blurred. The world almost turned white. He heard Rin’s screams. He told his body not yet. He wouldn’t leave until he knew she was safe.

Another pink flash flew at Touma. He snarled at Kagome and charged. Sesshomaru found his footing. His paws thundered towards Kagome heading off Touma. He ran at Touma and slammed his head full force into Touma’s side. A wicked snap echoed in the chill winter morning air. Touma’s ribs snapped puncturing his lungs. Touma spewed blood onto the snow.

Rin screams came from the cave nearly blinding Sesshomaru with worry. He slid in front of the cave to block the entrance, nocking Kagome over. He charged Touma one last time, ignoring the blood streaming from his body and the cries from his muscles to stop moving. The blow landed Sesshomaru on his side. He staggered trying to force his body off the forest floor. His body had lost too much blood. _I must end this. Now. _

Kagome pulled herself back up using her bow as a staff. She looked at Sesshomaru struggling against Touma and heard Rin’s feral howls. _I know that sound, _it was the sound of a woman who was pushing. She ran into the cave to help Rin. She skid to Rin’s side dropping her bows and arrows, “stay the way you are Rin. That’s a good way to push.” Kagome gently rubbed Rin’s lower back.

“It hurts,” Rin sobbed, “Kagome help me…ahhh!” She felt the baby’s head and she began to burn. “Help me…it’s burning. It’s burning!” Rin shrieked until she thought her throat was burning. The baby was stretching her. She felt some of the head already escaping her opening.

“Forgive me I need to look,” Kagome pulled Rin’s kimono over her bottom and gave Inuyasha an annoyed look. “Go help O-ni-sama. Half the baby’s head is out.”

“Would you stop calling him that?” Inuyasha put Tetsusaiga over his shoulder and ran out of the cave.

Rin felt like she had no control over her body. She yelled, raised her head and howled. She dug her nails into the stone floor and felt more burning as her child slowly wiggled its way from her body. “Help please. I’m so scared.”

“Here chew on this,” Kagome took some of the herbs, “this will help with bleeding, it will be over soon.” She rubbed Rin’s back. “It’s okay. The baby is coming. You’re doing fine.”

“Where is Sesshomaru? I want him…please I want Sesshomaru.” She sobbed. Her knees ached. Her back burned.

“He’s outside. Take a deep breath until the next wave comes.” Kagome placed the cloths beneath Rin’s legs, “the baby has pointy ears like Inuyasha,” Kagome gently touched the baby’s head. The eyes were still closed. “The hair is white like her father’s Rin. Do you want to touch the face?”

“Why isn’t it coming out?” Rin’s body was trembling. She felt like her back was on fire. She was sure her arms were going to give out on her any moment.

“It will soon. Your body is just taking a break. Just breathe for now,” Kagome saw the baby turn from facing head down to the side. Rin burst out in a savage roar. The shoulders slithered out.

Kagome finally saw the baby’s forehead, “oh look a moon!” Kagome supported the baby’s body with her hands, “you’re doing great Rin, it’s almost over.”

“I want Sesshomaru,” Rin screamed, feeling like she could not control her body it was as if a primal force took over. The rest of the body slipped from Rin’s. Her arms finally buckled. Her chin hit the ground. She rest her face against her hands exhausted. Kagome helped Rin back up. In one swift motion Kagome handed Rin the baby through her legs. Rin held her mewling baby against her chest, crying in relief. “Did you see what it was?” Rin was shaking.

“Let me help you sit,” Kagome helped Rin lean against the rocks, “I didn’t look. Try to keep your legs open. I still have to deliver the placenta.” She didn’t care that her kimono was open now for all to her see.

Rin opened the baby’s legs and smiled, “a girl.” Rin tried to wipe her tears but more came, “ow…” She groaned, flexing her legs.

“Don’t fight it. That’s the placenta. Just push.” Kagome pushed on Rin’s stomach. Her eyes flashed towards the entrance of the cave. It was a field of crimson.

* * *

Something changed. There was a new smell emanating from the cave. It was Rin’s blood but it smelled different. Something else that made Sesshomaru’s mouth twitch into a smile. He turned his gaze towards the demon bleeding in the snow. Touma’s breath was labored, it came out in puffs of steam. Sesshomaru returned to his human form and drew his sword, “vermin,” he yelled and sent a flash of green to over Touma’s body.

Touma returned to his human form on the forest floor, soaking the white in red. Sesshomaru stumbled over to him and held Bakusaiga at Touma’s neck, “out of respect for our mother I will spare your life.” Sesshomaru coughed. His hand was smeared with blood from his mouth, “If I ever smell you near us again…” His eyes were harsh and cold.

Touma disappeared into the winter air. Sesshomaru began panting. He dropped Bakusaiga in the snow and fell to his knees. Inuyasha ran to his side. Sesshomaru couldn’t breathe. The blood was in his throat, suffocating him. His clawed hand touched his neck. Blood spewed from the open wound marring the stripes on his wrists. He felt it bubbling in the back of his throat each time he gasped for air. He closed his eyes in attempt to will the wounds shut, but they didn’t respond. He collapsed forward onto the snow.

Inuyasha rolled him over. “Sesshomaru?” Inuyasha touched the wound on the neck. His eyes dilated in fear. The wound was deep and seething.

Sesshomaru looked at the sky. The snow was falling. It was morning. The sky was streaked pink and purple. It was beautiful. The clouds looked like a vision from heaven. He gripped Tensaiga in his left hand. He tried swallowing to remove the blood from his throat only for more to flow in its place. He smelled it. New life from the cave, he closed his eyes for a moment. His child was born on a beautiful winter morning. His lips quivered as his body sunk further into shock.

“Kagome!!” Inuyasha howled, “Kagome!!” He pulled Sesshomaru’s armor off and opened his white haori. It whipped in the wind. Like the gash in his neck, the slashes in the stomach were deep and unrelenting. His life-force fled from his body.

Sesshomaru’s eyes closed again. His breathing became shallower.

Inuyasha slapped Sesshomaru’s face, “don’t you dare! I won’t stand for it,” he shook Sesshomaru by the shoulders, “keep your eyes open.”

Sesshomaru attempted to take Tenseiga halfway from his waist. His arms felt weak and unsteady. His fingers laced the hilt feebly. Black specks covered the edges of his vision. The world was getting dark. “Don’t…strike,” he coughed flushing his throat with fresh blood, “until…see.”

“See what? Sesshomaru, until I see what? Sesshomaru! Baka!” Inuyasha slapped Sesshomaru’s face again. Sesshomaru’s golden eyes were wide open, but nothing was behind them. His chest stopped rising and falling. His mouth was only loosely open. “Until I see what?” He begged in disbelief. “Until I see what?”

Kagome ran into the snow. She threw her bag from her shoulder and touched Sesshomaru’s neck, “I don’t feel anything.”

“The breathing thing you do. Kagome do it,” desperation was taking over. “Make him breathe.”

“I can’t,” her lips pursed together to stop the tears in her eyes, “this laceration goes all the way through his neck into his windpipe. The air would go from his mouth out the wound in his neck. I would have to be a surgeon. A special doctor in my time to close it,” Kagome’s eyes filled with liquid sorrow, “I’m sorry Inuyasha. I don’t even know if it would work on him! We don’t have Yokai in my time. We can try the herbs?” She didn’t even know if that would work.

Inuyasha took Tenseiga in his hand, “what do I strike? He said not strike until I see but he couldn’t finish.”

“Can’t his Yoki save him? He survived Kaze no Kizu, getting his arm cut off and being impaled twice by Magatsuhi! Can’t he recover from this?” Kagome was trying to convince herself more than Inuyasha.

“Baka!” Inuyasha shook Sesshomaru by the shoulders again. Sesshomaru’s eyes were open, his pupils small and fixed. The gold was fading quickly. “Ni-san!! Ni-san!!” Inuyasha fell on top of his brother’s body, “you could never manage a simple thank you, but somehow we learned to stop hating each other. What am I going to tell Rin?”

Kagome crumpled to her knees next to Inuyasha. She reached out an unsure hand to his shoulder. “He had a daughter. A little girl. She looks like him. She has stripes and moon. He didn’t even get to see her.”

Inuyasha could barely breathe through his sobs, “it wasn’t supposed to be like this.” Inuyasha touched Sesshomaru’s left hand, “he’s getting cold.”

“He can’t be…” Rin stood behind them hugging her new baby to her chest, “no,” she shook her head, her eyes seared with tears, “no…”

“I’m so sorry, Rin,” Kagome caught Rin by the shoulders as she launched herself at Sesshomaru’s fallen body.

“Please,” Rin begged. She moved Sesshomaru’s head back and forth and traced his lips with fingers that were met with nothing. No warm air. No signs of life. She tried to wipe the blood that had pooled around Sesshomaru’s mouth. The baby shrieked in her arms. Rin reached towards his eyes and closed his eyelids. “He looks like he is sleeping. He never slept. He said he didn’t need to. But he never left me at night.” She kissed his cold lips, “please, don’t leave me now.” She held her daughter close to her chest. The only thing she had left of her beloved. “Please, come back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave Kudos or comments! I love hearing from my readers. As of right now I have 277 views and 7 kudos, no comments. Please please oh please kudo me. It takes two seconds. Guest, or member doesn't matter. I love talking to my readers.


	7. Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inuyasha tries to save Sesshomaru with Tenseiga. The action has unexpected consequences.

Rin shivered clutched their silver haired daughter against her chest in one hand and held her lover’s face to her breast with the other. The paltry infant protested against the pressure surrounding her. Her small body was covered with a tattered rag, torn from the remains of Rin’s brown kimono. Rin ran her fingers through the damp silver hair. She raised her hand, rubbing her fingers across his cheek bone just underneath the sunken in fixed golden eyes, “please, my love. Don’t leave me,” she lowered her nose against his, nuzzling his face affectionately. “We have a daughter,” she wiped her nose. “Look,” she raised the baby to his absent globes. “She looks like you, she looks like you,” her face fell against his. “Sesshomaru,” she trembled against him.

“I don’t accept this,” Inuyasha sat on knees wiping his eyes. He took Tenseiga from Sesshomaru’s obi, “I don’t accept this! You have a child! You can’t leave her to grow up without you! Not like me. If oyaji had been there to help me, I wouldn’t have been so angry all the time. I wouldn’t have felt so alone in this world,” Inuyasha gripped Tenseiga’s hilt with unsure hands. He forced himself off his knees, “he could have explained why he gave me Tetsusaiga. It could have stopped us from hating each other. I would know how to control my yoki! What am I supposed to see?” He looked up and down Sesshomaru’s blood soaked, lacerated body. Large puffs of fluffy white snow whipped their way through the cold blowing wind landing on his death chilled skin. Inuyasha saw nothing, just a limp body against crimson snow. “What am I supposed to see!?” He yelled at the air surrounding them. “Rin did he ever tell you what he saw?”

Rin shook her head. She pulled herself up slightly off Sesshomaru, “I never asked.” She pulled the baby out from her breast. The baby’s striped cheeks wrinkled into a grimace as flakes of snow dropped onto them. “My love, please? She needs her father. I need you. Inuyasha please,” Rin begged him, “please save him.”

“I don’t know how,” Inuyasha stammered, “what the hell am I supposed to see. Sesshomaru!” He kicked his brother in the side to try to stir him. Dammit!” Inuyasha booted a mound of snow in frustration. “Dammit! I don’t know what to do…I don’t know what to do,” he gripped Tenseiga tighter. _Oyaji help me…show me…_Inuyasha closed his eyes tightly, his breath was rapid and drawn, _father please. _The wind blew again kicking snow into the air. _Help me save him. Help me._

Kagome reached down for Rin’s arm, “it’s snowing,” she spoke tepidly, “the baby could get sick. Come back in the cave.” Kagome helped Rin up on her knees.

“I can’t leave him,” Rin sobbed into Kagome’s shoulder. “Please Kagome-sama, I can’t. I don’t know how.”

“Inuyasha, we need to go inside,” Kagome touched his shoulder.

“No,” Inuyasha kept his eyes closed. He reached out with his yoki into the hilt of the sword. “I won’t give up.” Inuyasha felt something flow through his hand. Tenseiga pulsed quietly against his palms. Another gust of wind blew past them kicking up a snow flurry. When the mist subsided Inuyasha denied the vision of his eyes. Standing over Sesshomaru was Inu no Taisho. The elder demons eyes surveyed his fallen son’s body. Golden eyes reddened around the edges. A single tear fell from the corner of his father’s eyes. Inu No Taisho held out one hand, _watch, son. _Like a fog lifting from his eyes, Inuyasha saw them covering Sesshomaru’s body. Two were green and three were blue. Their gnarled hands held pitchforks, stabbing at Sesshomaru’s life force. They looked like mini-Jaken’s robbing Sesshomaru of his strength. “Is that what I am supposed to strike?” Inuyasha quelled in frustration. _Strike, son. _He lifted Tenseiga into the air feeling his yoki combine with the katana, he slashed into their bodies leaving nothing behind. His skin tingled. His hands felt like they were sizzling. Inuyasha waited for any sign of life. Then he heard it, the soft thudding of Sesshomaru’s heart, followed by his brother’s hand coming to his neck and feeling for the wound. He coughed bringing up the last of the blood that was stuck his throat. He spat it on the ground next to him.

“Sesshomaru?” Rin’s eyes dilated seeing her lover begin to move. She suddenly felt light headed. She wavered in Kagome’s arms holding her head. Black specks covered her vision as her body collapsed.

Sesshomaru rose off the ground fast enough to catch her before she hit the cold forest floor. Sesshomaru’s eyes fell onto the baby in Rin’s hand. His mouth was agape. She looked similar to him. One slash of magenta on each cheek that faded near her ears. A crescent moon of the same color on her forehead and silver hair. He stroked the pointed white ears on the infant’s head and traced the three tiger stripes that ran across her belly. He shirked off his outer haori and sat down in the snow. He leaned Rin against his lap. He ripped off the blood soaked white silken material until he had a large enough square to wrap his child inside of. When he was finished he pulled Rin to his chest, breathing a sigh of relief against her exhausted forehead.

Kagome bent over and stretched her arms out, “let me take the baby. We need to get them out of the cold.”

Sesshomaru growled at Kagome. She backed away with her hands at her side. He pulled his Mokomoko open around his shoulder and placed the small bundle inside so her back was curled into his white tail and her face was snuggled into the crook of his shoulder. He adjusted it, so he could see her little face. Her hands were cold. She whined against him. He lifted Rin into his arms and walked back into the cave to escape the rapidly falling snow. It was piling fast and thick. Rin’s body convulsed in his arms. She shook forcefully against his chest. “Is she okay?” His eyes entreated Kagome, “Miko?” He stopped at the mouth of the cave.

Kagome touched Rin’s forehead, “she doesn’t have a temperature. Set her down, I need to check her injuries.”

_ Injuries? _His eyes betrayed his emotions. _She was hurt?_ He hadn’t noticed before, the gash in her head, the cut along her cheek. He felt furious, confused, lost and empty all at once. His emotions were coming so swiftly, he could not make sense of them. He felt worry for Rin, disgust at her smell. She smelled like Touma. A warmth was spreading in his chest at the hanyou that he carried against his shoulder.

“Set her down O-ni-sama,” Kagome said again.

Inuyasha entered the cave after them.

Sesshomaru complied, blindly following Kagome deeper into the cave. He found the softest spot on hardened ground to rest Rin’s limp body. Inuyasha proceeded behind him with Tenseiga in hand. Rin had a gash on the top of her head, but that wasn’t where Kagome was checking. Kagome parted Rin’s kimono by her legs. She spread the younger woman’s legs to the sides like a frog. It took more than control for Sesshomaru not to claw Kagome for searching her private parts. Rin continued to convulse. Her opening was red with irritation. Fresh blood slowly oozed from where the baby had made her exit.

“It’s not a seizure,” Kagome pulled the Kimono back down, “and she’s bleeding normally.” Kagome touched Rin’s matted hair and stroked her cheek, “O-ni-sama’s death was too much for her. She’ll be fine. She just needs rest, food and water. If I had what I needed here I would stitch the cut on her forehead.”

“Why does she shake?” He insisted.

“I think she’s cold, and her body is overwhelmed. The stress most likely brought the labor on. She went through most of it alone and scared. You’re lucky O-ni-sama, your Yoki is so powerful. The baby was ready to come. She’s healthy. They both just need to be kept warm until the snow stops. We’ll take them back to the village. You can all recover their.”

“She?” His head felt cloudy, he touched the baby’s cheek. He hadn’t stopped to look between the baby’s leg.

“It’s a girl. You have a daughter,” Kagome smiled at him, “congratulations.”

“Here,” Inuyasha handed Tenseiga to Sesshomaru.

“Leave us,” Sesshomaru’s voice was hoarse. He took Tenseiga in his hand knowing that he crossed to the underworld and stood on deaths door. He hoisted Rin up against his chest and found a more secluded area to lay her down. Her grew the second part of his mokomoko and placed her on top of it, slowly wrapping her shivering arms and legs in his warmth. She was covered in sweat. Her kimono was cold and damp from being in the snow. Her lips held a blue sheen around the edges. Sesshomaru rest with his back against the wall breathing heavily. It was too much, all of it was too much. He didn’t understand his emotions.

“Can’t even bother with a thank you,” Inuyasha puffed and walked away.

“We should build a fire before it gets any colder. You need to find food for Rin,” Kagome hugged Inuyasha around the waist. “I have a few water bottles in the bag. She’s exhausted.” Kagome nuzzled Inuyasha’s neck, “are you okay?”

“I saw my father,” he looked at his hands. Light burn marks ran along his palms, “I thought I lost him. I didn’t realize…” Inuyasha refused to finish. He shook his head.

Kagome embraced him, “it’s okay now. I’ll treat those,” she pulled his lips down to hers. “Something is wrong with Sesshomaru,” Kagome said inaudibly by Inuyasha’s ear. “He doesn’t look well. It’s like something is missing.” 

* * *

Sesshomaru sat wrapped in the darkness of the cave. To the side he could see the slight glimmer of Rin’s katana. It bore into his soul like an ore. It was responsible for the wounds he had sustained. His hand, the hand of the great Sesshomaru, trembled touching his stomach where it had been torn open. His skin was whole where his insides had threatened to slip from the deep gash. He felt his neck where the laceration had drowned him in his own blood. The dull taste was still in his mouth dancing across his taste buds like a sick requiem. Near his chest against his right shoulder life wiggled and mewled softly. He took in her smell. She was finally calming down. This little baby, _my daughter. _He needed answers, but Rin was not in a state to go with him and he was too consumed by what happened to even voice the words. “Rin,” he stroked her hair meekly, using his claws to comb back her matted hair and reveal the gash on her head. He dug his thumbnail into the tip of his index finger until he blood was drawn and gingerly sprinkled several drops onto the cut and the deep gash on her cheek. He rested his head against the wall of the cave and looked at the ceiling, _what have I done?_

* * *

He allowed Rin to sleep until the squalling, squirming child against his shoulder would not be soothed. “Rin, wake up,” he caressed her cheek softly and touched her bottom lip with his thumb. Rin’s eyes opened slowly. She rubbed them and sat up with a start. Tears flooded her vision. She launched herself into Sesshomaru’s chest, “you’re alive?” She wrapped her arms around his trunk holding him tightly, “my love.” She tried to pull his mouth down to hers.

He couldn’t move. Something had shifted within him. It suddenly felt wrong for a human to be clinging to him as she was. His skin was crawling. He removed the child from his mokomoko and passed her roughly to Rin. Rin took the infant and pulled open the front of her kimono. She helped the baby’s mouth find her areola and stroked the child’s cheek as she fed. The baby gulped and swallowed eagerly. Rin settled her back against Sesshomaru’s shoulder. When he inhaled, the scent, made him feel nauseas. Rin’s blood smelled wrong to him.

_ What’s happening? _The last seven months played in his mind. His eyes pitching red, his body combining with hers. How his heart went from empty to full, finding solace in her arms. He thought of the days they spent looking for the most powerful yokai for him to kill and the evenings where Rin could turn any space into a haven for them. After she made herself dinner, each night he led her to the bed of furs and removed her clothing. He found himself drawn to her, moving inside of her, filling her body with his seed, covering her with his scent. _Something feels wrong. _He shook his head. He tried inhaling her scent only to be repulsed. He covered his eyes. His skin was on fire, his nerves burning. He had to get away.

It was then he noticed Rin staring at him, “are you okay?” Rin reached for her Katana, Sesshomaru grabbed her hand and put it against her chest.

He shook his head, “allow me to be alone with my thoughts.” He knew that look in her eyes. It was the one where spiderwebs of red crept from the irises to the edges of her eyes. She was covered in the bitter scent of hurt. “Leave me.” 

“Okay,” her voice was cracking. She winced bending over, using her free hand to lift herself up from his mokomoko. It was obvious it was taking great effort and she was biting back the pain she felt. She steadied herself on the wall, “are we okay?”

“Yuki.” Sesshomaru answered her raising one knee to his chest.

“What?” Rin nursed the baby using one hand and steading herself with the other against the wall of the cave.

“Call her Yuki. It suits her.”

Rin nodded forcing a half smile on her lips, “I love you.”

His eyes were already a million miles away. He stood up taking Rin’s sword in is hand as he walked towards the entrance of the cave. He stalked quickly ignoring the cries behind him. “Sesshomaru, wait!” Rin tried to follow after him. Her body was in too much pain. She felt an inferno of pain in between her legs. “Sesshomaru! Please,” she tried to grab his hand. “Say something!”

“What are you doing?” Inuyasha tried to block him. Sesshomaru threw him out of the cave. He landed against the wall with a deep thud holding his side.

A familiar hand reached out to his. It grasped the tips of his fingers only long enough for him to pull his hand free and fly into the blizzard. As he flew through the air the snow pelted his eyes. _Nothing but death or deep heart ache can break the bond. I died…the bond is broken. We are no longer bound to each other._

“Sesshomaru!” Rin screamed from the entrance to the cave. “Come back,” she fell to her knees.

* * *

Rin was in a pile on the floor. Kagome tried fruitlessly to comfort her. “Just leave me alone, please,” Rin begged them. Her body ached. Her skin felt like it was burning. Rin touched her forehead, the wound was closed, she knew why. She felt feverish. _He used his blood to heal me._

He had not touched her as they sat together. His body went rigid when she embraced him. It was not the warmth she had experienced over the last seven months. It was like the last seven months hadn’t happened. He didn’t say why he was leaving. He didn’t say if he would come back. It didn’t escape Rin’s eyes that he took her katana with him. Rin folded her legs beneath her and held her new daughter close to her chest. In the background there was the faint smell of crackling wood, and meat cooking.

“You need to eat Rin,” Inuyasha sat down next to her and handed her some meat that had cooled, “we’ll take you two back to the village with us when the snow stops.”

Rin couldn’t speak.

“Force yourself if you have to. If your body is weak it won’t produce milk. Your baby needs you to be strong,” Kagome sat on her other side. “She’s gorgeous Rin.”

“I don’t understand,” Rin cried, “I don’t…he promised. He said he wouldn’t leave like that again.”

“My brother doesn’t make sense most of the time. This least of all,” Inuyasha touched his niece’s ears, “she has my ears.”

“I feel like I can’t breathe,” Rin gasped through tears that refused to stop no matter how hard she tried.

“Lay down,” Kagome told her. Kagome helped her adjust the baby and broke the meat into small bites. “The snow is getting lighter. Aun is still out there. We’ll find him and go back to the village. You can stay with us until your hut is built.”

Rin listened to them listlessly as they planned her life for her. A hut of her own near theirs in the forest where goshinboku bloomed. Their children would play together and maybe he would come back. They reminded her that he had just faced his own death. She heard something about Inuyasha seeing his father, but the words were running together like an angry river and all she wanted to do was sleep. The baby at her breast felt like she was sucking the life from her. Suddenly she felt very tired. Rin closed her eyes, hoping it was all a dream and that she would wake up in his arms, wrapped in the love he had showered her with for the last seven months, not alone in a dark cave, knowing that he died in front of her eyes and then walked away when she needed him most.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What the hell? Why did he leave? Will he come back?
> 
> When I wrote this on FF it got some interesting reactions. I have never believed Sesshomaru would blindly fall in love and never regret his choice to be with a human. The way he is written in the manga and anime and his complete animosity towards hanyous and humans, at some point it would have to be faced. 
> 
> Please remember to leave kudos and comments! I love hearing from my readers :)


	8. Answers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin returns to the village with Inuyasha and Kagome. Sesshomaru receives a vision from his father.
> 
> Okay this is my favorite chapter :). I think you'll figure out why.
> 
> On a personal note, due to personal life stuff, so much fun. I probably won't put up another chapter for a week or two. Sorry to keep everyone waiting.

Sesshomaru soared towards the first body of water he could find. It mattered not what it was as long as it was something that he could wash the taste of blood from his mouth. His blood. The blood that had bubbled in his throat and drown him. His neck was still covered in dried bits of his life-force along with his stomach that had been shredded. His haori was in tatters. He never understood how his father had been weak enough to allow himself to die at the hands of an enemy. Sesshomaru had done exactly that, only his hanyou brother had been there to wield Tetsusaiga and save him. He looked at Rin’s sword tied to his hip in disgust. This thing had cost him his life. This blade that connected them, allowed him to feel what she was feeling, was the cause of his death. Loving a human caused his death. He would not let it happen again. He landed softly next to a pond, stripped himself of his armor, swords and inner layer. The ice chill washed over his neck and stomach causing his skin to contract from the cold, revealing chiseled muscles. He splashed the water into his mouth gargled it and spit it out, but the metallic taste of blood remained deep in his throat. He considered making himself throw up to wash the disturbing smell away. A blizzard was brewing. Snow fell in droves. For a brief second his mind went to the infant he had left behind. Yuki…snow. She smelled of snow when he held her. She was tiny, so vulnerable and his. He had fathered what he swore not to. He forced his mind back to the present as he crouched next to the pond with his chest exposed. He splashed the glacial water over the dried flakes of blood on his middle.

Sesshomaru did not feel cold. He did not feel heat. The elements did not affect him. He put his inner layer back on and sat down under the tallest tree he could find. Its branches reached towards the sky covered in flakes of snow. It stood tall and proud. He closed his eyes. His body felt heavy and tired. _This what it feels like to be revived. At least the hanyou figured it out. _He reached a timid hand to his chest. His heart was still beating but it felt tight, and strangely empty. Sesshomaru didn’t want to take the time to examine the feeling further. He would move again soon but for now he allowed the crisp winter air to chill his lungs, and exhale steam that came from his lips. It was too late to take back the last seven months, to undo what had happened in the throes of passion. Yuki came into his mind, the small infant that was made from his pure blood. She sported the same stripes along her face as his and the crescent moon on his forehead. She smelled of sweet spring flowers and crisp winter air mixed together. She reminded him of the last snow before the first spring sun rose. Sesshomaru lashed out at a nearing tree. He could not return to Rin. Not like this but his heart would not allow him to abandon the child either, or she would end up as pathetic as his hanyou brother. Eventually he would return. Eventually.

As he sat contemplating what he should do a flash of light struck against the morning air and then his mother appeared before him in a cloud. She had a new Haori, that looked like the one he wore before, folded neatly in his arms. “You spared Touma. I thought you would kill him.” She handed him the haori and touched her son’s cheek.

“Should he approach us again, there will not be another chance.”

The Lady Mother grabbed her son’s chin. She turned his face from side to side. It was clear she was in shock. Sesshomaru batted her hands off him. “What did you do?”

He looked away. She saw it too, but he would not grace her with an explanation. Tenseiga pulsed at his side as if betraying him. Before his mother could speak Sesshomaru rose from the snow and flew into the air without giving her a second glance. Rin’s katana was tightly gripped in his hand. He looked at the sky and flew to Totosai.

* * *

The snow stopped three long days later. Rin was grateful for the break. Inuyasha in that time was able to find Aun and they spent the evenings curled against the great beast trying to stay warm while the wind howled with a ferocity outside. Rin’s body was less sore as the days passed but she still couldn’t sit comfortably. She was looking forward to the warmth of a hearth, a bamboo mat on the wooden floors and a warm blanket to cover with and something to eat besides wild boar meat. She slept fitfully, not knowing where Sesshomaru was. She tried to remind herself of the independent woman she was before. The one that fought and slayed demons. Not the emotional wreck that had just birthed a baby and could barely get off the floor or go to the bathroom without being reduced to tears.

On that third morning when the snow finally ceased and the air was still, Rin bundled Yuki into Sesshomaru’s haori that he left tightly wrapping her and slid Yuki into the front of her tattered kimono against her skin for warmth. Aun bowed graciously, lowering his scaled body to the rough ground of the cave in submission, allowing Rin the ease of just flopping on his back. Inuyasha rode behind Rin to help steady her and Kagome held tightly to Inuyasha’s stomach. They rode for hours. The trip took most of the day. They only stopped to eat once. Inuyasha warned that he smelled more snow coming and that by nightfall they should be back to their hut.

Rin sat slumped against Inuyasha’s chest. Kagome was in front of her attempting to direct Aun towards the village. They had been flying for hours. Rin started with more energy than she thought, but after being upright for so long, her body was beginning to ache. There was too much pressure on her backside. She shifted uncomfortably in the saddle trying to change where she felt the most pressure. Her hand flitted up to the hem of her kimono and checked on the tiny squealing baby that slept fitfully against her breast. Yuki was sweating and moaning softly. Rin felt guilty leaning as heavily against Inuyasha as she was, but when Kagome looked back and gently rubbed her knee, she knew it was okay. Yuki was five days old now. Sesshomaru had been gone for five days and Rin still didn’t know where. She tried to hold out hope that he would return, that he would come back to them. Wouldn’t he?

Aun landed in front of Kaede’s hut. “Stay here Inuyasha. I want to see if Rin’s hut is finished. I don’t think Rin can sit up on her own.”

Rin just shook her head. Inuyasha felt warm but his chest wasn’t nearly as inviting as Sesshomaru’s. “Sorry Inuyasha,” Rin whispered weakly. Her arms and legs were on fire. Her body was simultaneously recovering from the birth of her child and the battle she fought while Yuki was being born. Her rip cage felt like it was going to break each time she moved. Her hands had callouses on them from how hard she had held onto her sword in the last few fights. Her hand went to her hip only to be reminded that Sesshomaru took the sword with him when he left. Rin tried to force back more tears. _Sesshomaru? Where are you?_

Kagome disappeared into the hut and returned with a wool blanket she threw over Rin’s shoulders. Inuyasha adjusted it to make sure she was covered completely, “just rest okay?” Inuyasha told her. “He’ll come back.” Inuyasha patted her head like he did when Rin was a child.

Kaede hobbled out of the hut leaning heavily on her staff. She took in Rin’s form. Rin’s hair was matted against her head. There was soft cooing coming from within her kimono. Rin leaned heavily on Inuyasha and looked as if she would fall over from exhaustion if he didn’t prop her up, “where is _the father?”_ There was venom in those words.

Kagome gave a sympathetic look to Rin. Rin bit her lip as the tears ran down her cheeks. She shook her head.

Inuyasha also did not speak.

Kaede tightened her grip on her staff, “Rin I thought I taught you better than this,” she hobbled down the steps. “Come on Aun. Your hut is ready Rin. You can stay there or here with me.”

“I’d rather be alone. Jaken!” The sight of the little toad filled Rin’s chest to bursting. At least there was someone who had seen the last six months between her and Sesshomaru.

Jaken came running from the hut waving Nintojo, “where is Sesshomaru-sama?”

Rin bit her lip again. She wished her eyes would stop burning.

Inuyasha adjusted his grip on Rin, “we need to get them inside. Aun, go to my forest,” Inuyasha instructed the two headed dragon.

Kaede stepped forward and took Aun’s reigns, “I’ll lead him. Rin, we will talk about this.”

Jaken jumped onto Aun’s back. Yuki whined against Rin’s chest. “Is that the baby?” Jaken turned around and asked Rin.

Rin smiled weakly, “yes,” her voice was getting softer, “he named her Yuki.”

“Yuki, this Jaken is proud. Where is he?” Jaken’s voice was as low as Rin’s.

“I don’t know,” Rin answered.

The words weren’t lost to Kaede. Kagome followed next to the big dragon, “how are Miroku and Sango?” Kagome inquired.

“Healing. I sent Shippo for the children. They should be back in a few days.” Kaede informed Kagome.

They arrived at the forest. There Rin found a rather sizeable hut. “Is this for me?”

“It was for you and Sesshomaru-sama,” Kaede fumed, “come on get down.”

“I’ll help you, take the baby out,” Inuyasha instructed Rin.

Rin removed Yuki from the warmth of her chest and handed her to Jaken, “she looks like her father,” she cried softly.

Jaken took the baby in his green hands. His mouth wide open. His eyes wide, “she does look like Sesshomaru-sama. Look at these stripes and the crescent moon,” he carried the baby proudly into the hut.

Inuyasha lifted Rin into his arms and carried her up the steps. “Oi Jaken, make yourself useful,” he hefted Rin over to a bed of furs and set her down, “use that staff to make a fire. There’s wood around the back of the hut. I want to go check on Miroku and Sango. Are you going to be okay here alone?”

“I have Yuki and Jaken,” Rin looked at the entrance of the hut and swallowed hard, “and Kaede-sama.”

“I’ll come check on you later. I’ll bring you some dinner,” Kagome patted Rin’s arm and left with Inuyasha.

“Thank you, for everything,” Rin said as they exited her hut. Jaken busied himself bringing in wooden logs to light the fire in the center of the hut. Kaede kneeled down next to Rin. Rin latched Yuki onto her breast and tried her best not to look guilty, “it’s not like that, Kaede-sama.”

“Then what is it like child? You know women do not do this unless they are married. Not even with Dai-Yokai like Sesshomaru-sama. What were you thinking?” Kaede touched the pointed cat-like ears at the top of Yuki’s head, “Inuyasha’s ears.”

“Don’t compare the offspring of the great Sesshomaru to that pathetic hanyou,” Jaken yelled as he waved Nintojo over the logs. The fire slowly warmed the frozen hut.

“He loves me,” Rin’s voice didn’t sound like her own, _does he still? _“He bound me to him, in the yokai way. It never felt like we needed a wedding.”

Kaede looked confused for a moment. She touched Rin’s cheek, “there is yoki inside of you.”

“Of course there would be. Inu-yokai bind their soulmates to them,” Jaken fussed as he came over, “oh she is beautiful Rin, just like her father,” he swooned. “Sesshomaru-sama’s yoki will remain inside of Rin until the bond is broken or he dies and even then it takes many months for the remaining yoki to dissipate completely.”

“The villagers are already talking. He disappears for two years without a word then comes back and this is what happens? It would be different if he came with you. Like this they are going to think that you acted inappropriately.”

“He came back last year. What do you mean two years?” Jaken barked at Kaede.

Rin flushed red and glared at Jaken. No one except Inuyasha and Kohaku knew about that. Well Kohaku told Sango and Inuyasha told Kagome, but Rin had never told Kaede what Sesshomaru did a year before under the light of the full moon.

“He came last year?” Kaede put her hands on her hips, “we need to wash you, you’re filthy,” she touched Rin’s hair. “What happened last year? You never said any…you didn’t.”

“We didn’t,” Rin felt like a child again, “he just…well…”

“Were his eyes red then?” Jaken asked.

“How did you know?” Rin’s mouth dropped.

“He’d been agitated since that trip. More short tempered than usual, like something was missing,” Jaken gave a shy smile, “you think I didn’t notice that things were more difficult? That you were blushing more? That his gifts were getting more lavish? I thought I was going to have to spell it out to him. Rin he loves you. If he left I’m sure he’ll return. I have been in his service for a hundred years. He has never even considered loving a single woman the way he loves you. He has treated none with the kindness he has you. You are his soulmate. He will not abandon you.”

“What happened? Rin, the villagers are talking and it’s not for the good,” Kaede raised her voice causing the baby to whimper.

“Let them talk. I’m tired,” Rin hinted to Kaede, “can you lecture me after I’ve rested?”

“I’ll bring you some food from my hut. Kagome will make everyone dinner. Until then Jaken, can I trust you to care for her? When did you have the baby?”

“Five days ago,” she traced the lines on Yuki’s cheek, “she’s five days old today.” More tears came from her eyes leaving paths of white skin through her dirt stained cheeks.

“Jaken she needs to rest laying down for at least a week. Child why are you so sad?” Kaede touched Rin’s cheek, “did he leave you?”

“He wouldn’t,” Jaken intoned.

“Kaede-sama,” Rin hugged the old woman tightly.

“He couldn’t, the bond wouldn’t let him,” Jaken argued.

“He did,” Rin sobbed against Kaede.

* * *

The smell of sulfur pervaded the air. Sesshomaru landed near Totosai’s house and walked in through the jagged tooth entrance. The sword maker sat cross legged as he always did blowing fire onto a blade. The blade glowed orange and red while Totosai pounded on it. Sesshomaru walked in and threw Rin’s katana down onto the ground next to Totosai, “break it.” He demanded.

“Break what?” Totosai scratched his head. His bulbous eyes sparkling.

“You know what. The connection, break it.” Sesshomaru was annoyed. He grabbed Totosai by the neck, “break it now.”

Totosai picked up the sword, unsheathed it, licked it, and then put it back, “I can’t. I didn’t make the connection.” He threw the sword back at Sesshomaru. “If you want it broken, break it yourself.”

Sesshomaru ground his teeth and flexed his claws in frustration, “explain?”

Totosai sat back down continued with the blade he had been working on, “when you brought the fang to me, you asked me to make a katana from a baby fang that Rin could wield that would give her the power to protect herself from stronger Yokai. It had to come from a baby fang or else your Yoki would kill her. I didn’t understand why you felt the need to make such a sword. Rin was safe. When I asked if you had shared a part of yourself with Rin, I bet you thought it was the Yokai blood that you used to close the wound on her stomach. I felt the sword begin to wake up a year before that. So let me ask you again, what happened between you and Rin?”

He thought back to that moonlit night. When he had first initiated intimacy with Rin. When the moon shown down on her naked body. He was entranced by her strength and independence, the lack of need she had for him. His eyes had changed signaling him in a deep and primal way that she was suited to him. He started it then? “You’re saying I created the connection? So I have to break it? How?”

“Why are you so desperate Sesshomaru?” Totosai dared to ask. He purposely ignored the previous question.

Sesshomaru pointed his claws at Totosai, “I tire of your games.”

“It’s a matter of thought Sesshomaru. Something made you desperate then. Something is making you desperate now. Let go of your desperation and the connection will no longer be necessary.” With that Totosai deflected the poison coming his way with a large blast of fire. “You might as well let me take one of your fangs now Sesshomaru.” Totosai approached Sesshomaru cautiously with a pair of plyers.

“What are you talking about?” Now he was seething. He clamped his mouth closed, refusing to bare his fangs at the old sword maker.

“I hear you are a father now. Go on open up,” he tried to coax the stubborn dog demon, “it’ll grow back in a few hours.”

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes and walked away, out of the elder demons home and into a void of his own making. He didn’t understand. He still felt empty, like something was missing.

_Desperate? Me…never._ With questions unanswered, Sesshomaru left for his next destination. Bokuseno, deep in the forest near what used to be his father’s lands. He took Rin’s katana with him determined to break their connection through the damn thing and return it to her. Whatever happened next. Wherever he ended up, she deserved the protection it afforded her. The forests were riddled with Yokai and then there were the human thieves that were unrelenting during the time. Alive for more than 900 years and he had seen the worst of them during this time. Sesshomaru allowed the night air to wash over his body as he flew. His mind was a fury of thoughts he didn’t understand. All he knew was that the bond he created was now broken. He was free from loving a human. Free from sharing his body with her but a cold emptiness remained. It was if his heart was beating but the blood was cold, like he was missing a part of himself. _Tenseiga, was something left behind when you brought me back?_

* * *

Rin settled into her new home. Kaede made sure she spent most of the time resting. Which was a relief after how the baby made her entrance. Yuki was not an easy baby at all. Kagome and Sango both tried to share their own experience with their less than easy children, but it didn’t help. Yuki cried most nights, non-stop not allowing Rin to rest. Her nipples were sore from nursing. Her body was achy from fighting while giving birth. Jaken was her one constant companion.

One evening as the fire burned low, Rin was laying down on the wooden floor next to the square fire pit nursing Yuki. Jaken sat nearby eating some soup. Outside Rin could hear Aun. The snow was still fierce and bitter cold had finally come. It was nearly impossible for her to leave her hut. Rin gazed towards the door, “he hasn’t come yet,” she said mostly to herself. Part of her believed that Sesshomaru would walk through the door flap at any moment.

“He wasn’t at the cave where you told me either. To think I am stuck here caring for a human and hanyou,” Jaken’s eyes glazed over on their own comprehending what he said, “don’t tell him I said that?”

“Why? Because he’ll boot you across the room for referring to his daughter as a hanyou?” Rin tried to make herself laugh.

“She looks like her father,” Jaken retorted, “not a hanyou.” The words came out proudly.

Rin touched Yuki’s pointed ears, “liar. Her ears betray her heritage.”

“Her human mother betrays her heritage,” Kaede rocked nearby in a chair drinking a warm cup of steaming tea. “Jaken give Rin some tea. She needs to stay warm.”

“Thank you Jaken,” she smiled at him, “I’m still so tired.” Rin was getting exasperated with the constant sleeping and laying down all day but Kaede insisted that she should spend a week in bed before she started moving around. “I feel so empty without him.” Rin said half to herself. She yearned for her katana to know what he was feeling. She wondered if she did, could she discern why he left the day Yuki was born. He cared enough to name her and then left, like his life depended on it. _Where are you my love? Where? _She closed her eyes.

“You need to sleep Rin,” Kaede spoke kindly.

Rin tried to smile. “I’ll try.”

Jaken scurried in front of Rin. “You’re holding back Rin.” He kept his tone low so that Kaede’s old ears wouldn’t hear.

“Please Jaken-sama. I can’t keep crying for him,” she shut her eyes tight. “You are connected him? Please…tell him to come back. Is he okay?”

Jaken laughed, “of course he is okay. I cannot feel his feelings. We only share thoughts at times. If I focus I can sense him. He is alive.”

“I need him,” Rin stroked the downy fine silver hair of her daughter.

“I’m sorry,” Jaken sighed. “You are bound to each other. He will return.”

She sniffled quietly to herself.

* * *

Two weeks had passed. The emptiness in his heart persisted. He expected his heart to hurt but instead it simply felt hollow. While travelling to Bukoseno’s forest he attempted to find a demon or two to hack down. The fire of battle did not fill his heart. He dispatched of his enemies efficiently and then his mind went back to the emptiness. He glared at the sword he had made for her. The connection had nearly cost him his life. Touma should never have been able to corner him and tear into his neck. He found Bukoseno’s forest and landed. He walked slowly through the snow and maneuvered his way through the maze of thick trees.

The crisp scent of winter filled his nose. He closed his eyes and steadied himself on a tree. The little hanyou he had created, he couldn’t forget her scent, or the way she looked like him. The moon on her forehead, the stripes on her little body, all signs that she had been fathered by a demon. He remembered the way she squirmed against his shoulder when he wrapped her in his fur. He named her Yuki for the snow falling when she was born. He shouldn’t have left her.

“So, you’ve come at last,” Bukoseno appeared from the maple tree. His face was carved with lines. His branches were like hands, extending from himself.

“You expected me again?” Sesshomaru scoffed in disbelief. The old magnolia always believed he knew exactly when Sesshomaru would be coming. “As if you predicted these events.”

“Word on the wind is that you fathered a hanyou. I thought your pride would have prevented you from that,” Bukoseno laughed at the dog demon. “Come now, don’t be so angry at yourself. That is after all why you’ve come? That little girl you brought to me so many years ago. She opened your heart and you feel like the opening has made you weak. Before you could think through the consequences you allowed yourself to bond with her, body and soul.” Bukoseno looked into Sesshomaru’s eyes and gasped, “you broke the bond? What did you do?” The tree incredulously gaped.

Sesshomaru didn’t speak. He only folded his arms in his sleeves. He did feel weak. If he was true to the nagging feeling in the back of his mind. He felt as if his love for Rin had bathed him in frailty. All he could think of during the battle was the pain she was experience and the helplessness of not being able to take it from her.

“So why did you come Sesshomaru?” Bukoseno seemed to smile.

Sesshomaru took out Rin’s katana, “break the connection.”

Bukoseno stroked his chin in deep thought. His branches were thicker than Sesshomaru remembered. They were gnarled and curved and swept into boughs. “You left something behind in the afterlife,” Bukoseno finally spoke, “but you are an arrogant one aren’t you Sesshomaru? You thought because you are who you are, that you would never meet an enemy who could defeat you.”

Sesshomaru ignored that comment. Touma was not on his level. Touma was far beneath Sesshomaru. It was something else plaguing him. It was gnawing away at his existence. “Empty,” he spoke the single bitter word. “I feel empty. And Touma should never have been able to challenge me.”

Bukoseno started cackling. “You really think there isn’t always someone stronger than you? There will always be someone more powerful than you. But that isn’t what brought you here. You left something behind in the afterlife. Something Tenseiga wielded by a hanyou lacked the yoki to carry back. Something hidden within you.” Bukoseno’s limbs rose into the air.

“Explain?” The inu-yokai demanded.

“Are you sure Sesshomaru?” The trees limbs circled around Sesshomaru gaining speed.

“Explain,” he commanded more furiously.

Bukoseno nodded.

His twisted branches raced over Sesshomaru’s head. Sesshomaru felt something stab into his armor right over his chest. Straight through his heart. He noticed all too late that one of Bukoseno’s limbs impaled him through the chest. Two more slithered around his legs and the final wrapped like a slinking snake around Sesshomaru’s hands forcing them behind his back. Sesshomaru’s face was blank as he struggled against the cords holding him. His golden eyes darted to Bukoseno’s carved face but words would not come. He felt his heart fluttering to maintain his life, then a heaviness in his eyelids. Against his will they slowly began to close.

“Your father told me, when you come cold and empty, to give you his final gift. In order to receive it, you must rest between this life and the next,” a final blow through the torso as blood dripped from Sesshomaru’s chest, the lids over his golden eyes shut.

* * *

His chest was burning. It was aflame in pain. Sesshomaru cautiously opened his eyes. He touched the skin over his heart searching for the limb that had stabbed into his body. Sesshomaru could not see it. His body looked whole but he couldn’t move. It was as if some force held him frozen in a dark room that was tinted in red indignation. His armor and swords were gone. He was dressed in only his white and red outer layer.

He looked up. He couldn’t breathe. Standing before him was his father. He looked the same as the day he died. The armor still wrapped around his arms, his large tail wrapped around his body, long hair tied high above his head and a fierceness that was normally reserved for his enemies.

“Chichue,” Sesshomaru gasped. He tried to stalk to his father only for the limbs binding his legs to tighten.

“Sesshomaru,” he responded. “I wondered how long it would take for you to find someone whose strength rivaled your own.”

“Where are we?” Sesshomaru felt ropes around his legs and hands, pulling him down binding his movements. He struggled to remain upright.

“Between this life and the next.”

“Touma did not rival my strength,” Sesshomaru snarled against the bonds forcing him down, “Rin’s sword,” he grunted in the struggle to stay standing, “the connection crippled me when she…” he couldn’t admit to his father that the very thing he hated his father for, he did himself.

“Fathered a hanyou like your father?” Toga chortled, “you have grown in the last two hundred years. You are a great dai-yokai. I fear your power today would rival that of my own. You still have much to learn about compassion and love.”

Sesshomaru refused to answer. _Love…_images flashed before him. Rin on the side of the mountain face, crippled by a rock. _I love you, _the words had left his mouth. Collapsing in a heap of passion on top of her sweat soaked aching body, _I love you. _Spending weeks by the hot springs waiting for her battered back to heal. _I love you. _It wasn’t true. How could he love her?

“You were in love Sesshomaru,” Toga told him, “but that love was left here. Between the living and the dead. That is why I left this last portion of my soul here for the day where you finally were confronted by your own mortality and in fear and cowardice you left behind your bond,” Inu no Taisho held a bright light in his hand. It flickered streaks of white light in his hand.

“You dare call this Sesshomaru a coward?” Sesshomaru’s eyes flashed red. His fangs grew in anger. He lunged at his father attempting to draw Bakusaiga, forgetting the sword was gone and his body was bound in this strange place. Slow, throbbing pain came from his heart, piercing it, pulsing from the front of his chest into the back. Burning thorns laced his wrists restraining him. He thought he heard the dripping of his blood on the ground. He couldn’t breathe. His lungs were on fire.

“What’s wrong Sesshomaru? Can’t move?” Toga taunted, hands on his hips, “a mere tree has quelled your great power. Here I thought you were the greatest demon of the age and no one could stand against you.”

“I am not a coward,” his teeth ground against his eachother. He roared in rage as he was forced onto his knees. “Release these bonds. I will show you.” Sesshomaru flexed his arms but the bonds holding him refused to shift.

“Does it really matter? If you are as powerful as you think, release yourself. It’s just a tree. Why can’t you free yourself?” His father’s voice was sardonic with ice. Inu no Taisho circled his struggling son as if he was his prey. “Where is your strength Sesshomaru. Show it me? Show it me!” He bellowed. It echoed like thunder off the strange place where he held his son captive.

_Rin…_

“There,” Toga’s eyes lit up. “There is your strength.”

_Rin. _He tried to shake himself free of her name, of the memories that kept attempting to creep into his vision. Rin snuggled against his body. Rin waiting for him by the campfire. Holding her as he felt their baby move for the first time. He pushed his hands forward. He flexed his knees to stand. His bonds would not release him. Sesshomaru’s eyes fell on the light inside of his father’s hand. Defeated he finally mumbled, “I did not purposely leave the bond to Rin behind. The bond cannot be broken without great heart ache or death. I went to the afterlife. I should have known the hanyou couldn’t bring me back whole.” That’s it, it was Inuyasha’s fault. Not his own.

“Your brother cried tears for you? Did you see them?” Toga strode towards Sesshomaru and placed his thumb and palm over the crescent moon on Sesshomaru’s forehead. Sesshomaru snarled. His movements were still restrained. The touch forced Sesshomaru’s eyes shut. The dark room he was in with his father changed to the grove of trees, covered in snow and ice while his body was pelted with nimble snowflakes falling from the skies. He watched himself fighting Touma. Touma delivered a blow to his neck. Blood bubbled in his throat choking him. Inuyasha rolled his body over and tears bled from the hanyou’s eyes. So his little brother did care. Sesshomaru saw the visage of his father guiding Inuyasha’s swing of Tenseiga. The face of Yuki flashed before his eyes. Her crescent moon, the small claws on her hand, “Why are you showing me this?” His mouth was dry. His heart ached. His hands felt numb.

“Watch,” Toga coolly responded.

As the minions from hell were hit a light left Sesshomaru’s heart and flew into the hands of the mirage of his father.

“What was that light?” Sesshomaru challenged. It felt familiar, warm as if it was a piece of himself.

“You don’t know what this is?” Toga snorted. He tossed the ball of light from one hand to the next, back and forth.

Sesshomaru attended the motion with his eyes. “What is it!?” He thundered.

“Your bond to Rin. Your daughter is beautiful by the way,” Toga smiled, “your Yoki courses through her veins. Do you want the bond back?” Toga held it out in his own clawed hand. The bright light contrasted the purple stripes on his wrists.

“Is it that simple?” Sesshomaru stumbled falling onto his knees. The invisible ropes holding him seared his flesh.

“You still need convincing,” Toga put his hand over the moon on Sesshomaru’s forehead. The scenery changed. This time to a lone hut in the middle of the village. Sesshomaru knew the smells of this village. Rin walked through the snow dressed in a brown plain kimono with thick tattered boots on her feet. In the past he had provided her with warm boots. As she trudged the villagers sneered at her. A bundle was tied to her front in wools. She kissed the silver hair and although she didn’t answer the comments from the villagers, a sadness tinted her eyes, and the glint he enjoyed seeing in them was gone. “What is this?” His chest was contracting. It felt tight and tense, a touch sad. He struggled against his bonds trying to free himself. They held him cemented to the same position. The sorrow came on like nausea and Sesshomaru buckled with its intensity catching himself on his hands. He coughed in discomfort. “What is this?” He couldn’t tell if it was his own sorrow or hers. That’s how the villagers spoke to her?

The light in Toga’s hand began to fade. As it did the landscape shifted. Sesshomaru saw himself sitting in the forest. His eyes were shut lightly. The tender footsteps and gasp of a small child broke the silence of the morning. He saw Rin as a child. The little girl who had attempted yet feebly to care for him. She hid behind a tree. She had been on her way to visit the grave of her dead family. He knew that now, she told him when she was fourteen. She stopped when she saw him weak and injured on the forest floor. Time shifted rapidly. Night came. She trudged on aching feet, covered in bruises, one eye swollen shut. The scent of men lingered on her tiny body. Curious he asked her where the bruises came from.

“Why did you ask about her the bruises on her face? You claim you didn’t care,” Toga wondered while he flicked his silver hair from his shoulder. “Then you brought her back to life. It wasn’t very practical to carry a child with you. She was kidnapped five times and died twice. You’re lucky I left the meido stone with your mother.”

Sesshomaru grunted, the pain in his chest was gaining in intensity, like his heart was being pulled from it. As his father spoke the memories swept through his vision. _Concern…_he had felt concern for the creature who tried feebly to care for him. “You left the stone so I would train the meido technique and give it to Inuyasha.” Sesshomaru struggled against his bonds. With the lie, his resolute face creased with pain. The fastenings holding blazed against his skin. His body writhed unmoving in pain.

“Why did you take her with you?” Toga’s voice was harsh. He lifted up Sesshomaru’s chin, “tell me son. Why did you bring her with you?”

The pain fortified, burned and stung. The second Sesshomaru thought of lying, he was set on fire. Thorns dug into his skin. The twine holding him captive constricted against his flesh tearing into it. Or at least that is what it felt like. There were no visible injuries on his body.

“If you don’t answer it will keep getting worse,” Toga lovingly touched Sesshomaru’s arm, “it always hurts a father to see his child in pain.”

It was radiating from his chest, into his stomach, waves of nausea flooding his throat, the familiar bubbling of blood welling.

“Why did you take her with you?” Toga prodded.

His father would win this round. Sesshomaru lowered his eyes as he held himself up on all fours. “She was alone, scared. She had no one. Her own kind turned their backs on her. Starved her, beat her. I couldn’t leave her.” The pain abated to just a burning in his heart, freeing the bubbling in his throat draining like a sieve.

“Still you showed mercy. Not in your nature.”

Sesshomaru nodded, “free me,” he commanded his father.

The light in Toga’s hand slowly began to shine again, “I’m not finished with you yet.” His hand went back to the crescent moon on Sesshomaru’s forehead. He saw the field of daisies. It mocked him with the memories it held. The cherry tree, the first time he showed Rin his true form. She laughed asking for a ride on his back. The impracticality of having two children with him, leaving Rin in the village with Kaede, the heaviness, the toll that took on him knowing it was what was best for Rin. The independence that grew with age. The changes in her body. The walks they shared that he spoke to with no one. The day he took her with him after the village was attacked by thieves and her best friend killed. The gift of the sword after Rin made the choice to learn to fight. The memories were crippling. He missed her. Somehow the yearning filled the void he felt in his heart. The bonds wrapped around his neck cutting off the air and sending shockwaves down his spine into his legs. Sesshomaru refused to admit the pain. The stoic expression was replaced with the creases. Lines furrowed his brow, breaking his concentration. He gave into the nausea of years of memories. She was sixteen, she slayed an ogre, she went to bathe with Kohaku, the jealousy ripped through him in a tangible way, “why would the great Sesshomaru be jealous of a human?” His father circled him. “It would have been natural for her to lay with that boy that night and perhaps become his wife. Instead you interrupted their moment. Their _private_ moment and inserted yourself in it. Look at the fire in your eyes, did you mean to hold her like that, bruise her arms with your roughness and then force your own fire on her?”

The image flashed into his brain. He held her by the lake. He pulled her body to his. He pressed his lips against hers. She fought back at first until she gave into the desperation of his kiss. He had touched her intimately that night. Rougher than he should have. Sesshomaru gritted his teeth, “this is private,” he growled at his father. His body trembled in agony. The fire racked his body, forcing his face into the dirt. Sesshomaru was snarling. He wanted to grab his father by his smug face and slash it with his claws. His bonds were forcing him to bow to his father, to accept Inu no Taisho’s superiority.

“The pain will intensify until you speak the truth,” his father stalked around him. His own faced concerned by the agony his son was in. “Speak, son.” He knelt down on knee by Sesshomaru’s face. He lifted the stubborn chin up, “speak. Don’t make me watch you suffer.”

Sesshomaru closed his eyes. They opened red and angry. He attempted to summon his Yoki to transform. The pain intensified and through the bonds holding his arms and legs he felt his life force being sucked from him. He landed stomach down on the red ground panting. His muscle were tense and tired as if they had been battling for months.

“Speak,” his father continued to circle him, making the nausea worse.

“I…didn’t want someone else to be the first to taste her innocence,” it was only then that Sesshomaru saw that in the grass next to the river the sword first began to pulse with life as his fingers found their way to her heated center. That intimate touch had awoken the sword because he saw her as a potential mate, a partner, no longer a child.

“And once you realized she activated your primal need to bare children, you left her confused…why?”

By now, he got the point. Even the yoki of the great Sesshomaru couldn’t fight the bonds of the ancient Bukoseno, “I wouldn’t father a hanyou. She was still just a child. Young and innocent.”

“Is that all Sesshomaru?” Toga sneered. “Why do I sense you are trying to preserve your pride? Is there much of it left down there in the dirt?”

Sesshomaru roared in attempt to force himself off the ground only to be flattened and his bonds to flare. He wheezed, catching his breath. _Damn Bukoseno,_ he was stronger than Magatsuhi, stronger than Moryomaru. The only two that had ever really challenged him. “I was embarrassed to have pawed her like that. She deserved better. I knew what it meant, each time her heart skipped a beat in my arms, the smell that emanated from her body. I wasn’t ready to let her go and allow someone else to have her.”

“You’re finally getting it,” Toga touched his son’s forehead, “the journey will be over soon. When it is, your heart will be free.”

“Why are you doing this father?” Sesshomaru hung his head. His eyes were subdued, defeated, “no more…no more memories.”

“Soon,” His father responded and stroked the bangs from his eyes, “here…” they were back by the lake where he had held her in his arms, to lower the fever he gave her healing her stomach. “She made it clear that she wanted to take her leave from you. You made it clear you would not give her what she craved from you. You would deny her emotions, but once she finally left, and the sword activated you followed her. You created that unique bond of being able to track her through the sword. Feel her emotions, I’m sure it seemed like a good idea at the time. Many things do when you are desperate. But this is what I don’t understand, is when you kiss her, you take her back to that field of daisies we have seen so many times, and you finally to my pride succumb to your emotions.”

Sesshomaru saw it, holding her in the hot springs. The way he kept pushing her towards intimacy to douse his own fire within her. Had she really wanted him? Or did he push her? He saw the way he kept teasing her body. How scared she truly was on his lap under the cherry tree. The way her hands trembled against his, her head shook and the tears of indecision fell from her eyes. She was still young and his body would soon take her innocence. When his eyes changed, his horror increased. Her mouth tightened. Her hands dug into his back as he beat his hips into hers. What had felt like heaven to him, looked like survival for her. Sesshomaru’s gaze was drawn to a light in in his stomach, it bled into Rin’s belly and flashed so ethereal it almost blinded him. “You bonded her in that moment. You didn’t even know then, that is when you placed the child inside her body. Did you know that great Dai-Yokai control when they procreate? If you don’t infuse it with your yoki, it dies before reaching its target. How do you think in 1500 years of life, I only fathered two sons? Did you love her then Sesshomaru?”

“Yes,” he answered quietly, vanquished, giving in to the bonds that were loosening with each truthful answer, feeding the absorbed yoki back into his body. “It felt natural…all too natural to be with her in that way. To hold her to me. To let her sleep in my arms. Why didn’t she tell me I was hurting her?”

“You wouldn’t have listened in that feral state,” Toga smiled. “I see you are finally getting it.”

“I asked her. I asked afterwards, she just wanted to please me.”

Toga nodded, “her need to please you superseded her own needs.”

“One more,” this time Toga placed both hands on either sides of his son’s face and rested his own crescent moon on top of his son’s. “Her birth.” Rin was on all fours crying. Her screams filled the cavern echoing off the walls. Inuyasha fought in human form using Rin’s katana. In the depths of horrendous affliction, together they took down Touma’s henchman. Then the small infant came from between Rin’s legs, ripping her center, crippling her. When she finally left Rin’s body, Rin struggled to stand at the sounds of Inuyasha trying to revive Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru saw the memories from her eyes. His heart echoed the emotions that ripped through her that day. The deep pain. The affliction of her heart, the desperate loneliness to share her daughter with the father that helped create her.

“Stop,” Sesshomaru commanded. His father’s eyes were only inches from his own, “please, Chichiue stop.”

“Do you still love her? Do you understand what she went through to give you the child you named Yuki?”

“That is why I can’t be with her. The pain crippled me. It cost me my life.”

“Why did you let the bond go when Inuyasha revived you?”

“Bukoseno said he lacked the yoki necessary to bring me back whole.”

“He said Inuyasha lacked the strength, **you** didn’t.” Toga’s eyes softened.

“What?”

“You could have fought for the bond. Why did you let it go?”

Sesshomaru’s eyes pitched red again. The fires of hell engulfed him in mind searing pain and agony near breaking his bones and flaying his body.

“Don’t fight it son. Speak the truth.”

“Fear,” he truly was subjugated. Sesshomaru’s fell to his knees once again, “I was afraid. My love for Rin, it made me weak like you. It caused my death.”

“Vulnerable,” his father corrected. “The same way it made me vulnerable when Inuyasha was born and I died, leaving behind a child who would never know me, and a son who would seek his life until he understood why I did what I did. Sesshomaru you have always been proud and stubborn. Your power is immense but what gives you your real strength is the size of your heart. The one who gave you that heart,” Toga’s hand rested over Sesshomaru’s heart. His touch soothed the pain in Sesshomaru’s chest. “Rin is your heart. It will only grow warmer and lighter, with each new life you bring into this world. I wish I would have been there to explain the purpose of the swords to you. I would have liked to see the man you are now. You are better for your love for the woman. You are greater for it.”

“But I can’t protect her. Not all the time. She is strong. So strong. She can fight on her own. It’s what I love about her. I can’t keep her safe. My power is not enough.”

“Then do as I did,” his father patted Sesshomaru’s cheek, “make a home for yourself.”

“I have no connection to the Western Lands.”

“Make a home where you can love, and love deeply. I didn’t take up my father’s lands. I made my own borders, so now must you. You don’t need a sword to keep track of her. You just need your great love.” Toga began to fade, but before he did, he put his hand holding the bright orb of light out to Sesshomaru. “Sesshomaru, help Taisho find his Yoki. I’m so proud of you son,” the words came like whisper across a silent morning. His father was gone.

Finally, being free of his bonds, Sesshomaru took the light in his left hand. It was warm. It’s scent was that of Rin, that of ardor, the spring dew, the memories they shared. The light sunk into his hand, travelled up his arm, soothing the pain from the bonds that held him. It absorbed into his chest, filling the cavity that had been strangely empty after he was brought back to bursting.

When Sesshomaru came to, he was on his knees in front of Bukoseno panting, and exhausted. He rubbed his eyes, unable to believe that he was back in front of the tree. The carved face looked back on him kindly. Bukoseno removed his limbs from Sesshomaru’s body. As the larger branch slithered out of his chest, Sesshomaru’s skin closed.

“What was that?” Sesshomaru’s breath was ragged.

“The last vestiges of your father’s soul. He asked me to save it for when you finally gave in to love and faced your own mortality.”

Sesshomaru pulled himself up and straightened his haori. He knew what he needed to do, but his first instinct was to touch his heart. The bond was back and it was ragged in tenderness. He had to use the bough of Bukoseno to steady himself. “How I yearn for her.”

“You’ve been in my boughs for two months now Sesshomaru. I believe it’s time for you to return to your Rin and your daughter. Your enemies are circling. They will attack within a month. Make what preparations you need, but your leaving must be swift. They hunger for the life of your daughter and your lover.”

Sesshomaru ran from the forest, towards the open clearing, he knew what he needed to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment or Kudo.


	9. Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru returns after being gone for three months. Will Rin forgive him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh and I posted a new story poking fun at fandom norms :) It's funny read it.

Three months had passed. Winter was fast upon the village. The air was crisp and chilled, keeping Rin indoors with the baby. The ground was covered in an easy foot of snow. Most of it was untouched. In the winter most of the village slept indoors. People stayed huddled around their fires for warmth. They only ventured out for water and to hunt.

Yuki was growing. She was getting pudgier around the face and legs. The stripes on her stomach had faded from a violet to lavender and her eyes were changing from blue to gold. With each passing week, Rin’s heart broke into more pieces. The first few weeks she was able to make up excuses as to why he did not come. Something happened. He was fighting someone. Something was keeping him. After the first month passed she begged Jaken to take Aun and go in search of Sesshomaru. Jaken refused, not knowing where to look. Into the second month Rin spent the days trying to put on a brave face for Kaede who visited her daily. She smiled for Kagome and Sango when they brought their children by. Kagome’s children were most excited, especially Izayoi and Sota to have a cousin who had a moon on their forehead like their own and the same silver colored hair.

Izayoi was desperate to show her uncle that she had mastered the whip just like him. Taisho sat quietly in the corner when Sota and Izayoi showed their tricks as he was unable to produce even the slightest hint that he had Yokai blood running through his veins. Rin forced herself to laugh as she tried to engage them. They called her aunt now, because they knew that Sesshomaru was Yuki’s father. Sango was pregnant again with her fifth child, and during this time Kohaku had married a girl from another village. They shared an awkward conversation and agreed that Rin’s heart since she was a child had always been with Sesshomaru-sama, and he had just hoped that he stood a chance before understanding that Sesshomaru-sama would never allow anyone to have Rin. “Possessive to the end?” Kohaku chuckled, “I thought he was going to kill me that night.”

“He probably would have if we had gone any farther,” Rin agreed.

* * *

When her friends left Rin held Yuki tightly. The very look of Yuki reminded Rin of what she was missing. She tucked Yuki into the bed of furs on the wooden floor for warmth and Rin wrapped herself in her warmest Kimono. She trudged out to the porch. Most evenings she watched from her narrow porch to see if he would come. Miroku and Inuyasha fashioned her a wooden rocking chair to sit on when the weather changed. She bundled herself in blankets and layers when Yuki actually slept waiting and hoping. She dreamt about him in her sleep and woke up with tears in her eyes when she woke alone. Jaken was always nearby but his words were of no comfort. Rin was devastated. Sesshomaru broke his promise to never leave her for so long again. She didn’t even know why he left in the first place. That far off look haunted her. The way his body went rigid when she hugged him and then he strode out of the cave and disappeared without a single word, other than to name their child.

She missed the connection through the sword. He took it, but why? To ensure she couldn’t find him? By then Rin decided she would not wait for him to come. Although she lived on the outskirts near Inuyasha’s family and Jinenji and she found close friends in Sango and Kagome since she had experienced childbirth, she felt alone. She told Jaken that as soon as the snow began to melt they were leaving. When he asked where, she said she didn’t care. She just wanted to go somewhere she didn’t hear whispers about her being impure and giving birth to something with tainted blood. The villagers eyes were constantly on her. They accused her of birthing a bastard child and being the whore of the demon lord who once doted on her as a child. She should have expected it, but at the time when she was with him, she never thought that he would leave again or that she would raise their child alone. He was so content, happy with her, and then it was gone. And then there was the coming storm.

Rin had heard rumors of Yokai gathering in the forests. Inuyasha said they were sure to attack soon. The yokai were gathering preparing to attack. Inuyasha and Miroku urged Rin to stay back. _You can fight when Yuki is older. Stay hidden until then. _Rin had not trained since Yuki was born. Her stomach was less toned. If push came to it, she could defend herself but she lacked that which had been her power for a year.

“He isn’t coming Jaken,” she told him one morning, “in a few more weeks, the snow will begin to melt and we will take our leave.”

Jaken shook his head, “I don’t like this. We should wait for Sesshomaru-sama.”

“He isn’t coming. If he was, he would have already.” Rin held Yuki in a bundle of furs, close to her chest. She was alert more these days and slept less at night. It was as if nothing comforted the baby. Jaken and Rin took turns with Yuki bouncing and singing with her.

They were sitting on the porch. “We’ll go when the fighting starts. Inuyasha should keep them busy enough.”

“They are coming for Yuki,” Jaken responded coolly. He didn’t like having to live in a human village but he didn’t know how to find Sesshomaru-sama and wasn’t about to wonder all over the country side looking for him.

“They won’t get a chance to get her. Besides, I don’t think it would hurt him.”

“What are you talking about?” Jaken was incredulous and not following her line of speech.

“If he cared, he would have come back! He would have stayed with us!” _No! I am not going to cry again, _“he probably just figured out that he fathered a disgusting hanyou with a lowly human and went somewhere else.” Rin wiped a tear from her eyes. She wasn’t sure if that was true, but what she was sure of, is that she would not let harm come to her child. Yuki was perfect. “It’s getting late Jaken. We should go inside. Will you light the fire?”

“We need more firewood,” Jaken looked at the dwindling pile, “there is only enough left for tonight.”

“So, go get more.” Rin bellowed at him annoyed.

“It’s cold outside!” Jaken protested.

“Since when does a yokai care about temperature?” Rin threw Nintojo at him, “besides I want to be alone for a while.”

Jaken grumbled as he went down the steps and wade through the snow towards Aun.

_He forgot to make the fire. _Rin shook her head and placed Yuki in her bed. She covered her with furs to keep her warm. She went back to the wood pile outside. She heard something rumbling. Her eyes went to the sky, and the trees. _They aren’t waiting for the snow to melt. They are starting now. _The aura was overpowering. It made her skin crawl. Goosebumps puckered her skin. There had to be a hundreds of them. They flew like wasps from the trees into the sky. They ran from the forest breaking the branches. Rin ran back into the house. She grabbed her snake-yokai knife and picked up Yuki. She pulled the front of her kimono open, strapping Yuki against her bare skin with a red sash. She fled to the hatch near the entrance of the hut that led to a small basement. Below she had the green powder Jinenji made. She put a soft cloth over Yuki’s face sure that it would affect her as much as it had her father and all the Yokai they had tested it on. She spread it along the edges of the tiny basement. She clung to her tiny daughter unable to stand because of the low beams. As a child she could easily stand upright in the dank cellars. She knelt down near the front where the wood was spread slightly. Through a small crack she saw them blackening the white snow. They were coming. She closed her eyes bracing herself for the impact. They were coming straight for her home.

There were twenty tall ogres, snakes, one-eyes, and every kind of foul thing flying towards her home. Rin’s stomach cramped in anticipation. _They know which hut is mine_? She flexed her fingers along the dagger, wishing for her katana. The power it held would have evened the playing field somewhat. If she didn’t have to worry about the child tied to her front. Her lips trembled as the ogres came for her home. A green one stood tall on long legs, with a mallet in its hand. It bellowed a battle cry raising the black mallet. Rin shushed Yuki’s whimpering. If she didn’t move or someone didn’t come that mallet was going to crush her home.

“Yah!!” Jaken shrieked as he leapt from Aun’s back. “Nintojo!” He screamed blasting the stupid green ogre with bright orange flames. The male head of the staff opened its mouth burning the green hand to a crisp. Aun opened their mouths wide, sending a blast of electrified light at a blue ogre and two snake demons.

Rin held her chest panting, trying to quiet her heart. She may have staunched their scent with the powder but if she wasn’t careful they would hear her heart beating out of her chest.

The horde swelled into a mass, sharpening to the point of an arrow, flying at the hut. Jaken flinched. He kept the male mouth open, flames billowing high. Aun sent another blast of power only singing the tip of the arrow coming at them. “Meido Zangetsha!”

Rin exhaled so loudly she was sure someone would have heard her. Inuyasha’s golden eyes flashed back at her raising an eyebrow for warning. The swarm was cut in half by the black meido blades sucking them in. He flew into the air sending black blade after black blade at the approaching ogres.

Rin smiled in surprise when she saw Shippo. He was taller now and met her waist instead of being as tiny as he was before. He sprinted across the snow to the swell of demons that were raising into the tree attempting to form an arrow again and yelled, “fox fire!” The acid green smoke enveloped the horde of demons igniting their flesh. He smirked in satisfaction at his work, then found new targets.

Miroku jumped and slid into the snow next to Inuyasha. He pulled sutras from his wrists, aiming them at the remaining ogres. Kagome ran to Rin’s front stoop. She nocked arrow after arrow, aiming them for the trees and at the ogres purifying them on target. Rin smiled, having such good friends meant the world to her. It was hard not to shout praise to her friends but silence was imperative. Yuki squirmed against her torso uncomfortably, squealing in defiance. Rin latched Yuki to her breast to ensure her silence. She knew they couldn’t smell her.

Suddenly a white light came from the sky. It turned into an orb of light meters from her home. Until she saw the green light flashing through the hoard of Yokai and the call of, “Bakusaiga,” she didn’t allow herself to believe that he had finally come. Jaken the little urchin that he was ran excitedly to Sesshomaru. But the rest looked on in shock. It only took one strike to turn back the horde of yokai and destroy them. Sesshomaru stood staring fiercely at the trees, his eyes were hard, and angry. When he turned towards Inuyasha and Kagome, his hair blew gently in the winter wind. It was like a silver waterfall. Behind him the bodies of dead yokai fell like rain.

“Where is Rin?” He demanded. _He can’t smell me either._

Rin looked at his eyes. They looked downcast and full of despair. She saw her katana tied to his obi and ground her teeth in anger. If she had the sword, she would have been more useful in battle. She stormed out of the cellar, fully intent on giving him a piece of her mind and then some.

Mounds of dead flesh from Yokai dripped from the sky while Kagome cautiously walked through the snow to his side. “Forgive me, O-ni-sama…I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to see Rin right away.”

Rin stopped on the porch of her home. For a moment she couldn’t bring her feet to carry her farther. He strode proudly to her. She held tight to Yuki who was still wrapped inside her kimono. Yuki was quiet and sucking contently attached to Rin, with one little hand running along her the supple skin. Rin could not speak. Her body shook in fury and shock. All she could do was glare at him, standing there arrogantly, with his head above everyone else.

“Move,” Sesshomaru gently pushed Kagome out of the way and stalked towards Rin. He was like a wolf on the prowl.

Rin followed his motions, walking down the stairs of her hut. As soon as she was in striking distance, she raised her hand in wrath and attempted to lay a blow against his cheek. He caught her hand nimbly. His grip was firm but gentle. Miroku, Inuyasha, Kagome and Shippo cowered in fear with their mouths open. They hadn’t known anyone to openly defy the Dai-yokai the way Rin was.

Sesshomaru’s eyes went from tired to raging. Rin aimed for him with her other hand only to have him catch that one as well. Both her hands were pinned to her sides. She stood on her tippy toes trying to get out of his grip. Yuki let out an awkward squeal from inside Rin’s kimono. The noise sung in his ears. His breath nearly stopped. He restrained Rin’s wrists in one hand. Sesshomaru’s eyes softened as he pulled Rin’s kimono open just enough to see the tiny face of his child. Her hair was longer than the last time he saw her but still as white as the snow she was born in. He dipped his nose down to her face, inhaling deeply. Yuki smelled more like her mother. The stripes on her cheeks were more vibrant. Rin’s scent had changed as well. He could no longer smell himself on her skin. Her scent was cold. He raised his head. He blinked trying to catch her eyes. Her eyes avoided his.

Rin ripped her hands out of Sesshomaru’s and attempted to walk away before he grabbed her by the elbow, “Rin.”

Rin violently pulled her elbow from his grasp and continued stomping back to her hut, fully intent on ignoring him.

He tried again to stop Rin. She whirled on him, knife in hand attempting to slash his throat. She was out of practice but still had the same speed and grace. He bent his neck back enough to miss the blade. Sesshomaru became aware of the eyes watching him and cursed under his breath. He grabbed her around the waist and flew straight up into the sky against her great protests.

“What good is that going to do?” Shippo asked as he watched Sesshomaru hover in the sky with Rin.

“So, he can at least feel like we don’t see Rin trying to pummel him,” Inuyasha laughed, “well, let’s go make sure he got all of them Miroku. Shippo, Kagome go home and tell Sango, Kaede and the children that everything is fine now.”

“Izayoi, will be so excited O-ni-sama is here!” Kagome looked up, “but Rin doesn’t look very happy. I can hardly see them but she seems to be struggling a lot.”

“Stop calling him that already!” Inuyasha barked throwing Tetsusaiga over his shoulder as he hiked to the forest. 

* * *

“Let go of me,” Rin yelled at Sesshomaru. She tried wriggling free only to look down and see how high up they were. He held her around the waist her back against his chest. She tried scratching his arm. She stopped knowing it was pointless. His skin wouldn’t budge. “I don’t want to hear whatever it is you have to say! Just let us go!” She attempted to reach for her knife again, but he caught her hand, making it clear he would not allow her to strike him.

Sesshomaru was breathing heavily, trying to control his anger. He had given her permission to drop the formal title but never had he given her permission to strike him in anger or defy him so publicly. His pride was on the line. He bent his neck inhaling her scent. Not a warm feeling wafted into his nostrils, just anger. He had hoped she would feel the same desire towards him that he had for her, perhaps comfort, or warmth. She struggled against him. Yuki was screaming now. The baby’s fear drifted into his nose and straight to his heart.

“I hate you,” Rin tried elbowing his stomach and cursed when all that happened was her own elbow aching, “I hate you!” She attempted to ram the back of her head into his nose only hitting air as he moved his head out of the way.

His stomach pitched. He could not find the words that he wanted to say. They were stuck in his throat, and her words, they were cold and full of despair. They were cutting him.

“You really thought you could disappear for three months? Without telling me? Without letting me know? Taking the only thing I had that connected me to you and then come back and think I would be happy to see you? I hate you! I hate you so much! We’re better off without you! We don’t need you! Now put us back down on the ground.” Rin looked at Yuki’s face. It was red as a strawberry. She was shrieking at the top of her lungs.

Sesshomaru’s eyes were burning, her words were cutting him to the core. “I want to show you something.” He finally spoke.

“I’m not interested,” Rin used her free hands to try to get Yuki to nurse again, “it’s too cold for Yuki to be outside. You would know that if you had bothered to be around.”

“I’m not asking. I will keep her warm enough. Stop squirming,” Sesshomaru adjusted his grip on Rin and flew. He held her back against his chest, with one hand supporting the bundle against her breast. His speed made Rin want to vomit. She held onto his wrists and closed her eyes trying to fight the spinning in her head. After a moment, she cautiously opened her eyes and traced the scenery as it quickly changed from the forest she was used to, to the familiar valley, where the daisies she had enjoyed so much as a child were.

Sesshomaru landed lightly and released Rin. Rin took a moment to catch her footing and for the world to stop spinning. She took a moment to make sure he knew how angry she was and tried to kick his shins. He lifted one leg blocking her. _Bastard, why does he always have to be faster than me._

“So what?” Rin spun around arms outstretched to the sides. She knew where they were. The ground was covered in snow like every other part of Japan then. The daisies were nowhere to be seen. Steam rose from the hot spring and next to it, like a foggy memory was the cherry tree where Sesshomaru had first made love to Rin. She blushed recalling what it felt like the first time she found him inside of her. Rin had been so nervous too, when she understood that Sesshomaru intended to be intimate with her. Neither of them knew in that moment that Yuki would be the product of their embrace. Rin adjusted Yuki who was still sobbing hysterically against her. When she looked up, she saw his eyes on the baby. Rin’s heart slackened only slightly._ He is her father_. “Do you want to hold her? You said you would keep her warm. She’s crying because it’s cold.”

Sesshomaru nodded, heart in his throat. Rin took Yuki from inside her Kimono. The small infant began to scream even more when the cold air touched her face. Sesshomaru’s lungs tightened as the bundle came into his arms. She was still a light burden in his hands, warm soft, and **his**. As he had done when she was born, he pulled forward the part of his mokomoko that wrapped around his shoulder and tucked Yuki inside. He tightened it enough to keep her in. Her cheeks were fuller, and if possible her skin paler. Her scent had changed but only slightly. As soon as she was against his fur, he watched in surprise as her eyes lazily began to close. She quickly drifted off to sleep. He traced her little moon and touched her soft white hair. He touched one of his daughter’s little hands, gently stroking her fingers. She had tiny claws already. Curiously he turned her hand over and smiled, “one day dokkasu will come from these hands.”

Rin’s anger was slowly fading, watching him with Yuki warmed her heart. This was what she wanted. She had wanted to share these special moments with Sesshomaru. Yuki was so peaceful in his arms unlike in Rin’s. Maybe the baby missed her father and that is why she did not sleep well at night. Exasperated Rin blurted out, “why did you bring me here? Why did you even bother…”

He placed a timid finger over her lips, “silence.” He had not moved away from her. Their shoulders were nearly touching. His voice was soft but commanding and if Rin didn’t know any better, broken. “I won’t hear anymore words. Rin,” he took a deep breath, “will you allow me to explain?”

“Should I? You left without a word after I watched you die. I saw your breath stop. Your body went cold…my heart is broken Sesshomaru.” The tears finally came. Rin’s throat felt tight. She covered her eyes with the palms of her hands.

Sesshomaru tried to reach out to comfort her, but she slapped his hands away and folded her arms around her sides. “NO,” she told him, “you don’t get to touch me anymore.” 

If possible those golden eyes of his darkened even more. He went on one knee in front of Rin, “please Rin, let me explain.”

She took deep breaths trying to get control of herself, “explain but don’t expect me to welcome you back into my life,” she wiped tears from her eyes. When he reached his hands out to hold hers again she swatted them away.

“Rin, damn it,” he stood and turned around so he wouldn’t have to look into those eyes that were full of hurt and so she wouldn’t see his own sorrow either. He pursed his lips. The words had to come. Whether he wanted them to or not, “I left because something felt wrong, other, like you were no longer a part of me. I saw our daughter. I held her. I cradled her. I felt pride in her but when you embraced me it felt wrong, like something in me was missing. The feeling was so powerful. I couldn’t stay. I needed answers and,” he bit his lower lip, “I was angry with you. The sword fed the pains of your labor into me. It crippled me during battle. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t breathe. All I could think of was that you were alone and in pain, and in that moment of weakness Touma was able to take my neck.” He stopped and gripped the hilt of Bakusaiga to steady himself, “I died. I tasted my own mortality,” he stroked the puffy cheeks of his daughter again, “my daughter,” he whispered quietly, “I went to Totosai with the sword. When he didn’t have any answers, I went to Bukoseno. He showed me an image of my father. Chichiue explained to me, that I was afraid because loving you, creating life with you, left me vulnerable. I never thought that taking you to my bed the way that I did, would create a child so soon. That the moment, under this cherry tree,” he steadied himself on the trunk of their sakura tree, “I became one with you and our essence combined creating Yuki,” his voice was mournful, “I needed time to understand what I did. Why I did it and to break the connection,” he took her Katana from his obi and returned it.

Rin took it quietly, taking in what he was saying. When she grasped the hilt, she looked at Sesshomaru dismayed, “I can’t feel you.”

He shook his head, “the connection was a crutch, because I didn’t trust you. I didn’t trust me. You spent years telling me you would leave the village without my consent. I didn’t want to lose track of you. I reveled in that control over you, but it wasn’t right, for either of us, to be so connected.”

“I don’t understand you Sesshomaru,” Rin hung her head, shivering. “Why couldn’t you just tell me what was in your heart and let me help you? It’s like you hated me. Is that what this is about? You hate that you went to bed with a human and fathered a hanyou?”

“Let me finish, do you not understand how hard this is for me? To admit that I was so scared? Rin I fear nothing but the intensity of my bond to you.” He stopped to think over his words and then he hung his head in shame, “I was so afraid of all the emotions, that I spent hundreds of years attempting to stifle, that you managed to pull out of me in ten. In fear, our bond was left between this world and the next. When I woke, I was without it. We were no longer what we had been. Chichiue returned it to me,” he touched his heart, fingering the skin beneath his black armor, “when he did, I was compelled to return to you. I don’t see a hanyou when I look at our daughter. She is beautiful like her mother.” He raised a hand in the air, and suddenly the area changed.

Rin’s eyes widened, they were standing it what looked like a nursery, with a small crib for a baby. Toys sat off to the side next to a chest for clothes and open doors that led to stone flooring. “What is this?” Rin’s gasped stepping backwards in disbelief.

“Father hated and loved battles. When I was born, he established a territory in the West for himself. The territory he protected set a limit against Yokai invaders, and gave his children, gave me, a safe place to grow up until I could fight myself. It would have done the same for Inuyasha if father hadn’t died the day he was born. Many have believed that I would return to the Western Lands and take over where my father left off. I have no connection to those lands. Those I love are here. I no longer need to seek powerful enemies to fight. What I need now is to know that the ones I love are protected. I will follow in my father’s footsteps and establish a territory. It starts here, in this place where you and I have shared,” he turned around to look at Rin, “where I gave you my heart,” he neared her cautiously. “Where Yuki’s life force was conceived.” He dared to take a step towards Rin, she allowed him to cup her chin in his hand, “forgive me, please Rin. I…” He took a deep breath, “love you, so deeply.”

Rin was lost for words. She trembled in the cold. Rin’s tears flowed freely off her cheeks, down her neck and froze ice against her skin. She still smelled of wrath.

“It’s not finished yet, but this will be our home. I had the builders start with the nursery. Through that door,” he pointed to a plain wooden door, “they will make our room and then add more bedrooms if there are more children. The bedroom will lead to a large foyer and the hot springs, the cherry tree, as well as the field of daisies which will be our private garden. You will have servants and a guard stronger than Jaken. I will establish the boundaries of my territory to include Kaede’s village and as much territory as needed so that my enemies know where they are not to enter. It won’t mean that you will escape harm completely but it will make it harder for those that would hurt you, and our daughter. Rin, Rin please, look at me?” He tugged her chin back up, flicking a tear off with his thumb.

She wiped her eyes and stared into his eyes. Their mouths were so close Rin could feel his hot breath against her lips.

“Come live with me here. It will take a year or two for our home to be finished completely. When the snow begins to melt, they will finish our room, a small private dining area, and sitting room, it will be small but the cottage will be ours.” He held her hand against his heart, “forgive me.”

Rin was shaking not just from the cold but also from what Sesshomaru had said. Her feet felt numb as she hadn’t had a chance to put her winter boots on. She couldn’t stop the tears flowing from her eyes. “Please, just take me back.”

Disappointment painted his face. “If that is your wish.” He walked towards her and wrapped his arms around her waist. This time he held her to his side so he could feel her neck against his cheek. “You’re freezing,” he gazed into her eyes trying to find the slightest bit of hope that she would forgive him. _I don’t understand her pain…but I understand abandoning her caused it. She does not face the burden of our bond, but her heart is broken as if she did. _Sesshomaru paused before taking off, wanting one more moment to hold her. She trembled in his arms, trying to hide her face, her red eyes and sorrow. He flew into the air, but this time he did not go as quickly as he had before. He was desperate for her warmth and like this, she had no choice but to allow him to embrace her. He purposely grew the second tail and wrapped it around Rin to stop her shivering. He used the time to just feel her body against his.

When he landed on the porch of her house, he gently took out Yuki who was still sleeping and handed her to Rin. The inside of the hut smelled like cooking meat. The smell disgusted Sesshomaru. He looked on disappointed as Rin walked into the hut not giving him a second glance. He could smell Jaken inside and heard him ask, “where is Sesshomaru-sama?”

Rin stopped just inside expecting Sesshomaru to follow her and when he didn’t, she went back out and saw him walking away. His hands were clenched by his sides. “Sesshomaru!” She called.

He turned to look at her. His mouth was taught. Rin could see the smoldering in his eyes jaded by the sorrow that belied his heart. When he turned back to gaze at Rin he took in her figure. She was slightly plumper than she had been before Yuki was born. Her hips were wider. He knew his eyes hungered for her, but more than anything, he yearned for the closeness of their souls.

_Why must he look at me like that? _“You haven’t seen Yuki in months. Stay the night?”

He nodded heavily and trudged back to the house coming inside. Rin had made the small hut like a home. There was a firepit in the middle. Rin’s pallet was laid out at the back of the hut. Towards the front was a smaller bed of furs, for Jaken. Rin had a small closet where she kept her shoes and kimonos. Jaken had a chair where Nintojo rested by the wall. Folded against one of the walls, was a screen to separate the rooms. Sesshomaru heard the baby fussing. Rin walked over and grabbed the folding screen putting it up. The hut was dimly lit, most of the light coming from the firepit.

Sesshomaru sat down against one of the side walls. He watched as Jaken poured the stew for himself and for Rin. Jaken went down a hatch in the middle of the floor and came back with something for Sesshomaru. “For you Sesshomaru-sama. I saved it, should you return. You favorite demon hide.”

Sesshomaru glanced over through a crack between the wall and the folding screen. Rin’s hair was pulled over one of her shoulders. The right side of her kimono was completely off baring her shoulders and naked waist. He stared, longing to be close to the warmth of her skin. He could hear the soft suckling of his daughter and Rin singing. She rocked from side to side soothing the baby. She had not given him an answer and he could not fault her for her anger or her sorrow. Rin had just had the baby when he last saw her, she was exhausted and…

“Rin,” he called to her.

“What?” She called back without turning her head. Her muscles were less defined on her back than before. A small swell of breast could be seen.

“Your wounds have healed?” He knew nothing of human births, but he had seen the damage himself when Kagome checked her. He had felt it in his own body as she birthed their daughter during the battle.

“Yes, a while ago,” she could feel his eyes on her. It was easier to nurse to simply pull down the kimono which is why she put up the screen. _Should have known that wouldn’t stop him from looking._

“Good,” he answered more to himself. It was not in his nature to care for her as he had when her back was injured, but it felt important that he missed those first moments by her side when she was weakened from childbirth. “Did he hurt you?”

“Who?” Rin rolled her left shoulder as she switched the baby to her other breast and grunted, there were days her back still hurt from that damn bear demon throwing her against the wall. The left shoulder was always the worst when it did.

“Touma. Did he hurt you?” He laced his fingers over an upraised knee.

“He tried,” Rin tried to steady her voice, “the sword protected me.”

He said nothing in reply.

The baby fell asleep on Rin’s breast. She gently took her off and wrapped her in the furs. She fixed her kimono in time to confirm what she thought, that Sesshomaru had been watching her. She came out from behind the screen and sat next to the fire pit with Jaken on one side and Sesshomaru on the other. She took the bowl of stew Jaken left for her and ate quietly. She could not look at Sesshomaru. The tension in the air was unmistakable. Jaken did not speak at all except to ask to be freed from his assignment of living in a human village and return to Sesshomaru’s side. Sesshomaru refused to answer. His eyes were a million miles away again as he slowly nibbled at the demon hide Jaken gave him.

After she finished, she told Jaken she wanted to sleep as the baby was sleeping and the sun would be setting all the way soon. It was awkward, trying to sleep knowing that he was on the other side of the screen. Isn’t this what she wanted? Was for him to return? Rin was no longer sure what she wanted beyond sleep. She rose from her place by the fire, gave Jaken the dirty the bowl to wash and laid down behind the screen with Yuki nearby.

A gust of wind came through the front door as Izayoi came running inside. Rin heard Inuyasha from outside yelling at her to come back out.

“O-jisama!” Izayoi ran to Sesshomaru. She was four now. Her white hair flowed down to the middle of her back. Unlike her brother Sota’s golden eyes and Taisho’s brown eyes, hers were lavender. She wore a bright pink Kimono with a blue obi tied like a butterfly behind her and a thick brown long coat on top of that. She Ran into Sesshomaru’s arms. He clearly looked confused. His arms remained stiff at his sides. “O-jisama, look what I can do!” She flung her hand up in the air. A green spark came from her claws. She frowned at it, then tried again, producing a tiny whip only a few inches long.

Sesshomaru found himself resisting the urge to grin. The child with white hair and a moon similar to his had melted the icy feeling in the hut and filled it with warmth. He peeled Izayoi off his lap as Inuyasha came in. “Izayoi I told you not to run off.”

“But it’s fine! O-jisama is here now and his Bakusaiga is more powerful than Tetsusaiga anyway. Did you see how many Yokai he killed?” She tried to climb back into Sesshomaru’s unsuspecting lap. “You can’t do that. It’s because he’s a pure Yokai.”

Inuyasha’s mouth hit the floor. “You might as well let her,” he motioned at Sesshomaru’s lap, “she won’t give up until you do.”

Sesshomaru instead stood up and took the little girl’s hand. “Is that the best you can do?” He asked her.

Rin wanted to slap him, to be so rude to a child.

Izayoi looked confused.

Sesshomaru went down on one knee, “watch.” He flicked his hand. A long whip filled the room, circled around them and then snapped with a loud crack. “Now close your eyes,” he told her. “Focus. Do you feel a warmth in in your hand?”

She nodded, “this one. The left one. It’s the only one where the whip will come out of. The right one always feels cold, and I can’t make it. And-”

Sesshomaru shook her shoulder. “Silence. Now focus on the warmth in your claws. Imagine that you are heating it and then release the heat through your fingers.”

Izayoi closed her eyes tightly and took a deep breath. She scraped her claws against each other, and then flung her hand into the air. A larger whip flew from her claws several feet from her body and slammed into Inuyasha’s cheek. Izayoi looked up appalled that she had hit her father.

Inuyasha wiped a spot of blood from his cheeks.

“She has a good aim,” Sesshomaru sneered.

Rin started laughing from the other side of the screen. Izayoi ran over and jumped on top of Rin. She looked at the baby and gave Yuki her finger, “she’s my cutest cousin.”

“She’s your only cousin,” Rin laughed and tickled Izayoi’s side.

“Did you see my whip Oba-san?” Izayoi asked Rin.

Sesshomaru startled at the sound of Rin being Izayoi’s aunt. He gazed angrily at Inuyasha.

“How else was I supposed to explain your relationship with Rin? If you’re her uncle and Yuki’s father, and Yuki is her cousin that makes Rin her aunt.” Inuyasha folded his arms.

“Sankan tesou!!” Another child came running into Rin’s hut. Rin giggled, looking over her shoulder, Sota now seven came running in with Taisho five close behind him. Blades flew through the air straight at Sesshomaru who deflected them easily. Rin saw the slightest smile cross the great Yokai’s lips.

“They’ve missed their uncle,” Rin commented.

“O-jisama! When are you going to put another baby in Rin’s tummy?” Izayoi asked.

Sesshomaru’s eyes widened for a moment before his face went back to its’ same blank demeanor.

“Izayoi, that’s private,” Rin scolded her.

Kagome came in behind the boys, “I’m sorry, once they heard you were here O-nisama they wanted to show you their tricks. Rin, how is my niece?” Kagome went behind the screen and joined Izayoi, Yuki and Rin. Kagome put something into Rin’s hand and whispered, “just in case.”

Rin looked at it. It was a shell with a sweet-smelling cream inside. “In case of what?”

Kagome leaned over and cupped her hand around Rin’s ear, “in case you forgive him. You’ll need it. Trust me. It won’t be comfortable after having a baby.”

“I have no intention,” Rin grumbled.

“We all say that,” Kagome shouldered Rin softly. “I’ve never seen his eyes so sullen before. I think he actually regrets his actions for once.”

“It’s not the first time he has felt regret,” Rin mumbled. His eyes met hers, _that hearing. _Rin wanted to scream at him to mind his own business.

Taisho stood back in the corner by himself. He walked over to Inuyasha and held his father’s hand. Sesshomaru noted the boy’s dejected look and remembered his father’s request. _Does this weak child really have yoki inside?_ He walked over to the boy. He knelt down in front of him and took Taisho’s hands in his. He carefully looked at the boy’s hands, turned them over and examined his palms, it wasn’t there. Then he took Taisho’s nails one by one and sniffed them curiously. Sesshomaru used his clawed middle finger to dig into the skin, drawing blood on Taisho’s right middle finger.

“Ow,” Taisho tried to move his hand away but Sesshomaru did not release it.

“Oi, what are you doing?” Inuyasha demanded trying to take Taisho’s hands away.

“Shut up,” Sesshomaru shoved Inuyasha off. Sesshomaru massaged the finger until a few drops of blood bubbled at the tip of the finger. He smelled it and then looked at Inuyasha, “there,” Sesshomaru held the ring and middle finger of Taisho’s right hand. “Dokkasu.”

“What?” Inuyasha picked up the hand and smelled the blood, “I don’t smell anything.”

“You wouldn’t know how. I smell father’s blood faintly, but it’s there.” Sesshomaru held tightly to the fingers, “this may hurt. Bare it.” He still had Taisho’s two fingers. Slowly dokkasu came from Sesshomaru’s claws in an almost invisible cloud. It covered Taisho’s, causing it to blister. “Close your eyes and focus on the heat. The heat is your Yoki. Feel it.” Taisho squirmed for a moment trying to get away but then took a deep breath, “push my hand off. Find your Yoki. Push the heat through these two fingers.” He wiggled the ring and middle fingers.

Taisho close his hands. He winced in pain. Suddenly, yellow mist shot from his hand and skimmed across Sesshomaru’s leaving streaks of singed cream colored skin. Sesshomaru smiled, “good. Again.” Sesshomaru slowly released Dokkasu from his hand again. Taisho focused and in less time, the yellow mist shot from his hand, burning Sesshomaru’s.

“To-san! Look! Did you see what I did?” Taisho jumped up and down in excitement.

Kagome’s mouth was on the floor. Taisho’s hand was slightly blistered but she had finally seen him do something that he always felt jealous of his siblings for being able to. He finally showed the slightest hint that he had Yokai blood in him. “How did you know it was there? O-ni-sama that’s amazing!”

“Stop calling him that!” Inuyasha grumbled, “it sounds weird.”

Sesshomaru returned Kagome’s question with a stern look. He went back to the wall to sit down. He caught a whip that almost landed on his cheek in his hand. Izayoi laughed from behind the screen smiling mischievously at Sesshomaru. “She’s cute. I like my cousin.”

Curiously Inuyasha cut his wrist with his claw until blood came and smelled it, then lifted up Taisho’s finger and sniffed. “I don’t smell anything.”

Sesshomaru raised his own wrist and cut it lightly drawing blood. Inuyasha sniffed the air, sniffed his wrist and then Taisho’s finger. “That’s what father smelled like?”

Sesshomaru nodded, “the blood of Inu no Taisho is strong blood. Not to be diluted so quickly. Keep practicing Taisho.”

“Come on, everyone, we should leave these two alone to talk,” Inuyasha picked up Taisho in one hand and Izayoi in another. “Damn it!” Inuyasha dropped Taisho who was laughing and ran out the door. “Oi, you’re in big trouble now!” Inuyasha nursed his burned finger in his mouth.

“Bye, Ojisama!!” Taisho smiled spraying everything on the way out with his newly found poison.

“Bye O-ji-sama!” Sota said as he went out the door not before throwing more blades at Sesshomaru and giggling, followed by Kagome.

* * *

Jaken had been sitting quietly in the corner and finally stood up, “Rin, I think this Jaken is going to visit Kohaku for the evening. I will come back in the morning. Do you need Aun?”

“No, Jaken. Thank you,” she called. She heard him scurry from the hut. She knew she was alone and Sesshomaru was on the other side of the screen.

Rin began undressing she was desperate to sleep. She first took off her outer kimono and winced. Her shoulder hurt again. It seemed her back always hurt these days from nursing the baby. Her inner kimono was wrapped around her waist, leaving her naked from the waist up. She rubbed her shoulder trying to ease the pain.

Sesshomaru heard the slight utterance of pain and his breath caught when he glanced behind the screen. There she was, in all her beauty, naked from the waist up, rubbing one of her shoulders. The same shoulder he knew often caused her pain and discomfort. He felt the need to comfort that pain as he would have in the past. He would not sit in the corner any longer.

_Thunk, clunk_, the familiar sounds of Sesshomaru removing his armor and swords came from behind the screen. Rin had to catch her breath. Those sounds, including the sounds of him untucking his haori, had always happened right before he would, Rin felt warm hands wrap around her body. They held her wrists to her own chest and pulled her back against a heated chest. The hands that had slaughtered so many, gently brushed her hair over her shoulder as he laid a tender kiss on her bare collar bone. “Rin,” his voice sung in her ear, he ran his nose up her neck. “Forgive me…for leaving you for so long. Forgive me…for hurting you so deeply.” Rin looked at his claws. She touched them nervously tracing their razor edges. He continued holding her hands in his, then used his other hand to massage her aching shoulder.

“Mmh,” she bowed her neck down stretching the sore and tired muscles. Her skin tingled and her muscles loosened. His hand felt like heaven against her tired shoulder. Her skin was burning at his touch. Rin couldn’t deny that she missed this. The nights they had spent in each other’s arms. The pleasure that he gave her. When she didn’t resist, she felt his mouth moving along her neck and shoulder. He kissed down the center of her neck and between her shoulders. His hand released her wrists and found her breasts, caressing them and rolling the nipples with his middle fingers. His breath was hot against her right shoulder. He listened as her breath became labored and she held the hands that caressed her. He pulled her back against his chest and for a moment, just breathed in her scent and felt her warmth against his own. “I missed you,” he murmured in her ear. She smelled of arousal, of a hot summer morning. 

Rin turned around to face him. She still couldn’t speak. She was torn between wanting to still be angry and a body that had spent the last three months sustaining a baby and a need to be reminded that she was still desirable as a woman. She touched his face, traced the moon on his forehead, then threaded her fingers through the hair at the back of his neck pulling his lips to hers. _To hell with Kaede and purity_, she thought and she buried her lips in his. She teased his mouth with her tongue. She pulled his haori off and threw it to the side. He wrapped his arms around her waist half picking her up, taking one of her legs with him and running his hand the length of her buttocks down to her knees. Rin responded by lifting the other leg and wrapping her legs around his waist, rocking her heat into his. Sesshomaru lost his balance for a moment catching himself on the side of the hut and running his hand along her soft hips. The rest of her kimono fell from her hips to the furs beneath her. She dug her hands into the muscles in his shoulders as his mouth encapsulated one of her nipples. She moaned at the tug of his mouth, hardening her sensitive skin. She lowered her legs and touched the hand that massaged her left breast, she could barely breathe.

Sesshomaru hungrily returned Rin’s kisses, holding her close to his body. He could feel her trembling at his touch. He pulled away momentarily. Goosebumps covered her skin, “are you cold?” He nudged her nose up with his own, kissing her lips.

She shook her head, cupping his chin in her hand, her thumb ran along his bottom lip as she gasped for air, “no…I…I missed this. You and me.” She felt hot. There were flames between her legs begging to be released. She hadn’t felt this fire since the day Touma attacked them the second time. Rin was all too painfully aware of how she missed Sesshomaru’s touch. She ran her hands up the sides of his neck. She tugged his mouth back down to hers.

Sesshomaru lowered his forehead to rest against Rin’s and caressed her cheek with his hand. He pulled her flush against him. He spoke one word at a time, “I also missed _this_.”

Rin kissed the hand caressing her face and quickly felt another between her legs. “Mmmh,” she moaned. She felt herself going weak at the knees as pleasure shot up her stomach.

Sesshomaru lowered her onto the furs, gently stroking the growing bud between her thighs with his fingers in slow arousing circles, while finding her breasts with his mouth. Rin pulled the front of his hikama down and pulled his waist towards her face. She wrapped her tongue around him. He let out a low groan, catching himself against the wooden floor and moaning in deep pleasure, swaying his hips into her mouth. He felt a hunger for her body like he had not felt before. Not in the near millennia he had been alive did he feel the urge so badly to take a woman. He pulled away from Rin’s mouth and took her lips in his own. While doing so, he threw his hikama to the side. He kissed her fiercely. He trailed a path of hot, open mouthed kisses, down her neck, across her breasts. He grasped her left breast in his hand sucking the tip until she arched into his mouth. He licked down her soft stomach, and then slowly parted her legs. He teased her above her hip bones kissing one side and then the other. His eyes stopped still at her the delicate dark curls, that delivered his child, that endured so much agony. He stroked the lips reverently, before parting them to tenderly to lick her sweet center, flicking it firmly with his tongue. Her back vaulted in pleasure. She gripped the furs around her. He inserted two of his fingers inside, feeling himself harden with the slight moisture. Rin ran her fingers through his hair as the pleasure shot up her spine. He pushed harder with his fingers, continued flicking his tongue against her. She gripped the sides of his head, caressing the points of ears and tangling themselves in his long mane.

She called his name in panting ecstasy, and in moments he felt her reach her peak, as she did he raised his body over hers and before he could settle between her legs, she grabbed his hips, “slowly,” she told him.

He nodded, carefully grabbing her right hip lifting it to meet him. His golden eyes captured hers as they dilated and glazed in pleasure. He gently slid himself inside of her. He felt friction that hadn’t been there in the past.

“Ouch,” Rin pushed back on his chest, “that hurts.”

Sesshomaru looked down at her. Confused he pulled himself back out, “has it not healed completely?” He was panting trying to regain his composure. He slammed one of his hands into the wooded floor next to him to regain some composure. He rested his head against hers. He took one of her hands and put it on his chest to calm himself. He couldn’t speak. He was as desperate for her touch as she was for his.

Rin shook her head and then remembered what Kagome had given her, “just wait a moment,” she rolled over and grabbed the shell with the cream inside. She rolled it in her fingers and then pulled Sesshomaru close to her.

“What is it?” Sesshomaru held her hand and sniffed it.

Rin kissed his lips, “trust me,” she tickled his ears with her lips and laced his mouth her tongue. When she was sure he was distracted she massaged the cream onto him. He held her other hand kissing it as a moan escaped his lips. He pumped his hips into her hands. Her fingers dancing along his member made his stomach tighten and hips tense. Rin wrapped one of her legs around his waist again and with her hands slowly guided Sesshomaru back between her legs. He rocked himself more slowly inside of her this time, noting the moisture that had not been there before. He held her face between his hands, kissing her mouth. As he entered he rolled onto his back. Rin found herself on top of him. She moved her hips with his. He sat up and pulled her to his chest, folding her in his embrace.

He took her by the back of neck and kissed her lips softly, before holding her hands and slowly thrusting within her, “Sesshomaru,” she whispered panting in his ear. Rin ran her hands through his hair and looked into his eyes.

“What?” He was holding on, trying to make this moment last. He thought for one moment what spilling his seed inside of her again would do. He glanced at the sleeping bundle next to them, and knew he would be happy, if his seed implanted within her another child.

“I don’t hate you,” Rin moaned as he continued pushing and pulling within her and her hips continued pushing against his. She took the back of his neck and covered his mouth with her own, “I love you.”

Sesshomaru rolled himself back over until he was on top of Rin. He lovingly touched her faced and kissed her deeply. His hips tensed as he felt himself finish. He held himself up on his elbows, hovering over her face and tenderly kissing Rin’s mouth, “I never stopped loving you. I just lost my way,” he caressed her cheek with the back of his hand, “you are my heart Rin. You will always be my heart.” He held her gaze for a few moments feeling that vulnerability that his father had mentioned. It would be his undoing. Sesshomaru rolled off Rin and pulled her to his chest. He held her so he could see Rin and Yuki who slept near them. Sesshomaru wrapped Rin in the furs that surrounded them and gently caressed her stomach. It was then that he finally noticed the dark circles over her eyes, “you haven’t been sleeping.”

Rin shook her head, “how could I? I didn’t know where Yuki’s father was. I thought I was going to raise her alone. I thought no one would love me again. You don’t know humans. It’s not acceptable, what I did. If you hadn’t returned, I doubt I would have found another.” Rin rolled onto her stomach, but still close to Sesshomaru. “Rub my shoulders.”

Sesshomaru bent over and kissed each side, then rubbed her back softly. His stomach felt tight, thinking that eventually she would have looked for someone else. “I’ve heard of this belief that somehow I have tainted you. Yuki is beautiful like her mother.”

Rin picked her head up and rolled back onto her side so she could curl into Sesshomaru’s warm chest. “You think I’m beautiful?” Rin’s heart shook. He had rarely said those words in the past.

Sesshomaru turned on his side, so that their bodies were facing each other. He stroked her hair and cupped her chin and held her mouth against his, “you are the most beautiful human I have ever seen.”

“You never told me that before,” a tired grin crossed her face, “I forgot how nice it is, to be in your arms.”

“Come live with me Rin,” he held the back of her head and stroked her hair, “stay with me.”

Rin only answered with a meek smile. “I wish I could answer you now. I’m sorry.” Tears began to fall from her eyes, she brought his hand to her heart, “it still hurts.”

He nodded. He touched one of her tears wiping it away, “I wish…” he began then stopped, “Sleep, Rin. I don’t need an answer now.”

“I don’t,” her shoulders were shaking, Rin coughed. She tried to calm herself so she could finish her sentence. It felt like she was damming a river, “why did you leave me? I don’t understand.” She buried her face in his chest.

As soon as the words left her mouth Sesshomaru pulled her closer to him and wrapped her arms around his chest. He closed his eyes as his chin rested on top of her forehead, “calm yourself first, then I will explain again,” he pushed her face back and tried in vain to wipe the tears coming from her eyes. Rin’s shoulders rose and fell in stuttered breaths. Sesshomaru locked her lips in his, “I’m sorry.” He stroked her hair, from the top of her head until it hung over shoulders. “I lost our bond. When I woke it was gone. I was overwhelmed by everything I felt. Having you near me felt wrong. Being with a human felt wrong. Fathering a hanyou,” his eyes flicked to their sleeping baby, “I didn’t understand it. I didn’t know how to explain it. I didn’t know what happened. I died knowing I loved you,” he kissed Rin again, “I woke up empty. When I went to Bukoseno, my father’s soul was there. He helped me understand what I had left behind. When the bond was returned to me, Rin I came back. I was asleep for two months in Bukoseno’s limbs. Does that help?”

“No,” Rin’s answer came faster than she thought. She was still sniffling against his chest. “I needed you. I was hurt. My body went through so much and I welcomed our child without her father.”

Sesshomaru closed his eyes. He stroked Rin’s arm from her shoulder down to her hand and laced his fingers with hers, “I was scared Rin. That is the simplest way to explain it. I was scared of my own weakness. I fear nothing. The only fear I have ever experienced has been for others. For you. I have never been afraid of myself before. If I hadn’t gone, I would not have been able to retrieve my bond to you. Perhaps you are too tired to hear all of this now.”

“Maybe,” she answered softly. Rin nuzzled her face into his neck. She took the loop of his mokomoko around his shoulder and slid it off so she could put it under head. It felt right being so close to him again. “Promise me, you will be here when I wake up?”

“By my father, I will not leave you like this again. I will be here when you wake.” His eyes were intense. He cupped her cheek in his hand carefully and kissed her deeply, “now sleep.” He used that moment to smell her. Although they had shared their bodies, the tainted scent of hurt lingered on her skin. He did not understand humans, he knew that he had broken her soul, and crushed the loving flower that she was. If it meant that he spent the rest of her life making it up to her, he would. It would not happen again. He would never again leave her like this. “Close your eyes Rin,” Sesshomaru continued to stroke her hair.

“I’m afraid I will and I’ll wake up without you,” she mumbled. “She screams all night,” she whimpered. Rin sat up worried. Her middle finger moved the furs down from Yuki’s face, “she’s so quiet now.” Yuki had never been this complacent for her.

Sesshomaru tugged her back down onto his chest. He held her around the waist. “Close your eyes, my heart. I’m here now. I will be here when you wake.”

Steadily her tears ceased. Her shoulders calmed. Her breathing became more even. She slept soundly against the demon she loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and kudos. As mentioned I think last time I posted. A member of my family is having surgery this week so I will try to get the last chapter up but it may be delayed.
> 
> Who else likes him calling her, "my heart"? When I first wrote that I thought I was being all original. That was until the episode where he first meets Rin. Totosai says what happens with Sesshomaru and Tenseiga depends on his heart. Right after he meets Rin. 
> 
> Remember to kudo and comment please!


	10. Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Final Chapter. Rin and Sesshomaru find the middle road of their relationship.

Halfway through the night as the fire began to burn low, Sesshomaru stared blankly at the ceiling while lying on his back. Rin still curled into his chest breathing peacefully. He draped one arm around her shoulder and the other he put behind his head as he counted the boards on the ceiling. He ran the pads of his fingers up and down her shoulder. A soft cooing came from next them. The bundle that had been sleeping so soundly was stirring. Yuki clucked her tongue, reaching tiny clawed hands out to her mother. Sesshomaru’s mouth twitched into a steady grin. Rin rolled over half asleep and picked Yuki up. She latched Yuki to her breast as she lay on her side. Sesshomaru marveled that Rin was able to fall back asleep while the baby fed. He turned onto his side leaning over Rin’s bare shoulder and gently stroked Yuki’s cheek as she fed. There was something so beautiful about Rin feeding his child. Yuki nursed happily, swallowing in between large gulps of milk. He hadn’t noticed the night before how her breasts had swelled. A line of milk dripped from the breast that wasn’t being nursed on. He picked up the trace milk in his finger smelling it. He found the strange sweet scent attractive.

“Yuki,” he murmured to his daughter. He noted the similarity between the stripes on her face and the ones on his wrists. _So, this is how I will live? The father of a hanyou._ _Why is my heart not repulsed? My heart only feels warmth. _He lowered his head and kissed the back of Rin’s head, _my lips on this human feel like fire. It feels like home. Like heaven. _

Rin’s groaned, the shivered. Her hand searched blindly for the cover. Sesshomaru reached for it and covered her trembling shoulder. Rin absent mindedly covered Yuki as well. She pushed the covers down below the infant’s face. After a while the baby came off Rin’s breast. She slowly pulled herself awake. She turned for a moment to see Sesshomaru curiously gazing at her. “I’m going to put more wood in the fire. It’s so cold.” Rin reached out to grab one of her yukatas that was in a pile on the floor. She dressed quickly, not bothering with tying it. She walked to the other side of the screen. While she did, Sesshomaru sat up and investigated the little lump that slept in the furs. Milk bubbles frothed by her small lips. She cooed lightly as she slept. He slanted himself over the sleeping baby sniffing her skin and nuzzling her nose.

Rin came around the folding screen with an exhausted smile on her face. She held her yukata closed with one hand.

Sesshomaru turned understanding he was caught fawning over his daughter. He opened his arms to Rin with a slight grin creasing the sides of his cheeks. “Come my heart,” he intoned to her. She smiled wearily removing the yukata from her shoulders. She lifted the brown furs and wined herself into his chest. He kissed her mouth rubbing her back. He felt her chilled skin against his. He became hard with desire but before he could say anything more to her, she was already asleep on his chest. Within moments Yuki was wiggling in the covers and whining softly. Sesshomaru sat up, cautiously moving Rin’s limp body with his. He reached a hand over and lifted his daughter off the bed. She squirmed in the yellow blanket she was wrapped in. He took the blanket off, and rewrapped his mokomoko over his shoulder making a nest to put her in. Yuki curled against his shoulder. Her eyes became lazy and tired. Soon she was breathing as peacefully as her mother. He touched her clawed toes, her clawed hands, and traced the shape of her little face. _Was this your plan for me father? _He almost started laughing as Rin’s hand slid up his chest and tangled itself in the hair by the nape of his neck. It took some work on his part to pry her fingers from his neck. “Sesshomaru?” She spoke in her sleep.

He answered by nudging his nose against hers and kissing her mouth.

Her eyes fluttered, “are you really here?”

He couldn’t tell if she was sleeping or awake. The hand that needed something to hold, buried itself in a free portion of his mokomoko. “I’m here,” he kissed her brow.

“Stay with me,” he almost missed it for how quiet she spoke.

“I’m here,” he ran his fingers up and down her shoulders until she relaxed and her breathing became even. “I love you,” he said with conviction, mouth pressed against her forehead. “I love you Rin.”

* * *

Later into the night before sunrise, Sesshomaru smelled Jaken even before he came into the hut. He heard the same noises of the fire being built as before and then the smell of food cooking. Jaken scurried around the screen. His mouth fell open. He had not expected to find the two of them, like that so soon. He had done is best to comfort Rin in Sesshomaru’s absence. Rin was wrapped around Sesshomaru’s bare waist. The bear skins she used as blankets covered her up to her shoulders, but dipped down just below his navel. Her face rest against his left pec, while one hand held a nervous almost painful grip in Sesshomaru’s mokomoko.

Sesshomaru met his gaze with a warning to back away. “Sesshomaru-sama…” Jaken stuttered. He backed away averting his gaze, only far enough to end parallel to the room divider. He bowed, nearly prostrating his entire body to the floor, before he spoke with measured words, “forgive this Jaken, Sesshomaru-sama.” He was taking his life into his ow hands by speak, “please be careful with Rin’s heart this time. She is strong as a mountain but inside, she is as soft as a morning dew. Your disappearance caused her great...”

“Shut up, Jaken,” Sesshomaru barked at him. _He finally can stand up to me. _Sesshomaru was mildly impressed by the imps ability to speak against him. Jaken was right though and Sesshomaru knew it. The green imp backed away humbly before the quiet racket started up again. _So this is how they spent their mornings. _Sesshomaru was mused. At least Jaken had cared for her in his absence. Yuki was still curled against his chest as she had been for the past few hours, sleeping soundly deep within his fur. Rin’s body was warm now. “When the food is ready, leave it next to Rin.” He commanded Jaken. She had been so tired and her muscles sore the night before. He didn’t want her to have to get up to eat. “Jaken, what are you making her?”

“Rice, vegetables. Inuyasha was going to hunt before the attack yesterday. I suppose he’ll do so tomorrow,” Jaken kept his voice low so as not to wake Rin or Yuki. “Has Yuki-chan been sleeping?” Jaken nearly bit his tongue forgetting to whom he was addressing. He swiftly added, “she usually cries most of the night. Rin and I have been taking turns caring for her. Rin probably hasn’t slept this much since-” he immediately stopped talking.

_Since before I left. _Sesshomaru ran his thumb over Yuki’s small fingers. _Did you miss your Chichiue little one? Is it possible she knew my scent from birth? _He wondered. He had spent several hours holding her in the cave before he left. Did she remember him? The thought caused a wave of affection to spread through his chest. He affably touched his lips over the eyes of his sleeping daughter. _Yuki. _

Rin stirred for a moment. Long enough to catch his eyes, and as she had in the past, shut her eyes in solace. He felt a pride that had been missing. He was still able to comfort her with just his presence.

* * *

In the early morning hours, Rin startled awake. Her torso bolted upright. She turned to her side where Yuki’s furs were empty. Her heart leapt into her throat and pounded blood into her ears. “Where’s Yuki, Jaken!” She yelled. Rin was met with arms around her bare waist and a tender kiss on her cheek. She felt a bare chest against her back that warmed her against the morning chill. The sensation of hands around waist frightened her until she identified the yoki emanating from behind her. “Sesshomaru,” she held her heart.

“She’s here,” it was Sesshomaru’s voice in her ears. She had forgotten he was there. He pulled back his mokomoko from around his shoulder and revealed Yuki’s peach shaped face. Sesshoumaru laid a striped hand over the hand on her chest and crooned in her ear, “your heart’s pounding.”

“You scared me. She never sleeps this long. I thought something happened.” Rin relaxed against Sesshomaru’s chest taking a cleansing breath and softly touched Yuki. “I can’t believe she slept for so long in there. You held her the whole night?”

He nodded. His golden eyes glinted with an emotion. He opened his mouth and then closed it. Expressing himself would take time. He was sure the feeling he felt in that moment was regret that he had missed time with Yuki when she was new and a primitive need to care for Rin, who looked like she hadn’t slept at all in the months he was gone. He gently pulled Rin back down onto the bedding and into his embrace. She kissed his collar bone bringing a noises from his throat. Her fingers splayed across the muscles on his chest, exploring the familiar topography of his torso.

Rin noted his eyes, they seemed sad, if that was even possible and worried. “What is it?” She asked him. She pulled his face to hers, “your eyes. There is a sorrow in them,” she glanced at her sword by the wall longingly. It had helped to be able to sense the emotions he kept hidden so well. She was going to miss having that access to him. “I can’t use that to find out what is in your heart anymore.”

He would rather have faced a thousand of the most powerful Yokai or died on his own sword than to speak in that moment. “I have hurt you, deeply…even in your sleep, your skin was soaked with the scent of grief. I…” His grip on her arms tightened. He could not say the words.

Rin gave him a half knowing smile, “I think I know what you are trying to say.”

He nodded his head, but he would not entreat her gaze. He felt a hand grace his chest and flick near his heart.

“It hurts doesn’t it?” She touched the skin above his heart.

He took her chin in his hand, and slowly, tenderly kissed her lips, “yes.” There was a saltiness to his mouth that had not been there in the past. _The closest he’ll ever come to crying. _His eyes were searching, for once he did not captivate her stare, “can we move past this hurt, Rin?”

Rin sighed. She didn’t know how to answer that. Part of her wanted just that but the pain in her heart held her back. Instead of answering she ran her fingers gingerly over his nucleolus of his life. She was suddenly aware of raised skin and discolored flesh that looked gnarled like tree branches. “What is this?” She rubbed her thumb across the damaged flesh.

Sesshomaru sat up taking Rin with him and looked down at the skin over his heart, even he had not noticed it. “A scar,” he was as flabbergasted as Rin was. “I will have to speak to Bukoseno about this.” He touched it offended that there a mark on his body. _Chichiue…_his father would leave a permanent mark on his body to remind him of his bond to Rin.

Rin laced her fingers through his, “I will come live with you, but there will be conditions that must be met first. I want to move past this hurt and be with you once again. You will have to give my heart time to heal and reassurance you won’t leave me like this again.”

He heard something shift in the tone of her voice. “What reassurances?” He asked. Yuki pushed against his shoulder and let out a loud shriek.

Rin reached over and pulled her from warm nest. She lay down on her side with her back to Sesshomaru. Rin tickled Yuki’s feet. The infant yawned opening her tiny mouth revealing glistening red gums. Rin placed her nipple inside the baby’s mouth. Yuki sucked gratefully. Rin moved her hair over shoulder out of Yuki’s grasp. “I will tell you on only one condition.” She giggled mischievously.

“You toy with me,” a low frustrated growl escaped his lips. He turned on his side and handed Rin the bowl of food that Jaken had left while she slept.

Rin ate a few bites one handed, turned her face to Sesshomaru and laughed, “I will toy with you. As much as I want.”

She was answered with a guttural snarl.

“And you can growl all you want. I will tell you when Yuki is done eating.”

The low growls stopped and were replaced by warm breath on her shoulder. After several minutes it seemed the infant was done eating, on one side. Rin rolled over and let her nurse on the other side.

Sesshomaru caressed her breast with the back of his finger near where Yuki sucked furiously. Her swallows were the only sound in the hut. He watched intrigued. “Does it hurt?”

“At first it did. Kagome-sama and Sango-san had to help me get the hang of it,” she picked his hand up in hers. She laced her fingers between his. “Now it just feels like sucking. Her claws tickle my skin though when she does this,” she pointed to the little hand that opened and closed against Rin’s skin. “I hope she weans before those actually get sharp.”

He offered his finger for her to grasp. He leaned his mouth in and brushed his lips against Rin’s. He tilted her neck closer to his by the back of her neck. He sucked her bottom lip, then pulled away slowly.

“Wow,” Rin smiled. “I’m so happy you’re here.”

He rest his forehead against hers, creating a small nest between the two of them for Yuki. The infant flopped of her mother’s breast grateful. Rin sat up, pulled a clean cloth off a pile next to her and changed the soiled baby’s diaper. Sesshomaru wrinkled his nose at the smell. She threw the soiled one into a bucket. He observed enraptured by the attention Rin gave their daughter. “She’s so quiet with you near,” she picked her daughter up. Rin pat her back until she let out tiny burps.

“Why do you do this?” Sesshomaru asked perplexed.

“Babies can’t burp on their own. This helps the bubbles come up so they don’t spit up everything they eat. Haven’t you ever been around a baby before?”

“Perhaps 800 years ago, when this Sesshomaru was a boy,” he said amused.

“You’re changing the next diaper,” Rin passed Yuki to Sesshomaru. “Here, put her stomach against your chest, and your hand under her bottom.” She helped him support her until he had her securely, “now pat her back.”

He tapped between her shoulders daintily.

“You can do it a bit firmer,” she encouraged him.

He was rewarded with a belch next to his ear and white spit up on his shoulder. He glowered at Rin picking up a cloth and wiping his skin. Rin giggled covering her mouth. He tilted Yuki away from his body supporting her head. Her cheeks twitched into a large smile that flashed her red gums. His heart melted.

“She likes her Chichiue,” Rin scooted closer to Sesshomaru, resting her head against his shoulder.

“She does not know this Sesshomaru,” he muttered.

“I think she does. She screams most of the time. Since you returned she’s been quiet,” she kissed his arm. “She knows you Sesshomaru. You’ll be a good father.”

He scoffed, then sniffed her cheek again.

“Why do you keep smelling her?”

“She is mine. Her scent is new, unique,” he attempted to explain that he was embedding it in his memory.

“What does she smell like?”

“Snow, you, the milk that comes from your breasts,” he tickled Rin’s neck with his nose making her laugh. “You smell like morning dew and of this Sesshomaru. The way you should smell.”

“Does everyone have a smell?”

“They are all different. The Miko often smells of herbs and fresh earth. When she was younger perhaps of trees and some odd scent that must come from her time. Inuyasha smells of magnolia leaves, tree sap and the Miko.”

“Will her smell change?”

“Yours never has,” he kissed her lips, “you have always smelled of morning dew and flowers. I am glad to be with you again.”

Rin blushed.

Yuki yawned rubbing her eyes.

“That means she’s tired,” she turned to get a blanket to swaddle the baby in. “Are you going to give her to me?” Rin held out her arms for her daughter with a blanket draped over her wrist.

“You may show me what to do with that blanket,” he said almost too defiantly.

Rin snorted, laying the blanket on top of the furs, “lay her down on her back.”

He complied. Yuki fussed the moment her back felt the blanket beneath her. “Quiet little one,” Sesshomaru intoned affectionately.

Yuki cooed in response.

“Now you tuck one end under her belly, make sure her arms are straight. It helps her to stay warm,” she watched as Sesshomaru followed her instructions. “Now the bottom up to the shoulders,” she smiled as he did. “Finally wrap the last end all the way around her.”

Yuki struggled against the blanket crying, “I do not believe she likes this.”

“It helps conserve her energy so she stays warm while she sleeps,” Rin held her arms out again. “You don’t want me to take her?”

He rocked the baby in his arms. His nose continuously inhaled the skin just over her ears. Her scent permeated his scenes. “Chichiue missed you,” he whispered to his daughter.

Rin wiped a tear from her eyes smiling. “I missed you,” she lowered her head.

He raised his golden eyes from his daughter to Rin. He pulled her against his chest, holding both Rin and Yuki together. Yuki steadily nodded off in his arms. He set her down next to them and faced Rin, “what do you wish to discuss with this Sesshomaru.” He wiped the tears from her eyes. “Do not cry my heart,” he laced her lips with his.

She tried slapping the tears from her face remembering what she wanted from him before she would divulge her conditions. She rose off the furs, straddling Sesshomaru’s lap, still completely naked. She wrapped her arms around his neck. She slowly and purposefully kissed his mouth. His tongue slid into her mouth. He held her the sides of her face. The feel of her breasts against his skin gave rise to his excitement. He met her gaze for gaze. She studied his face, taking in his presence. She was only vaguely aware of feeling his excitement beneath her, dangerously close to her opening. The tips of her breasts rubbed against his chest. His ribs were breathing in wider breadths. A mischievous smile crossed Rin’s face that tickled Sesshomaru’s curiosity. “Now,” she spoke confidently finally shedding the sorrow that had tainted her mood. She leaned forward against his chest and brought her lips to his pointed ear and began whispering her final condition, that if fulfilled she would tell him what she needed in order to live with him.

A coy smile touched his lips, “now I know you are playing games with me. You think I can’t?”

Rin was blushing from head to toe, “I was desperate last night. It won’t be so easy this time.”

“Really?” He shifted his hips only slightly closing the gap between himself and the heat between her legs while pushing her waist against his. “Uhh,”he groaned finding himself plunged inside her slick velvet center. The sweet warmth made him catch his breath.

“Sesshomaru,” her hands were instantly grasped his neck, holding his face with eyes begging for more. She had an annoyed and heated look on her face.

“That was once,” he touched her lips with her his fingers and laced them with his own. “Will you persist in challenging me?”

Rin nodded moving her hips along his. She lifted up enough to expose most of his shaft before slushing her hips back down. He groaned in sweet pleasure feeling her slush back and forth against him, “because now that you did that, I’m sure that I will finish you off before you can draw your name from my lips again.”

The air suddenly became electrified. Sesshomaru’s hair seemed to float on its own and his eyes smoldered red around the edges. He grabbed Rin by the shoulders, magenta stripes tensing, “you forget one thing my heart,” he breathed tensely. “I am not a human whose body is lost to its impulses. I smelled your arousal from the moment you woke up in my arms. Your thirst for my touch is as insatiate as mine. I am Dai-Yokai with generations of pure blood running through my veins, you will yield.” He threw her down on her back and covered her body with his own pumping his hips teasingly within her. He nipped at her collar bone, he bit at her breasts. He exited her body, allowing his tongue to taste the curves and turns of her torso. He held her stomach down refusing to let her move. His tongue licked senuous lines down the middle of her stomach. He lapped around her navel, then grabbed her by the hips spreading her legs.

Rin wrinkled her nose in frustration, “no fair using…” she moaned breathlessly, unable to finish her sentence. How did he know how to do that with his tongue? The sensations were coming faster than she could keep up with.

There was no answer except a rumble from between her legs. She buried her fingers in his silken mane and closed her eyes while his face was focused somewhere else, trying to keep her mouth closed. She felt like she was on fire. Her skin tingled with arousal. She lift her legs in the air rocking her hips back and forth with each stroke his tongue took. The pain was like a fire building from beneath her delicate folds, up her cervix and into her stomach. She wrapped her legs around his neck widening the space for his mouth. “Oh…kami…S…” She stopped herself from shrieking his name.

* * *

Kaede made her way through the snow trudging with difficulty. She did not enjoy leaving the warmth of her hut. The firepit was so inviting. She heard from the children that their uncle had returned. The dear old lady had hoped to speak to him the night before but was encouraged to leave the two be. They needed time alone to solve their issues. When she heard that Rin invited the demon-lord into her hut for the night, Kaede felt the instant need to lecture Rin again about things she should not be doing. Even if it is with a majestic and powerful demon. She trudged lightly from her home into the forest. The snow was thick and deep. The morning sky was grey and chilled her lungs as she breathed. Steam rose from the chimney of Rin’s hut. As she made her way she heard the unmistakable sounds of passion.

Kaede strode faster intending on giving Sesshomaru a piece of her mind, for taking advantage of a young girl, when she heard Rin yelp, “Sesshomaru.”

He laughed, Kaede had never even seen him smile, “that was twice,” his voice was deep and throaty from outside the hut. _What are they doing?_

“You bit my shoulder!” That was Rin’s voice.

The laughter of a man and the moaning of Rin’s voice continued. “Will you yield now?” That was Sesshomaru’s voice.

Rin’s voice was rasping, “no…more.”

The sounds from the hut continued. Kaede stomped her feet up the stairs only to be met by the little Yokai, Jaken. “Out of the way little Yokai! How dare he come back here and begin doing that to her again. I’ll purify him if he won’t come out and talk to me.”

“Kaede!” Jaken yelped grabbing the sleeve of her kimono, “you must not disturb them,” Jaken refused to move. He waved Nintojo threateningly.

A howl came from inside the hut. A green whip lashed out at Jaken nearly taking his head off and snapping dangerously close to Kaede’s only good eye. Jaken ran from the hut, while Kaede backed back down the stairs carefully. The room screen came next flying through the door causing Kaede and Jaken to both hit the snow laden ground before it smashed into them. “Maybe I will wait until they are finished.” Kaede grumbled.

* * *

Sesshomaru stood up long enough to grab the screen that separated the hut and hurl it at the entrance. His sensitive ears heard Kaede outside and in bliss he had forgotten that Jaken was on the other side of the screen. Of course Jaken already knew to mind what he heard and give them their privacy from months travelling with them.

Rin stood up and folded her arms over her breast, breathing heavily, “hey! Don’t break my things!” She stomped her foot.

He grabbed her by the shoulders, hands shaking, “lay back down. I’m not done with you yet.” His muscles were trembling. What was left of the whites of his eyes were now solid red. His yoki flowed through him, containing his need to finish himself off within her. When he had her pinned to the ground, he gave his tongue a rest and leisurely rubbed the nub between her legs with his middle finger. Her head fell back in ecstasy. Pleasure shot through her thighs up into her stomach. His mouth moved along her neck. It was hot and desperate against her skin. She was breathless in his arms. He licked her nipples, noticing the changes in her breasts, they were larger and fuller, calling to him. She groaned loudly, “say my name.” He commanded Rin.

She shook her head gripping his wrists, her inside cramping. He knew how to torment her the moment she came close to orgasm, he pulled back stopping it.

“Say it,” he intensified the slow stroking with his thumb.

She refused biting her lip.

He lift her up onto his lap, back against his chest, he splayed her legs on either side of him. He pushed himself inside of her again. Breathing hard, he fought his body’s need to finish. He held her against his trunk. One hand toyed with her nipples. The other found her clit. His mouth licked and kissed the tender skin between ear and her shoulder. He felt her temperature rising, her body was shaking, the moans were intensifying. He pushed and pulled within her, on the brink himself. He felt like his shoulders and back would strain from effort.

“Your tormenting me,” Rin leaned into his back. She held on to his neck, running her fingers through his hair, “it’s too slow.” She rocked her hips up and down in time with his movements, causing her nipples to brush harder against one of his hands.

“Say my name and I will send you to ecstasy,” he trapped her lips with his own.

She shook her defiantly. His thumb continued to tantalize her in agonizing slow circles. She felt her muscles tightening and contracting around him begging to be released. Rin moved her hips against him trying to sweeten the sensation, “tell me you love me,” she keened against the tip of his ear.

“I love you,” his lips brushed against hers.

“Sesshomaru,” she finally let out. He intensified and sped up the stroking of his thumb until Rin was practically howling and her center pulsating hungrily against his manhood. She couldn’t stop her body from shaking, or her hips from rocking against him.

He burst within her core, breaking their sweet embrace with labored breaths. “That was three times,” He kissed her left ear. He used his hands to stop himself from falling backwards, satisfied that he had met her request. Her body was covered in slick sweat mixed with his scent and the scent of their love making. It was aromatic to his nose. When she began to shiver from the morning cold, he lay back down, pulling Rin down with him and covered her with the furs. Footsteps outside alerted him that they still had an audience. He snarled loudly making it clear they were not welcome. “If they come in, I’ll kill them.” He said loud enough that he knew they heard them.

Rin was laughing exuberantly, “that was amazing.” She kissed his lips still quivering from his touch. She wrapped one leg around his ankles and rest her head against his warm pecs.

“You will not test me again, for now.” He wouldn’t mind doing it like that again either. “What are these conditions you require?” His nose brushed her neck. _It’s still there. _Even though it was clear she was happy to be with him, the scent of rotten figs and peppers that had been left in the sun too long pervaded her smell. Her heart was still aching._ Will she never forgive me?_ He dug his claws into her scalp, firmly combing out her thick black hair.

Rin rolled over so she could see his face and rubbed the spot on her shoulder where he had playfully bit her. “You broke my skin.”

Sesshomaru touched the wound. Her skin was damp, heated. He leaned over and kissed the bite mark, flicking his tongue over the raised skin, “now it will heal faster.”

“Your mouth has the same magic your blood does?” She felt the indentation marks.

“Blood is reserved for deep wounds. I barely grazed your shoulder. There are many ways for small amounts of my yoki to safely enter your body. This will not give you a fever. Conditions?” He prodded her.

Now it was Rin’s turn to look away. She spent a fair amount of time over the last three months thinking about what she would say if Sesshomaru ever returned to her. After she gave up, she decided that if he ever found them after they left the village, she would not go back to him, not without conditions. He was used to doing what he wanted, when he wanted with whom he felt for the last 900 years. She knew she was not perfect either, three months to a demon was perhaps the blink of an eye. To her it had been a lifetime. If he had only just said how he felt. She knew his reticence to admit that he felt emotions deep underneath his harsh exterior. “Never hide your emotions from me again. It wouldn’t have hurt so badly if you had explained it to me. I would have accepted your absence, eventually.” She lay back down onto his chest, tracing the edges of the strange scar over his heart.

He was already silent and stoic staring at the ceiling in defense.

She moved his face to hers by his stubborn chin, “that means you have to say something Sesshomaru.”

He closed his eyes. He picked one of her hands up in his, “these emotions, the things that I feel,” it was like drawing water from stone, “sometimes there are no words.”

“You’re saying you don’t know how to express them?” She had never thought of that.

“Yes.” What is there to express in battle and conquest for power? The last time he had felt a strong burning emotion was when the vast majority of his army was slaughtered by the panther demons. He knew now he felt regret, anger and sorrow that their lives had been sacrificed for nothing.

“You promised to never leave me like that again,” Rin lowered her eyes, “you lied to me.”

“This Sesshomaru does not lie. But I am guilty of abandoning you,” he heaved a big sigh and shifted uncomfortably, “why must you persist in making me speak my heart?”

“Because I love your heart and because you cut me deeply by leaving. You should have told me something was missing. Instead you ran away to face it alone. Why won’t you let me comfort you?”

“You seek to comfort me? It is I who should be comforting you.” He put one arm over her shoulder and used his other hand to lace her fingers in his. He pressed his lips into her scalp.

“Comfort goes both directions. Why did you come to me last night? It wasn’t just for me. I saw it in your eyes.”

He nodded his head and touched his heart. Without words he gently stroked Rin’s wild hair and closed his eyes, “yes,” he answered. Simple and vague but enough Rin understood. He dreaded what he needed to say next. He had not told her yet. “Rin, there will still be times that I must leave you, especially in the coming years as I establish my territory. I will not endanger you and Yuki by taking you with me.” Hurt, he could smell it covering her anew. Tears formed on the edges of her eyes. He took her face in his hand, “I will come back and I will not stay away for long. I must leave tonight, but I will be back in a few days’ time. In time, I will find a guard for you in my absence and the frequency of my absences will be less.”

Rin considered what he said. He would be building a territory from the ground up. She had no idea what that entailed. “How will you build this territory?”

“Might,” he answered plainly. “I will begin by examining the lands around our future home to determine what is the easiest to defend. I do not require a vast territory. When I have established what will be our domain, I will force back the lands of the current four dai-yokai. They will either submit willingly, or by the end of my katana. Allies will be sought, allegiances made. It is time, I have wandered for long enough. There will be much bloodshed. It will not be safe for you to travel by my side with an infant.”

“Then you will agree to never leave me for more than three days unless it’s absolutely necessary,” she shot back quickly.

“Agreed. Is that all?” He did not like the line of this conversation. He had never allowed anyone in the past to tell him what they would or would not do. He simply took. Yet here was Rin, dominating him.

“No,” she answered quickly. “I want you to oversee my training from now on. If I can learn to fight you, I won’t have to fear the more powerful demons that would see us as game.”

“You will never have the strength to defeat me. But I agree, if you train against me, you will make a formidable slayer. I will help you hone your skills and further master the use of your katana. Perhaps we will firm this up,” he pat her flattened stomach.

“Are you saying I’m fat?” Rin’s eyes burned.

He bit his lower lip inside his mouth to keep himself from laughing. “It was firmer before.”

“You got me pregnant you jerk!” She rolled over covering her eyes.

“Are you crying?” He tugged on her wrists.

“No,” she choked out hiding her face from him.

“You are still emotional,” he hugged her from behind.

“Because you’re being mean,” she tried to get out of his arms.

Sesshomaru snorted tightening his grip. “You are still attractive. This body birthed my child. It is powerful. I felt your pains, while Yuki was born,” he finally succeeded in pulling her chin out from beneath her hands. He leaned his lips against her, drinking the tears from her lips with his tongue. He held it until her tears ceased. “Is that all? That I will speak my heart and return every three days to you?”

“I have two more.” She held fingers up in a V shape.

“You test my patience,” he grumbled at Rin.

“You deserve it,” she replied quickly and matched his widened eyes, “I will not be your lady in waiting. My heart is too wild for that,” she took his hand once again examining the claws intently. “You will find me human or hanyou servants. Ones that will be able to relate to me and accept our relationship. We will establish a haven for human-yokai couples and their children that will be under your protection.”

His throat was rumbling at the thought of having so many with tainted blood, but then he saw Yuki stretch. Her brow furrowed, crinkling the little crescent moon painting her forehead. “I will agree. I will not be happy about it. What are you looking for in my claws?” She had not stopped caressing the tips of his fingers, running the pads of her fingers over the tips of his claws. The touch made his skin tingle. She knew to be particularly cautious with the tips of his claws were the sharpest.

“I have seen you kill many with these, the poison that comes from them. On me they are so gentle and soft.” Rin sat up and turned around to face him covering her front with a blanket.

He gave her an annoyed look, tugging the blanket off her front. “You will not hide yourself from me. I know my strength. How do you think I can spar with Inuyasha and not kill him. Had I wanted he would have been dead long ago.”

Rin smiled hugging his neck, “I have one more request. I will not take no for an answer Sesshomaru. You will give me this, or you will leave me and not return.”

He sat up, his eyes challenging her brazenness. If it wasn’t for the grief still bathing her skin despite the comfort he tried to give her, he would have had more to say. _She presumes to tell me what to do. _Deep in his heart, he found her confidence arousing, and attractive. Where others groveled at his feet, she stood tall and demanded from him.

“I must go to the river to get water today. Usually Jaken comes with and Aun to help me carry it. Today, I want you to come with me and restore my honor by calling me your wife where the ears of the villagers can hear it. The names they call Yuki, and me, that I was your concubine, your whore. I don’t like the way the men stare at me like wild animals. As if I can’t read the thoughts in their minds from their stares. I don’t like the way they speak of Yuki.”

He held her gaze considering her request. His first impulse was to find the men that would look at _his_ Rin like that and slash their throats. He remembered the vision his father showed him, the sniggering, the comments, in the human world he had sullied her. Sesshomaru breathed lightly, and kissed Rin’s hand, “silly woman. You were my ‘wife’ that night under the sakura tree,” he touched her chin, “in my world, when we bond, that is like a human marriage. We just prefer privacy to our bonds because of the intimacy and often sporadic nature of it. When you are immortal, you don’t need titles. I will go with you, and the village will know that you are not a simple harlot, but the soulmate of a great dai-yokai and that as long as they treat my family with kindness and respect, they will be protected.”

“Family?” Rin’s mouth was dry. She never thought of him like that before.

“You are the mother of my child Rin and my heart, that makes you part of my family,” he stroked her chin. Rin leaned into his hands.

“Does that include Inuyasha?”

Sesshomaru gave one lower snarl and rolled his eyes begrudgingly, “yes and his less than hanyou children. _My_ Rin…you will not feel forsaken again.” The smell finally dissipated. The taint of grief was replaced with something different, a sweet tenderness.

Rin rolled on top of Sesshomaru, straddling his hips, kissing his mouth. “I forgive you,” she leaned over and whispered in his ears, “I still thirst,” his eyes lit up once again.

“Then I will quench your thirst,” he rolled her beneath him. He thumbed her chin, opening her mouth. He dipped his tongue against the roof of her mouth, “my heart. I love you.”

* * *

The day came to an end sooner than Rin wanted. Eventually Sesshomaru and Rin dressed themselves, allowing Jaken and Kaede to enter. Sesshomaru immediately shut Kaede down ensuring her that Rin would only be staying long enough for their home to built. When it was finished, she would leave with him. When Kaede persisted about Rin’s purity and that a proper wedding should be arranged, a snarl and cracking of claws was all it took to quiet her. He would not take her in the human custom, she was already his. He would assure her reputation was intact despite the talking from the villagers. Kaede finally relented understanding that the child she had raised was now a woman, a mother and in love with the demon upon whose lap she sat. It was odd to her elderly eyes to see such a fierce warrior clinging to the girl, whispering lovingly in her ears as if Kaede couldn’t see the hint of the smile that graced his lips as they hid behind her neck. She relented giving them peace and her blessing.

Jaken was instructed where the cottage was located. An area he also knew well. Even the toad recalled that day that Rin was taken onto Sesshomaru’s back in his giant dog form when she was a child and the weeks they had spent in that area waiting for Rin to heal from her injuries. Jaken was put in charge of building the rest of the cottage to Sesshomaru’s orders. He was to take Rin to their home every few weeks so it was built to her liking as well.

As Rin bundled herself and Yuki to walk to the river, Sesshomaru handed Rin a medium sized parchment wrapped package. She opened it and smiled at her demon lover. In it was a thick fur lined kimono made from the softest fur Rin had ever felt. The fur was white against soft grey wool, “I meant to give this to you, before Touma attacked. Before Yuki was born. I returned to our last camp to retrieve it” He picked it up out of her hands, shaking it out for Rin to put on. “It will keep you warm.” He was thanked by an overpowering kiss against his lips. One that made Jaken turn around shielding his eyes. Rin clung to his neck. He pulled her closer to him by the waist.

“It’s beautiful,” she muttered against his lips. “Thank you.”

He nodded in reply. 

“I need new boots,” she said sheepishly.

“This Sesshomaru will purchase some for you. Give me your foot,” he lifted one of them up. “They are thinner now that you have given birth.”

She had an urge to slap him in the head. There were things that just shouldn’t be commented on.

Sesshomaru took Yuki from Rin, unwrapped her thick blankets and put the child into the nest around his shoulder. He told Rin that she would be warmer there than tied to Rin’s front. Rin simply smiled at him, knowing that wasn’t the case. He wanted more time with his daughter and was too proud to admit it.

Sesshomaru was true to his word. He walked with Rin, Jaken and Aun to the river. Aun carried the wooden buckets on his back and the water skins. The villagers were milling about singing songs as the day was sunny with still a bit of chill. It was melting some of the snow. As soon as Rin was spotted with her entourage they immediately became quiet. Sesshomaru dared them with his eyes to say anything. Most of them were aware of his existence from when Rin was a child. He pulled her to him, kissing her mouth hotly for all to see, “those that honor my…_wife_, will be under my protection,” his voice boomed. “Those that don’t,” he simply raised a hand in the air and released his serpentine whip so it flashed near the faces of each villager missing them by only millimeters, then cracking with an ear deafening blow. He didn’t have to say anything else.

Rin’s heart was alight. Jaken and Aun helped Rin draw the water from the River while Sesshomaru found a comfortable place to sit. He drew Rin into his lap after a moment, “a woman of your station, should not draw water herself,” he glowered at the women by the river. They immediately began filling the buckets for Rin.

“I can manage,” she said softly with her arms around his neck.

He simply shook his head and held the two most important people in his life on either side of his chest.

* * *

When the sun began to set, after Rin had eaten supper, Sesshomaru stood up. The pained look on his face was all Rin needed to understand what was coming next. Sesshomaru picked up Yuki and kissed her cheek before handing her to Jaken. He motioned to Rin to follow him onto the porch of her small hut. His footfalls barely made a sound. Rin’s chest was tightening. She took Sesshomaru’s hand in hers and pulled him back until she could grasp his other hand. “I’m trying not to cry,” she muttered. He caressed the knuckles of her hands softly.

“I’ll return in three days’ time. Look for me by sunset,” he inclined his neck and tenderly kissed her lips. He moved his tongue inside her mouth. The soft kiss quickly turned desperate. He pulled her waist to his own. Salty sorrow filled her mouth, “I will come back Rin.”

In a moment of weakness she tried to say, “please st…”

He cut her off with another kiss, “don’t. If you ask, I may lose my resolve,” his voice was quiet like the morning wind. He shook his head against hers and closed his eyes, “I don’t enjoy leaving you.”

Rin couldn’t speak. She was afraid if she did, the floodgates would open and she would not be able to stop them.

“Do you need anything? Does Yuki?”

“Lighter blankets for spring,” Rin answered tearfully, “for Yuki. I have my old bedding from Kaede’s house.”

“I’ll bring something softer for us. You deserve better than old bedding,” he massaged Rin’s hands. “You’re getting cold.”

Rin flung herself against his chest nearly scraping her face against the spikes on his left shoulder, “I love you Sesshomaru. Please, just hold me a little longer before you go.”

“My heart,” he stroked her hair from her face. “I will come back Rin. Trust me as you once did. I will return to you,” he kissed Rin’s forehead, and pulled her face from his chest to kiss her mouth. He allowed himself to feel the heaviness in his chest and use his lips to express that emotion to Rin. “Inuyasha will keep watch over you until I can find someone more suitable. Three days,” his voice sounded hoarse. He held Rin close to his chest breathing in her smell glad that she once again smelled of morning dew and him. For many minutes he refused to release her. One last kissed graced her mouth before he knew if he didn’t leave in that second, he would not leave at all. He let his arms fall to his sides. As he walked down the steps Rin held onto one of his hands. He slowly moved his hand free of hers, “three days,” he repeated and then disappeared into a ball of light.

Rin took a deep breath trying to steady her nerves and fluttering heart before she went back into the hut. Jaken was singing to Yuki who was crying, the baby was hungry again. _Three days. It feels like a lifetime. My Sesshomaru._

* * *

**Three years later…**

He was blood soaked and eager to change his clothes. The last three years he had established boundaries, made allies and new enemies. His enemies knew where he stood, knew where to stop. All knew the lines of his borders. It was not a large territory but enough land to protect his family. He made covenants with demon tribes on the borders he decided were the easiest to defend. Those that opposed him, were met with a swift end. His first stop had been the wolf tribe. Koga was all too happy to accept the alliance and guard the northern mountain border against intruders. The wolf-demon knew that the majority of his strength before had come from the Shikon shards without them, he didn’t stand a chance against Sesshomaru.

The bats had tried to challenge him but gave up when they witnessed the power of Bakusaiga after losing half their tribe. The snakes were nearly eradicated and the ogres cowered in fear. From his own kind he made alliances and found a male inu-Yokai to act as Rin’s protector in his stead. Rin begrudgingly accepted the guard despite training with Sesshomaru and regaining her former agility and speed. Whenever she became stir crazy he would take her into a forest he knew was crawling with hostile Yokai and sit under a tree while she took down the hoards herself. 

Sesshomaru left Rin a necklace to keep near her heart when he returned along with the blankets she requested. It was made from the finest gold with a large diamond hanging from it. It was his way of staying close to her heart while he was away. He never stayed away for more than three days, on only a few occasions when he did, he found ways to send messengers through his new allies, to circumvent her heart ever breaking the way it had before. When he returned by sunset each time, he immediately dismissed Jaken outside the hut and led Rin to the fur pallet on the floor, losing himself in her touch and finding contentment in her arms. Yuki grew during this time. She was gaining in strength and agility. His favorite memories were holding her in the dead of night by the light of the fire while Rin slept peacefully against his bare chest.

When the snow melted Sesshomaru left Jaken at what would become their estate to take charge of the home that was being built and ensure the builders finished in a timely fashion. Sesshomaru insisted on the bedroom and dining areas being completed first so he could move Rin and Yuki as soon as possible. As promised, miles from their home, he established a village that was protected by a barrier made by Miroku for humans and Yokai with fields of green grass for their children to play. Within four months their home was completed enough for him to move Rin and Yuki. Rin called it a cottage and quickly turned it into a home. It smelled of the flowers she hung in the walkways. Their own large bedroom was attached to the nursery. In the summer months, they moved their bedding under the cherry tree enjoying the fresh air, and as Rin said, the first time she felt his love. When he returned during those times, he took Rin into the hot springs with him allowing her to bathe the blood and foul moods from his body. One day she sat beside him and massaged his shoulders loosening his muscles until he was practically purring in peace.

* * *

Today he had battled and made a final stand to the west of his village taking down several powerful Yokai in the process and making it clear that he would not allow anyone to question his borders. He had meant to stay longer but something kept tugging at his awareness. He was needed at home. She was calling for him. When he landed at the entrance of their growing home, the air smelled different. Three years later, the village milled with Yokai-human couples, and their hanyou children. Their home now included guest rooms, a large dining hall for important visitors, and greeting area when his allies came. He had Jaken add a study in the family wing and if he did not find Rin in the garden or the village, she would be there reading to Yuki.

“Chichiue!!” Came a small voice from the path that lead to their estate. The little girl was dressed in a lavender kimono with a yellow sash tied around her back. Her white hair was tied high in two pony tails. The stripes on her cheeks glowed in the sunlight. Sesshomaru’s eyes opened widely as he saw his mother behind the little girl. He let a brief smile cross his lips at Yuki’s presence. His Yuki had grown. Her legs were long and gangly now. Her feet pad softly on the marble flooring not making a sound. She had tiny claws protruding from her toenails and finger nails. She liked to show him that she could melt the walls. The small one ran into his arms. He picked her up. “I smelled you coming,” she sniffed his shoulder, “you stink and you almost missed it!” Little arms wrapped his neck.

“Missed what?” He asked curiously but felt like he knew. The tension was in the air and the smell of new life.

“Ka-san! She’s having the baby. Sobo-sama is here too. So is O-ji-san and Oba-san! And all my cousins.” Yuki pointed at Sesshomaru’s mother. It took nearly three years of Rin not having another child for the message his father was trying to teach him to finally make sense. He controlled when a child was born. His seed was dead if it wasn’t infused with his yoki. When he thought back to the vision, the light that emanated from his body and lit within hers, he knew that he had to allow himself to go into a primal mode again. He feared allowing himself to do that. The vision of Rin in his mind disturbed him. When he finally confronted her she answered truthfully, that the experience once he changed wasn’t as pleasant as she let on. It was with great caution, that he allowed himself to enter his primal state. That time he tried to retain more control over his actions. Within two months, she was pregnant again.

“I see you invited yourself.” Chagrined he glanced at his mother.

“I had to. Last time you didn’t tell me until I came looking. Cruel son that you are,” Sesshomaru’s mother cautiously approached him.

Sesshomaru did not respond. He held Yuki to him and flew back into the air. Rin’s scent came heavily from the garden. His mother followed him into the air. In a moment he heard Rin shrieking in pain. His heart constricted. He hated seeing her in pain. When he landed, he saw the monk and taijia’s children in a room playing with his own nieces and nephews. Inuyasha stood in the doorway holding a girl child that looked to be a year old with the same black hair as Taisho. He stopped next to Inuyasha and handed him a small pouch.

Inuyasha poured the contents into his free hand, inside were four tiny fangs. Inuyasha looked at his brother in silent recognition of the gift he had given him. “Take them to Totosai,” was all Sesshomaru said before his eyes set on his beloved Rin. She was sobbing in the middle of the garden, underneath the cherry tree, surrounded by Kagome, Sango, Kaede and her two servants. She was on her hands and knees, with her backside exposed. Her hands trembled as each pain came to her. Kagome rubbed Rin’s lower back encouraging her that it was okay, Sango applied what looked like oil along on her skin that smelled like mint.

Kaede came over quickly and tried to push Sesshomaru back into the estate, “this isn’t a place for men.”

“I am not a man,” he replied firmly and strode past Kaede.

“Is he here?” Rin was panting. It was almost too much to believe he was there. Her clothes were plain. There were white cloths stained with her blood between her legs. “Sesshomaru?” His named ended in a primal howl. Rin began breathing deeply trying to remain in control of her body. The pain was all too much for her. The waves washed over her like she was drowning in the ocean. Sesshomaru knelt down next to her. He removed his armor, handed it to one of the human servants and then took off his blood stained outer haori handing it to the other, “Rin,” he put a hand on her back, “I’m here.” There was a pool of tears below her face. She looked at him, with big round brown eyes that plead with him to take the pain away.

“I’m so glad, ow,” the cry changed from high pitched to deep throated growl. Her body convulsed as she bore down against the pain. “Help me,” she cried, “it hurts…please Sesshomaru,” she tried to grip his wrist, her fingers fumbling. “AHHHH!” She screamed in agony.

“I’m here,” he whispered. He rubbed her arms. He continued until her breaths became more stable.

“Your home early,” she struggled to concentrate, having a slight reprieve between pains. “You’re here.”

“Oh it’s coming I can see the head!” Kagome was behind Rin with Sango. The anticipation in the air was electrifying. Kaede walked up quickly and also squat down behind Rin.

Sesshomaru would have rather slayed a dragon than watch Rin in pain and be unable to help her. His eyes were intent on Rin’s. He wiped her tears with the only clean area on his white sleeve. Smelling the odor of the demon blood on his inner haori, he removed that as well, and handed it to the servants. He wrapped his bare chest within his tail and sat down in front of Rin. He kept one hand on her back, the other gently held her wrist. When the next pain came she threw her head forward until her eyes were in his shoulder. Her mouth clamped down on an area of his exposed skin near his collar bone. She couldn’t hold back her cries. “Take the pain, please,” she sobbed. “It burns ow.”

“Shh,” he hushed her next to her ear. He caressed the line of her jaw, and kissed the top of her head.

Her body relaxed, signaling the end of the contraction. “I’m so tired,” Rin rest her head against his shoulder. “I’m so tired. My arms feel like jelly.”

He responded by stroking the top of her head and muttering in her ear. “Come,” he took her hands. “Use my strength.”

“I can’t move,” she shook her head. Instantly another pain came. She cried and sobbed, begging him to take her pain to save her.

“She’s been in labor since yesterday,” Kaede explained to Sesshomaru. “She’s exhausted.”

He waited for the pain to end. He slowly moved her hands around his neck until she was only on her knees. “Rest against me. Put something soft beneath her,” he told the servants, who immediately brought a flat pillow. He took it and put it between his legs. He helped Rin put her knees on it, “turn around,” he assisted her, not before she nearly buckled in his arms once again in pain. He whispered softly in her ear as she cried out. He ran his claws through her hair allowing them to softly graze her scalp. The entire village would know at this point that their child was coming. The pain ended allowing her to move more freely. Once he had her sitting on the pillow, with her head on his shoulder, she gripped his upraised knees. He remembered this pain all too well from when the sword connected them, even he had been brought to his knees by it.

“Rin lift your knees up, close to your chest.” Kaede encouraged her, “it will give the baby more space to come out.”

Rin shook her head, too delirious from pain to comply. Sango and Kagome pushed her legs up for her. “It will be over soon,” Sango encouraged her and laid a warm cloth against Rin’s opening, “soon.”

“This is not a place for men,” Kaede glared at Sesshomaru once again.

“She’s pushing O-ni-sama. This is the worst part. The head will come out soon. Help her stay upright,” Kagome instructed him.

“He should not be here,” Kaede barked back at Kagome.

Sesshomaru flashed a deadly look at the old woman but was quickly distracted when he saw small pointy ears, one white and the other black, then white hair with a black streak down the left the side come, then a forehead with a moon came from between Rin’s upraised legs. Rin was screaming non-stop now. The pain was like a burning fire. Sesshomaru held her around the chest. He pressed his nose against her neck and closed his eyes, willing the pain away. He felt useless. Rin gripped the fluff of Sesshomaru’s tail, begging him to take the pain away and rescue her. He murmured hushed tones in her ear. “You’re so brave. Just push my heart. It will be over soon.”

“I can’t,” she wept.

“Yes you can,” he urged her. “Breath with me,” he took a deep breath knowing that she would feel the movement against her back.

She tried to follow his movements with sobs in between.

“This is the worst part,” Kagome told him, “the baby is stretching her.” She supported Rin’s perineum with her a warm cloth. “It’s okay Rin.”

He supported Rin with his arms. She held his wrists and buried her nose in his shoulder. As the baby’s face slowly appeared the women around Rin encouraged her to breathe. The rest happened quickly and in one big blood curdling scream, the rest of the baby came from Rin’s body. Kaede caught the baby in her hands and laid the squalling wet infant on Rin’s chest. Kaede opened the front of Rin’s kimono, tucking the infant against her skin. “You did it Rin,” Kaede beamed happily. “Sango, the herbs for the bleeding.” She massaged Rin’s deflated stomach in strong circles.

“I did it,” Rin breathed relieved. She gazed lovingly at Sesshomaru through tired, hooded eyes. “I did it.”

Sesshomaru was speechless, not from choice this time. Rin’s body shook against him as she tried to catch her breath. Her glistening eyes were on the baby. She pressed her forehead against Sesshomaru, who immediately kissed her sweating brow. She parted the baby’s legs curiously. Sesshomaru smiled seeing that it was a boy this time. “We have a son. Sesshomaru, it’s a boy!”

Yells of excitement surrounded them.

“Toga,” he told her. It was the first time Kaede had ever seen a smile cross his lips.

“You named the last one. I want to name him for my father.” She let her head fall back on Sesshomaru’s chest. Rin helped the baby on to her breast as Kaede and Kagome busied themselves with the afterbirth.

“Toga,” Sesshomaru insisted as he rubbed Rin’s shoulders.

“Harutoga,” Rin argued back, “ow…” She leaned forward. Sesshomaru braced her back with his hand.

Sesshomaru did not want to watch what else was coming from Rin. “Harutoga?” He thought for a moment, “I find this acceptable.” Rin put her head on Sesshomaru’s chest. He continued rubbing her shoulders.

“Hello little one,” Rin touched the stripes on her son’s cheeks, “your blood is strong. Inuyasha didn’t inherit the stripes from your father.”

A low growl tickled Rin’s ear that was against Sesshomaru’s throat.

“Oh, would you stop that,” Rin teased him. She mumbled quietly so only he could hear, “you know you love your brother.”

“I do not.” Sesshomaru touched the pointed ears, “not strong enough to do away with this reminder.”

Rin joined in gently stroking the pointed ears, “they’re cute. I like pointed ears.”

“My ears are pointed,” Sesshomaru reminded her.

Rin elbowed him gently in the stomach. “You’re here,” she sighed.

“I am,” he muttered by her ear.

Kagome and Kaede cleaned Rin and put herbs to help her heal and control the bleeding. They encouraged Rin to stay put until the shaking stopped. She was all too happy to be leaning against Sesshomaru’s tail wrapped chest. When she finished shaking she looked at her servants and asked, “take me back to my bedroom please?”

“Unnecessary,” Sesshomaru gingerly picked her up in his arms and carried her past the crowd that had been watching her. When he walked past Inuyasha, Inuyasha pat him on the shoulder, “congratulations, ni-san,”

He shot Inuyasha a dirty look and mouthed a threat as he passed the children that were playing in the foyer by the garden. The Taijia’s family was continuing to increase. He spotted at least six of their dark-haired children chasing Taisho, Izayoi and Sota. He hefted her down the short hallway into their bedroom. Sesshomaru lay her down on the bedding with their new son. He lay the covers over her. She looked a wreck. Her hair was matted in sweat. Her eyes were darkened with exhaustion but he could tell she was happy. “I will take you to the hot springs and bathe you after the announcement. By then the garden should be empty again. I will forbid anyone to enter it after.”

“That sounds nice,” Rin smiled weakly. “It’s warm enough now. We should bring our bedding back to the garden.”

“What is it?” Yuki’s voice called from the hall. She ran into the room, jumped onto the bed and curled next to her mother.

“A brother.” Rin responded.

Yuki folded her arms pouting with her feet sticking out straight, her bottom lip folded out in a pout, “this Yuki wanted a sister!” She shot a hand out and melted a nearby vase.

Rin laughed a melody of notes before she saw Sesshomaru’s mother in the doorway. 

Sesshomaru’s face hardened, “take Yuki to the other children,” he told his mother.

Yuki ran to her grandmother. She took her hand leading her grand-daughter out of her parents rooms. When the door closed, Sesshomaru climbed into the bedding next to Rin. He unwrapped his mokomoko from his chest, and helped Rin remove her kimono. He lay her back against himself and smelled her hair. He kissed her neck softly, “I can only stay a few minutes. The village will want to know that you and the baby are well.”

“Let someone else make the announcement. Your mother can do it,” Rin worked to latch the new baby onto her breast. She rest her head against his shoulder. His skin was warm and inviting. “Your skin is soothing. I’m so glad you’re here this time.”

He nuzzled Rin and touched his son’s head. Harutoga was double striped on his cheeks like his father, a crescent moon his forehead, but what caught Sesshomaru’s eyes was the black streak of fur and hair that began at his left ear and ran down his head. Rin groaned in pain and pressed her head into Sesshomaru’s neck for comfort.

“Alright?” He asked her concerned

“Yes, my love, just stay with me for a while?”

Sesshomaru wrapped his arms under Rin’s holding her and the baby, “my heart,” he whispered in Rin’s ear, and kissed her lips. “As long as you need.” It didn’t take long for Rin to fall asleep against Sesshomaru’s chest. Once she did, he took Harutoga and looped his tail around his shoulder and nestled his new son inside. He tickled the baby’s cheek and then closed his own eyes in contentment.

**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so glad I can get this last chapter up. There is a sequel to this story, so stay tuned :). More drabbles will be posted that follow the characters but have nothing to do with this story. Ergo...they are in drabbles.
> 
> Hurray we made it through surgery thank Goodness. I would feel bad if this story sat around one chapter away from completion for a few weeks while we finished recovering.


	11. Harutoga

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I figured it out. I was trying to draw a picture of Yuki, mind you have I haven't drawn anything in ten years. This is Harutoga. I may put a baby pic of Yuki up in a few weeks if I get around to drawing it.


End file.
